DS is going to be 17 in April. He’s been with his first ever girlfriend for about 2 months. They usually spend 2 afternoons/evenings together, in their bedrooms, I think just cuddling. She’s a sweet girl and they seem very happy. She’s about 6 months older than DS.
However, DS is a very “stressy” kid, lots of OCD traits, often anxious, takes life very seriously, just a very emotional person. And his girlfriend is also very anxious, lots of emotion, gets very worried about all sorts of things. They already had a couple of arguments when she got drunk at parties over Christmas and accused him of not paying her enough attention, or paying her too much attention - basically drunk teen stuff.
Anyway, they want to spend the night together, at her house. Her parents are fine with this apparently. The clear implication is that they’ll be having sex. Of course I can’t control what they do when they’re together during the day, but giving permission for a full overnight just feels too much too soon, given the degree of teen angst that’s been going on. I’m worried that DS doesn’t have the emotional maturity to deal with the fallout of taking the relationship to the sleepover stage.
But apparently I’m mean and horrible, and everyone else’s parents allow their kids to sleep with the partners at this stage. I’ve said he should wait till he’s 17 before they stay overnight, when they’ll have been together longer.
AIBU to have this rule? Should I be more permissive?