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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not be arsed to work anymore

95 replies

AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:24

I just can’t do this for years and years and years. I’m actually unemployed right now and the happiest I’ve ever been. I’m actively looking for a new role but it’s all bullshit, massive JD’s for mediocre pay and mainly 5 days in the office. There is just so much more to life, why did humans create this way of living?

OP posts:
JasmineMac · 12/02/2026 23:27

AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:24

I just can’t do this for years and years and years. I’m actually unemployed right now and the happiest I’ve ever been. I’m actively looking for a new role but it’s all bullshit, massive JD’s for mediocre pay and mainly 5 days in the office. There is just so much more to life, why did humans create this way of living?

I think women are more prone to feeling this way, because whilst equality in the workplace has significantly progressed, equality in other areas hasn't. Running the show at home, childcare included, is still mainly a female pursuit. The reasons aren't cut and dry either - when I worked, I wanted to run the show at home (my husband was happy to organise child care, I just didn't want him to. I wanted to oversee it).

I think your question of how did we get here is an interesting one. Because you'll have utterly frazzled women queuing up to tell you that they'd simply hate not working. It's socially unacceptable now to be a housewife, but progressive to be a househusband.

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:22

BlackCatDiscoClub · 12/02/2026 23:20

Same for getting a portfolio together. Type in everything you can recall about the work youve done, ask it what the framework should be to demonstrate experience for a role, then you can see what bits you need to fill out!

Yes great idea, thank you. I have accomplishments on my CV listed so I’m going to add those into a fancier looking portfolio - I’ll ask AI to help me fluff that out. I think I can bulk it out. Maybe do a few case studies too.

OP posts:
BlackCatDiscoClub · 12/02/2026 23:20

Same for getting a portfolio together. Type in everything you can recall about the work youve done, ask it what the framework should be to demonstrate experience for a role, then you can see what bits you need to fill out!

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:20

BlackCatDiscoClub · 12/02/2026 23:16

If you cant find a job that is your passion, then yes it is shit. I'm lucky, after decades of shit jobs Ive fallen on my feet with work I care about. But it is so hard to give most of your life to something that doesn't mean anything. Especially when you have to give up so much time, hobbies, seeing your kids. And we have to work into our late 60s and 70s! Its crazy. Can you retrain into something that excited you at all?

Yes that’s exactly it. I did used to be so passionate about my industry (fashion) but now it just feels meaningless. I’ve had some really toxic working environments that have left a bad taste in my mouth.

Im not sure I could afford to retrain atm, we are saving to buy a flat and I just need to get back to work to top is back up again. I am trying to pivot sector though, unsuccessfully so far.

OP posts:
BlackCatDiscoClub · 12/02/2026 23:19

This is a great use of AI by the way! Use chatgpt or something like that, list your skills, your passions, and get it to suggest other career roles and what training/experience you are missing to achieve them. Then get it to set out a one year plan to achieve it

BlackCatDiscoClub · 12/02/2026 23:16

If you cant find a job that is your passion, then yes it is shit. I'm lucky, after decades of shit jobs Ive fallen on my feet with work I care about. But it is so hard to give most of your life to something that doesn't mean anything. Especially when you have to give up so much time, hobbies, seeing your kids. And we have to work into our late 60s and 70s! Its crazy. Can you retrain into something that excited you at all?

WallaceinAnderland · 12/02/2026 23:15

AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:10

I’m talking mostly about my silly marketing jobs that mean nothing, not actual important stuff.

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Those jobs are just a drop in the ocean amongst all the other jobs and not what you posted about. You said you often think about what would happen if everyone stopped working. Totally different scenario.

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:11

Knittedanimal · 12/02/2026 23:05

Your skills would be great for freelancing. Get in touch with your local authority and sign up to business start up/support courses. There are loads in this area. Try looking at different sectors on linked in. E.g.in the charity sector, many small orgs won't have resource for ft marketing role but might have project funding for marketing. You could build a portfolio of projects/clients.
I often think as you're doing and wonder at all the people typing emails and goung to Teams meetings and think, is this really what it's all about?

Agreed I think freelancing would help me feel a bit more control of my life. My concern is that I have no portfolio, all of my work is on company laptops that I’ve handed back over the years.

OP posts:
Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:10

WallaceinAnderland · 12/02/2026 23:08

You need the administrative workers to organise the physical labour. You also need shopkeepers and farmers and emergency workers. How would a hospital run without admin? We all need to work to survive and we work cooperatively because it's a hell of a lot easier than everyone having to fend for themselves.

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I’m talking mostly about my silly marketing jobs that mean nothing, not actual important stuff.

OP posts:
WallaceinAnderland · 12/02/2026 23:08

AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:51

Okay I’m just talking about ALL non essential jobs. They are all made up, as someone pointed out above that most of them are created to make rich people richer.

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You need the administrative workers to organise the physical labour. You also need shopkeepers and farmers and emergency workers. How would a hospital run without admin? We all need to work to survive and we work cooperatively because it's a hell of a lot easier than everyone having to fend for themselves.

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 23:07

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 23:01

OP this sounds like a you problem. There are plenty of jobs that make a difference and help people, do one of those.

Would love to. I’ve been applying to different sectors with no luck, the job market is awful right now. Can barely get an interview in the industry I’ve worked in for the past 10 years. I just don’t know where to start.

OP posts:
Knittedanimal · 12/02/2026 23:05

Your skills would be great for freelancing. Get in touch with your local authority and sign up to business start up/support courses. There are loads in this area. Try looking at different sectors on linked in. E.g.in the charity sector, many small orgs won't have resource for ft marketing role but might have project funding for marketing. You could build a portfolio of projects/clients.
I often think as you're doing and wonder at all the people typing emails and goung to Teams meetings and think, is this really what it's all about?

Emori · 12/02/2026 23:02

This might be a useful break for you OP to work out what you really want to do, how you would like your life to be and what steps you can take to get it into a shape that's more appealing for you. Working in an office is boring, mostly, there's a lot of bullshit, and loads of office jobs are going to be replaced by AI soon anyway. Think of something else. You need to do something though, because daytime telly is the pits.

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 23:01

OP this sounds like a you problem. There are plenty of jobs that make a difference and help people, do one of those.

BudgetBuster · 12/02/2026 22:59

AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:36

I understand you have to do something to get basic needs met, I’m talking more about modern life and how you can work yourself into the ground and STILL not be able to afford basics.

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Well that's not what your post said, is it?

Made up jobs exist because we have a huge population. There isn't enough "basic or traditional jobs" so the human race would teeter off again.

I think maybe you need a career change though

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 22:58

Where do you think 999 call handlers.work?

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 22:57

A lot of people working in offices do essential stuff.

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:52

Peakwarrior · 12/02/2026 22:51

At 32 your in your prime and young enough to change direction. Get a fulfilling job and make your lifestyle fit your income. Alot of people get on the hamster wheel of buying crap they don't need, keeping up with other people and have an empty feeling. Do something satisfying but do something, many don't which is why the developed world is stalling

I know. I just don’t know where to start. There is so much noise and pressure.

OP posts:
Peakwarrior · 12/02/2026 22:52

Sorry you're

Peakwarrior · 12/02/2026 22:51

At 32 your in your prime and young enough to change direction. Get a fulfilling job and make your lifestyle fit your income. Alot of people get on the hamster wheel of buying crap they don't need, keeping up with other people and have an empty feeling. Do something satisfying but do something, many don't which is why the developed world is stalling

Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:51

HelenaWilson · 12/02/2026 22:50

I more so mean office jobs rather than anything absolutely essential

When you're in work, presumably you expect to be paid? People who do payroll work in offices. People who work for banks, insurance companies, dvla, nhs, utilities, etc etc. A lot of things would not get done without people working in offices.

Edited

Okay I’m just talking about ALL non essential jobs. They are all made up, as someone pointed out above that most of them are created to make rich people richer.

OP posts:
Original poster
AurielleBaies · 12/02/2026 22:50

NotAnotherScarf · 12/02/2026 22:40

Ok then what do you want to do? Personally I got out of the corporate bull shit world at 40. Set up a gardening business and lived off a lot less money until I retired at 55. Having saved as much as possible..now I have a little part time job to pay for cider and chips and I'm happy

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I don’t mind what I do tbh, I just don’t want to trek to an office 5 days a week in the dark, to leave in the dark, never see my husband or my dog or have any time to myself.

if I could work a few hours a day and get my basic needs met, I’d be happy. All the other stuff is just extra.

OP posts:
HelenaWilson · 12/02/2026 22:50

I more so mean office jobs rather than anything absolutely essential

When you're in work, presumably you expect to be paid? People who do payroll work in offices. People who work for banks, insurance companies, dvla, nhs, utilities, etc etc. A lot of things would not get done without people working in offices.

Forty85 · 12/02/2026 22:49

I can't be arsed with it but do it and do a good job when I'm there. I just look forward to the evenings weekends and things I have booked in throughout the year that I can only afford through working. Holidays, weekends and nights away, concerts, festivals, comedy gigs, spending time with family etc.

Also furthering myself professionally doing a professional qualification through work so I can hopefully climb the ladder, earn more and live even better outside of work, that makes working more worthwhile.

Firesparks · 12/02/2026 22:42

I agree it’s rubbish! After kids I lost all my enthusiasm for work