dd15 induction tomorrow & i have a bug

Yes, it's an appalling idea.

From the sounds of the lad and his family there's no way he should be put on the birth cert and given PR.

He's abusive and we all know men abuse women through their kids.

Bullying and abuse are basically synonymous, which raises concerns. So no, he probably shouldn’t be put on the birth certificate by the op’s DD.

He can apply to court for PR if he feels strongly this he wants influence in major decisions. But he doesn’t even need PR to have a contact arrangement (through court or informally).

You can always be added at a later date, but it is extremely rare for a parent to ever have their PR removed. It is something that needs consideration given the bullying.

Not wanting to get drawn into the drama, but surely it's really about the baby's rights to know and bond with their father (rather than the father's right).

Surname is a matter of personal choice for the mother to make.

Whether the father is named or not on the birth certificate, giving him parental responsibility, is a different matter. As is whether his involvement needs to be supervised due to his apparent abusive behaviour towards the mother - that's the key thing.

Oh wow, so no one is allowed to respond to other posters 😵‍💫😵‍💫

What on earth are you talking about, sorry?

And I agree with the poster who said you sound emotionally invested.

Are you just making stuff up?? Reading but putting your own meaning to it?? Not even worth my time explaining your (incorrect) logic there.

Are you unhinged?? 😆😆 I’m literally responding to a post, as others do, this is a chat forum after all. 😵‍💫😵‍💫

Aww, I’m so pleased everything is ok

Let’s be real, the baby’s father will be useless. He bullied her while pregnant with his child.
Good luck, OP.

He was bullying the mother. Why should the DD have to take an abusive person with her and her baby to the registry office, and why would it be a good idea to give him automatic PR? He can still apply to have it of he is bothered about it. Plenty of teenage fathers are not.

I don't think the name matters when it comes to the fathers rights.

But I do agree the baby should have the mothers name. Highly unlikely she is going to marry the Dad and take his name. So the baby should have her name. Lots of silly things, clubs and groups who'll register child and who might use social media for communication, the same name acts as a memory jog, Karen Smith puts a note up, Bob won't be there, that will be Bob Smith rather than Bob Wilson.
Yeah yeah people should double check but reality is people will assume.

Traditionally that is the way it was done, Baby had mother's name, 95% of the time she would be married and have already taken the husbands name so baby had her new name.
But unmarried mothers gave their baby's their name.

You seem overly involved in this. Has it hit a nerve with you?

I’m referring to the posters who said not to give the baby the father’s surname, as if they do he will automatically then have rights to the baby. I know that’s not the way it works, others clearly don’t. I was pointing out that others want the father stripped of all rights, when it’s actually his baby too. Regardless of rights or wrongs, he is still now a father.

Whether anyone thinks they are fit enough or not really is not anyone else’s call though.Very undesirable people still have rights to their child. There’s always 3 sides to every story … his, hers, the actual truth 🤷‍♀️

Many congratulations, lunar! A wonderful ending to a very trying time.

I do hope you, and your youngest child, are soon fit and well. I expect you are already a lot better. These 'bugs' are a real bugger and always happen at the most inconvenient times, however the important thing is your daughter and grandson are OK. That's very exciting.

Good luck to you all. Let us know how you get on when she and her baby have been home a little while.

Omg my Nana used to always say whisht! 🥰
That poster is definitely a fool too 🤬

And he would have zero difficulty adding himself to the birth certificate if he wanted to

Not giving the child his father’s surname isn’t stripping him of any rights - what are you on about?

But the baby’s father and his family and friends have treated the baby’s mother appallingly and don’t sound like they are fit to be involved in the baby’s life.

Congrats OP. Cherish your girl and her son x

Congratulations to you all OP! 👶💙💐

What on earth are you on about?? You absolute insensitive loon 😡

Nor did the girl 'get' pregnant by herself. Funny that the posters who are saying this about the OP's daughter aren't mentioning that the father needs to grow up and deal with it … then there’s posters saying not to give the child the fathers surname, thereby stripping him of any rights 🤷‍♀️ madness. This baby has a mum and dad, who both made him together, yet some are saying to force dad out?? 🤦‍♀️

Congratulations @lunarwhisper and hope you feel better and can go meet your grandchild very soon.