To let myself go grey

I haven't been to the hairdressers for 40 years! I hate it and won't be paying to go somewhere I don't like. That won't be changing now I'm going grey. I couldn't care less tbh.

Stopped colouring mine seven years ago. It is now silver and grey and in excellent condition. I love it.

Why not find a local Facebook page for ND individuals and ask if anyone knows a hairdresser who will deliver a less stressful experience, with a calmer quieter environment and little chat. As to going grey, it really depends whether or not it suits you, I know people who look awful grey, others who look wonderful. I colour my hair at home, takes me about an hour start to finish, only do it every 6-8 weeks.

I'm mid 50s and my originally dark hair is its natural salt and pepper with some lighter streaks, @sunshine244 - I keep the beigeness away with Schwarzkopf purple shampoo which gives it a lovely sheen.

Some salons have a private room that is used for women with a variety of needs, whether religious, dealing with hair loss or whatever. I'm sure that a salon that has one would be happy to accommodate you if you mention that you can't cope with noise and chatter due to your disability.

I'm 43 and have dark brown hair with a lot of grey, including a very large stripe. I don't dye it for the same reasons as you. In theory I might like to colour it but I can't bear the thought of the faff and hassle. One new thing I've experienced in the last year is male work acquaintances asking me directly what age I am. The only conclusion I can draw is that they like to know what age women are (probably something to do with placing them in the attractive/unattractive box) and are so unused to seeing women under the age of 60 with grey hair that they just can't figure out what age I am. My face definitely doesn't look 60. I had my kids fairly young so that also doesn't square with they expect age-wise. It drives them so nuts that in the end they just ask. It's an interesting insight into how men's minds work.

I'm 50 and don't dye my hair. Haven't done for over a decade. I have a few grey hairs, but I don't think anyone notices to be fair (except my hairdresser) and come the summer when my hair goes golden in the sun, they will be even less noticeable.

I have a senior position at work and I don't understand your comment about grey hair being less professional. I have never in my life heard someone say anything along the lines of 'oh my gosh, have you seen Alice... Her grey hair just looks sooo unprofessional'. Surely grey hair would be more associated with age, wisdom and experience?

You need the right blend of colours. I'm brunette but I put a dark blonde dye all over so the greys is lightened rather than darkened and it really softens the look.

I’ve found a keratin treatment helpful but I know what you mean, the colour seemed to kind of defrizz it.

I agree. I’ve not found anyone treating me differently . What would someone say - you are grey. Er yes I am. Well actually someone did who hadn’t seen me for ages , not a very emotionally intelligent person and I said yes I am. Nothing terrible happened. I probably should have said yes so are you, what you actually mean is you’ve stopped dying your hair.

It’s interesting reading this, as I remember posting on a similar thread a couple of years ago and saying I was very happy to go grey. It reached a point where I didn’t like it though, so my hair is now dyed!

I started out with a cool stripe that I liked, but as it spread out I found it washed me out. It does depend on skin tone and so on. A friend of mine has very golden skin and pure white hair and looks amazing.

I went grey during Covid & followed Silver Revolution on FB to keep a positive mindset, I was done dyeing after 30 years of it. I’ve kept mine long too & love it now. I think the stray, course ones aren’t as noticeable once colour is natural. I say go for it, no more hours and £££ at the hairdresser - you might even wish you’d done it sooner x

I had my hair dyed every 8 weeks or so at the hairdresser and in the end, I started reacting to the chemicals so had to stop. I did go for a much shorter cut and just grew it out. Now I'm totally grey, mix of darker and light, and I'm just used to it. And whilst it is aging, so is a menopause mahogany box die as frankly no one has grey-free hair in their 50s and 60s. The dye looks too harsh against skin tone to me. I don't think you can win either way, to be honest edited to add that I'm 55.

Do what you prefer!

I can’t stand all the “rules” on these threads. Only if you have over a certain percentage of grey, only if it’s short, only if you don’t mind looking older. We should worry more about making ourselves happy and less about judging others.

Im 40, I stopped dying my hair a year ago. I have lots of grey, it’s a bit patchy. I would prefer it if I had solidly grey/silver hair, but it doesn’t bother me more than the upkeep of dye did. I probably look my age or maybe older. Who cares, getting old is a privilege.

My hair is/was medium dark brown, thick and fairly curly. It started greying slowly from my 20s and the odd grey hair at intervals looked rubbish, so I dyed it. As the volume of grey built up, I started getting the dreaded stripe as my roots grew out and I just couldn't bear it. I've let my grey keep advancing, and it's now probably 40-50% grey.

I don't really want to change the colour because I'm happy accepting the grey. My hair is even coarser though, and has ramped up its natural tendencies to be dull, frizzy and unkempt looking. Unfortunately I am very slack about grooming and lack the time/skill/money to tend to it very often. Would grey toners help make it look a bit less lifeless and crap or would they be pointless until I'm all grey? I don't want to bleach it at all

I went grey at 49 . Nobody in my life wanted me to but I wanted to as I was chasing roots almost weekly . I went from darkest brown to salt and pepper. I’ve never ever looked back and when I see old photos now my dark dyed hair looks like a deeply unflattering helmet . If you want to be grey be grey it’s just another colour.

I’m 62 and am embracing the grey and shock horror have shoulder length sure too 😀

That’s so funny. I’m convinced it’s because they hate people thinking that they’re “old”.
Mine tries hard to deny her age. I don’t understand the issue myself. I try to tell her that growing old is a privilege but she won’t have it.
Everytime she looks at my grey hair, it’s a reminder 🙈

I was dark blonde too OP. During covid I stopped colouring my hair thinking that if I didn't like it grey I could sort it out when lockdown ended.

My mum went white and I thought that might happen to me but what I ended up with is a mix of blonde, white blonde and grey that I absolutely love. People ask me if I've had a 'balayage'. I had to look it up.

Another thing was that I'd always had fine, flyaway hair but now it's coarser it seems thicker and sits where I put it. I'm in my early sixties.

I'd say try it and see, you might be well pleased with the results.

Exactly.

Well if she is completely white then she is lucky. However, most of us have white hair missed in with our original colour, which doesn’t look great.
OP, have you thought of having a hair dresser that comes to your home? I do this as my neck can’t stand the sinks at the hairdressers.

I'm 63 and never dyed my hair, but it's turned almost blonde, a mix of white and brown. For the coarseness I recommend Aveda Miracle Oil - it's made my hair sparkle and smoothed the grey texture. It's expensive but I only use a drop the size of a lentil before drying.

Your hair, your choice.

If the stress of the salon is the only thing stopping you, I’d have an honest conversation with your hairdresser and just say how challenging you find it and you’d love to schedule your appointments for first thing or last thing in the day etc and to not have to chat. Requesting a quiet appointment is totally a thing. Alternative is you visit a home hair dresser or have them visit you.

You do you OP and you shouldn't feel the need to comply with others choices. That said, I have regular hair dresser appointments for cut and colour /hilights and always will.
It makes me feel better.
I voted yanbu because I believe that you need to do what is best for you.

My cousin had been dying her hair to cover greys since her early 20. She stopped because of Covid and in her mid 50s discovered her hair is completely white. It looks amazing!

I agree. For that reason I've stopped even tinting my hair as it never seemed to compliment my skin tone. I don't even think about it anymore.