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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Ihatethistimeline · 13/02/2026 11:45

I also think it’s strange this thread is only 2 pages long. If it had a trans angle it would be 20 pages within hours. Is trans the only feminist issue currently?

Ihatethistimeline · 13/02/2026 11:40

These freaks all read from the same playbook drafted by the assorted peado’s, nihilists, misogynists and billionaire Bond villains at Epstein’s depraved sewer of a compound.

I wish PP would not attempt to sane wash his talking points. I don’t know a single woman who didn’t know fertility reduces as you age.

cardibach · 12/02/2026 21:33

AppropriateAdult · 12/02/2026 21:21

But by that logic any political discussion of family planning, population demographics or public service provision would be off-limits as being creepy and sexual, given it all eventually comes back to procreation. It’s nonsense. There are plenty of good reasons to be critical of Reform without resorting to the TRA-like argument of “Why are you so interested in children‘s genitals?”

‘Little girls’ is the issue. Discussing adult women’s contraception/fertility is different.

Airyfaerie · 12/02/2026 21:29

Crazy how men have been awful to women throughout all of history, and now they wonder why we don't want to have kids with them 😂

Yes, it's mysogynistic and creepy. No woman in an educated society needs it mansplaining to them that they can't have kids past a certain age 🙄

AppropriateAdult · 12/02/2026 21:21

cardibach · 12/02/2026 18:00

It’s discussing the outcome of their sex lives. Sex and pregnancy are a bit linked.

But by that logic any political discussion of family planning, population demographics or public service provision would be off-limits as being creepy and sexual, given it all eventually comes back to procreation. It’s nonsense. There are plenty of good reasons to be critical of Reform without resorting to the TRA-like argument of “Why are you so interested in children‘s genitals?”

JoyOfSpecs · 12/02/2026 21:11

Matt Goodwin didn't have his first and only child until he was 40.

He's 44 and divorced now. He's not even replaced himself

MissSpindle · 12/02/2026 19:33

StripyHorse · 12/02/2026 19:27

Hang on, we need more children? I thought Britain was supposed to be full?!

YANBU OP, their desire to reduce women to procreation machines is very Handmaid's Tale. I really worry about what will happen if Reform get in.

It's too full of brown children in their eyes and not enough white children. This line of thinking from them is really just another dogwhistle.

StripyHorse · 12/02/2026 19:27

Hang on, we need more children? I thought Britain was supposed to be full?!

YANBU OP, their desire to reduce women to procreation machines is very Handmaid's Tale. I really worry about what will happen if Reform get in.

UnhappyHobbit · 12/02/2026 19:07

That is barmy. Taxing women who don’t have kids? What about men?
Childless women surely are literally not taking anything from the system. No child benefit, no school places and the nhs benefits too as they haven’t gone through maternity care and are not adding any kids to the system. I guess they’re desperate for the next generation of tax payers but this makes no sense.

MissSpindle · 12/02/2026 18:30

LightningMode · 12/02/2026 17:15

I'm not seeing the problem? There is no harm in ointing out to girls and young women that their fertility rates change with age. I was of a generation who were constantly told not to get pregnant, that it would ruin our lives, and then we did start trying, in our thirties, our fertility rates had lessened.

But we all know this. We have it drummed into us from an early age. We don't need some creepy man mansplaining our fertility to us.

StormyLandCloud · 12/02/2026 18:29

I think it’s very controlling and frankly concerning - I watched a film recently called The Anniversary which feels hauntingly familiar ….. far right wing is a dreadful place to go back to IMO

Allusernamesaretakendammit · 12/02/2026 18:18

SerendipityJane · 12/02/2026 17:12

Sorry, but men discussing young girls sexually should never be part of any politics anywhere. Except to flush out the filth.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/politics/reform-matt-goodwin-gorton-denton-children-women-b2918340.html

More than creeped out, disgusted! Where do you even start with this absolute tripe? Decisions about children dont happen in a vacuum, and are not limited to women. Old white cis men telling us what to do with our bodies, it was ever thus.

StickySeason · 12/02/2026 18:16

If they were taxing all childless people I would still find it controlling and interfering, but to focus solely on women stinks heavily of the need to control women’s bodies, and we can rightly assume we’re seen solely as a walking uterus rather than a fellow human being with our own needs.

I also question the thinking behind it from another view. Over the last few years, I’ve seen opinions on social media from MAGA supporters basically saying that white American women need to start having more white babies to counteract against the influx of black babies being born in the US. Given the race-baiting in the UK currently with regards to migrants, it wouldn’t surprise me if this wasn’t part of/the agenda.

potpourree · 12/02/2026 18:12

LadyCrustybread · 12/02/2026 17:26

That universities are now too politically correct because they’re filled with childless women, that a negative child benefits (childlessness tax) should be imposed and that people who agree with trigger warnings and other political correctness have ‘female temprements’ and that British women are having children too late.

The usual cool, logical sanity, then...!

Happyjoe · 12/02/2026 18:10

Reform can F-off. F-off over women, F-off over all their crackpot ideas.

Yes OP, it's creepy.

cardibach · 12/02/2026 18:00

AppropriateAdult · 12/02/2026 17:39

I don’t agree with Reform’s agenda here, but it’s hard to see how you could legitimately describe this as “discussing young girls sexually”.

It’s discussing the outcome of their sex lives. Sex and pregnancy are a bit linked.

cardibach · 12/02/2026 17:59

fartoomuchtoblerone · 12/02/2026 17:38

I’m not creeped out but I’m not surprised to see Reform politicians blaming women for demographic change. Let’s ignore all the elements of the system that are contributing to people having kids later - housing costs, job insecurity, the ridiculously unequal divisions of labour in households with children that many women see and understandably are put off by. What we need is to be lecturing teenage girls telling them to get knocked up for their country, right?

I’m pretty creeped out by grown men being interested in ‘young girls’ and their sex lives…

  • [Post edited by MNHQ - the poster has explained later on the thread that this was an unfortunate typo]
SerendipityJane · 12/02/2026 17:57

Also we need to get rid of this idea that the world is 'over populated'. People are dying all the time. We don't know when another natural disaster is going to occur and wipe out hundreds of thousands. We need more people, not less.

Even were 1 in 2 to perish overnight, we'd still be left with 4 billion souls. I don't think human extinction is quite as close as you think.

OP posts:
GreenCandleWax · 12/02/2026 17:54

LightningMode · 12/02/2026 17:15

I'm not seeing the problem? There is no harm in ointing out to girls and young women that their fertility rates change with age. I was of a generation who were constantly told not to get pregnant, that it would ruin our lives, and then we did start trying, in our thirties, our fertility rates had lessened.

But this is part of a wider political and social agenda to go back to "traditional" gender norms, ie, women should stay home and have babies, and leave the world outside the home to men. This trend is quite strong in the US and goes along with support for Trump.

GentleSheep · 12/02/2026 17:51

Women in this country do need to be having more children BUT, and it's a huge but, other things need to be in place for this to happen. Men need to actually start behaving maturely and carrying equal weight in raising children. There are far too many men who aren't ready for relationships or behave very badly in them. Women are understandably going to be reluctant to want or have children in such a relationship, if they aren't confident that their children will have a good father who sticks around and carries his weight.

The other thing is of course finances - it's expensive to have kids and more support needs to be given if women are to take the time to have and raise children.

Also we need to get rid of this idea that the world is 'over populated'. People are dying all the time. We don't know when another natural disaster is going to occur and wipe out hundreds of thousands. We need more people, not less.

That's my two-penneth!

Conkersinautumn · 12/02/2026 17:49

Pistachiocake · 12/02/2026 17:29

Agree. Sure, we all know people who have babies in their 40s/beyond (including some of the best parents I've met), but the sad truth is a lot of us have issues at an older age. It is not creepy to point this out.
I actually wish we had a lot more education about our bodies. More info about periods, and problems that shouldn't be ignored. Childbirth, and choice. Peri and menopause might (just recently) have been all over the news, but there was a poster the other day who said her gynae had no interest in HRT-all doctors, and everyone for that matter, should have a working understanding of things that affect half the population. We now talk about mental health-great. Let's talk about physical health, with no stigma about "women's issues".

I'm in my 50s, chose to have a child in my 30s and then 40s. I did have plenty of awareness about fertility etc. This isn't secret information? Taxing WOMEN for not having children young, why on earth would anyone be wackadoodle to think this isn't anything other than government control of wombs.

Also, how do you impose a childless tax? Retrospectively at retirement age? Or just tax women from 18 until they have children (but not men?!)

Parsleyforme · 12/02/2026 17:46

I actually wouldn’t mind being offered free egg freezing but in my mid 30s I am probably already too old for them to consider

SquirrelSoShiny · 12/02/2026 17:45

fartoomuchtoblerone · 12/02/2026 17:38

I’m not creeped out but I’m not surprised to see Reform politicians blaming women for demographic change. Let’s ignore all the elements of the system that are contributing to people having kids later - housing costs, job insecurity, the ridiculously unequal divisions of labour in households with children that many women see and understandably are put off by. What we need is to be lecturing teenage girls telling them to get knocked up for their country, right?

This. Generally at the minute if I was a teenage girl in 2026, I would be seeking relationships with other teenage girls. 50% of teenage boys appear to be addicted to porn, gaming or weed or a combination of all three. 50% is a kind estimate.

Parsleyforme · 12/02/2026 17:43

I was never specifically taught about fertility but have felt the ticking of the clock for years. It is not due to ignorance that women are having children later, it’s many reasons including lack of good viable fathers, cost, ability to do well in our careers but only if we don’t take several years off, can’t afford to buy a house or get married, poor maternity care etc. etc. Do they think everything has been solved by funded hours?

AppropriateAdult · 12/02/2026 17:39

I don’t agree with Reform’s agenda here, but it’s hard to see how you could legitimately describe this as “discussing young girls sexually”.