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AIBU?

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To think the most shocking thing about James VDB's death is...

257 replies

Hitthebestbooth · 12/02/2026 08:39

...that a famous actor, recognised worldwide for his role in Dawson's Creek (putting this in the first lines for the benefit of MNetters who love to comment 'who??' on these threads) struggled to pay for his cancer treatment? His death has left his family 'out of funds'.

Now, James Van der Beek had enough fame and affection from fans that a Go Fund Me has raised a lot to support his family already. But there must be countless families across America who are ruined by medical bills - if Dawson couldn't pay for his cancer treatment, how do non-famous people in ordinary jobs cope? What do their families do after they've been crippled by the costs and still lose their loved one along with their homes and security for their children?

As a millennial, I was so sad to read of James' death. I loved Dawson's Creek. But it makes me very afraid for a future where Farage gets his hands on the NHS and we find ourselves in this position too. I have plenty of bad experiences with our healthcare system and am not saying it's perfect. But if I or my husband are diagnosed with cancer tomorrow, we won't have to sell our possessions or ask friends and family for money or risk leaving our kids with no home after treatment costs. There are plenty of wealthy people out there eager to take the NHS apart and sell it off, and for all people say we'd get a European system and it would be improved, it seems far more likely that capitalist greed will win out and we'll actually get an American model.

James Van der Beek's death highlights just how ruinous that model is. He spent his illness selling off memorabilia and trying to raise money. He died knowing his family's finances were left decimated. And he was someone with more resources than most. It's a sobering indictment of how bad things can get, and I am truly afraid that a Reform government would put us all in that dystopian scenario.

There are all kinds of options I could put for a poll but I'm just trying to make it really simple.

YABU - US healthcare is fine
YANBU - US healthcare is a terrifying prospect

OP posts:
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PrizedPickledPopcorn · 12/02/2026 09:00

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 08:47

It is shocking. One of my favourite things about Angela Landsbury is she used to create guest roles for older and out of work actors on Murder She Wrote so their medical insurance continued to be valid.

Gosh that’s wonderful! I didn’t know!

The American system is poor, but so is the NHS. There are better systems than either.

OvernightBloats · 12/02/2026 09:00

What type of insurance did he have? America is a cruel place if you are unable to afford a comprehensive insurance policy.

Very sad for his family.

LesserSootyOwl · 12/02/2026 08:57

YANBU to be against the US system, but YABU to think that the NHS is the best alternative. I would support a European model which offers better outcomes than the NHS in its current state.

Hitthebestbooth · 12/02/2026 08:55

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 12/02/2026 08:46

Well as a widow most men in their 40s who die, die knowing that their families finances are going to now be difficult. The average family can’t sustain a death. I was always independent and on a good wage but for the first time had to get into debt when he died and am only now 7 years after coming out of it.

Obvs I can’t comment about the costs of care it was ofc free on the nhs. I did notice he had done a lot of healthcare ads so either he received payment or got some treatment free so his job / name allowed him to get that rather than Joe Public who wouldn’t have had that opp.

You are right to point out in your post about the ace age person. I can’t stand all this “oh look a famous person has died”‘when there are hundreds of normal men/ women/ families in that same situation.

I have much sympathy for his wife though. All those kids navigating grief she’s going to need her armour on.

So sorry for your loss, and yes of course you're right that if someone dies in their 40s then along with the devastating emotional loss, it is also a financial problem. I just mean how much worse that financial issue would be if the family had been forced to pay vast sums of money for treatment first. From the reporting of James VDB's death, they had to spend all their savings on healthcare and so his widow is left not only without his earning power but with their finances already ravaged before he even died.

OP posts:
pinkmustard · 12/02/2026 08:54

Me and my husband have really comprehensive life insurance policies and thank goodness as the critical illness payout when I had cancer helped enormously. I was so lucky to not have to worry about medical bills. Cancer is so stressful, so upsetting, I cannot imagine what it’s like to have to then have to worry about essentially going bankrupt to pay for your ongoing care. The US system is awful.

Ginmonkeyagain · 12/02/2026 08:47

It is shocking. One of my favourite things about Angela Landsbury is she used to create guest roles for older and out of work actors on Murder She Wrote so their medical insurance continued to be valid.

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 12/02/2026 08:46

Well as a widow most men in their 40s who die, die knowing that their families finances are going to now be difficult. The average family can’t sustain a death. I was always independent and on a good wage but for the first time had to get into debt when he died and am only now 7 years after coming out of it.

Obvs I can’t comment about the costs of care it was ofc free on the nhs. I did notice he had done a lot of healthcare ads so either he received payment or got some treatment free so his job / name allowed him to get that rather than Joe Public who wouldn’t have had that opp.

You are right to point out in your post about the ace age person. I can’t stand all this “oh look a famous person has died”‘when there are hundreds of normal men/ women/ families in that same situation.

I have much sympathy for his wife though. All those kids navigating grief she’s going to need her armour on.