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Is the only way to give up my sitting room?

211 replies

Watdidusay · 11/02/2026 16:30

Sister is abroad and has long covid. Moved over to an EU country for work 4 years ago and has been ill for nearly 2 years. Unable to work and ineligible for benefits in that country. Lost job and decided she has to come home for support.

Unfortunately there isn't a place for her to stay long term aside from my open plan sitting room diner on the sofa.

She will probably need to go on benefits for a while and will need to pass habitual residence etc. The problem is it looks like she will either need to be "street homeless" and be put up in a hostel or sleep on my sofa and basically take over my small home which is already crowded. We were hoping that my mum (who's in supported living) acting as a solid guarantor would help her get a private rental but I'm reading that won't be enough. I've even been told she won't be able to get a room in a house share.

AIBU to feel like this is horrendous? We've all always worked until my sister got unwell.

OP posts:
ToeSucker · 12/02/2026 12:58

Verytall · 12/02/2026 12:55

Op are you sure about her not being able to get a tenancy/house share because she won't have UC at the point of applying, or are you taking that a bit literally?
I know it's dependant on her passing HRT and getting sickness benefits. But if she does get those, she'll be in the same boat as anyone else getting their first tenancy/houseshare - she finds a LL who will take someone on who is on benefits, shows them proof of her (living) UC award, they know from that she'll be eligible to receive a housing element, they do the claim with her as soon as the tenancy is signed. They accept that as proof of income essentially.

She'll have a better chance if family can help her with first months rent so that the LL isn't being paid in arrears, and finding a LL who accepts UC isn't easy, though the council may have links with some.

problem is the change coming in in may so they can't discriminate based on UC anymore - the list will be obsolete

Verytall · 12/02/2026 12:55

Op are you sure about her not being able to get a tenancy/house share because she won't have UC at the point of applying, or are you taking that a bit literally?
I know it's dependant on her passing HRT and getting sickness benefits. But if she does get those, she'll be in the same boat as anyone else getting their first tenancy/houseshare - she finds a LL who will take someone on who is on benefits, shows them proof of her (living) UC award, they know from that she'll be eligible to receive a housing element, they do the claim with her as soon as the tenancy is signed. They accept that as proof of income essentially.

She'll have a better chance if family can help her with first months rent so that the LL isn't being paid in arrears, and finding a LL who accepts UC isn't easy, though the council may have links with some.

CactusSwoonedEnding · 12/02/2026 12:43

Watdidusay · 12/02/2026 12:38

Sorry I think maybe other people misreading my post have conflated the message.

We WANT her in private accommodation. We are not seeking a council property as we know it would take years.

The problem is basic UC won't cover a tenancy and she can't get housing benefit until she is already on a tenancy. Hopefully she will be able to do SOME work in a year or so. But the system leaves us with only my sofa or an emergency hostel as options for perhaps years.

As I've said I am happy to have her stay here for a few months until she can get UC. but it will only be £396 a month and she will not be eligible for more unless she has a tenancy. Which she can't get on £396 a month.

Edited

But she will be entitled to housing benefit as a lodger (in the house of a non-relative, not you) - she may not start getting that for 3 months, can you/other family members scraoe together 3 months of rent for a lodger room?

Watdidusay · 12/02/2026 12:38

nOlives · 12/02/2026 11:40

She (or you) needs to look for a place as a lodger in the home of someone who is not a relative. Someone taking in a lodger will only need to check her pasport for immigration status and get permission from their mortgager or landlord to take a lodger. She can claim Housing Allowance with her UC as a lodger.

Lodging is cheaper and less secure than a tenancy but has fewer rules. Perhaps you could pay her rent till she can apply for UC.

As a single person without dependents or a disability she will not be a priority for the council to house. Even if she was they would be looking to help her find a room to rent privately whilst housing her in B&B for years.
Accept the private route. She will not get council housing.

Sorry I think maybe other people misreading my post have conflated the message.

We WANT her in private accommodation. We are not seeking a council property as we know it would take years.

The problem is basic UC won't cover a tenancy and she can't get housing benefit until she is already on a tenancy. Hopefully she will be able to do SOME work in a year or so. But the system leaves us with only my sofa or an emergency hostel as options for perhaps years.

As I've said I am happy to have her stay here for a few months until she can get UC. but it will only be £396 a month and she will not be eligible for more unless she has a tenancy. Which she can't get on £396 a month.

OP posts:
nOlives · 12/02/2026 11:40

She (or you) needs to look for a place as a lodger in the home of someone who is not a relative. Someone taking in a lodger will only need to check her pasport for immigration status and get permission from their mortgager or landlord to take a lodger. She can claim Housing Allowance with her UC as a lodger.

Lodging is cheaper and less secure than a tenancy but has fewer rules. Perhaps you could pay her rent till she can apply for UC.

As a single person without dependents or a disability she will not be a priority for the council to house. Even if she was they would be looking to help her find a room to rent privately whilst housing her in B&B for years.
Accept the private route. She will not get council housing.

Burningbud1981 · 12/02/2026 10:35

Nonsense10 · 12/02/2026 10:30

No I don't think I am, thank you. Once she can claim UC, she will need to get sick notes off her GP. Then go through an assessment, as I said. This woman clearly isn't able to work if she is sleeping 20 hours a day.

LCWRA is not guaranteed unless you can show me UC legislation that says it will be

Nonsense10 · 12/02/2026 10:30

Burningbud1981 · 12/02/2026 10:26

@Nonsense10 you are putting the cart before the horse. First of all OPs sister needs to pass the HRT. Second there is no guarantee of LCWRA. There are 3 outcomes after an assessment
LCWRA
LCW
found fit to work

No I don't think I am, thank you. Once she can claim UC, she will need to get sick notes off her GP. Then go through an assessment, as I said. This woman clearly isn't able to work if she is sleeping 20 hours a day.

Burningbud1981 · 12/02/2026 10:26

@Nonsense10 you are putting the cart before the horse. First of all OPs sister needs to pass the HRT. Second there is no guarantee of LCWRA. There are 3 outcomes after an assessment
LCWRA
LCW
found fit to work

Nonsense10 · 12/02/2026 10:18

Your sister needs to get a sick note off the GP and upload them to UC. She will eventually get LCWRA following an assessment.

It will be quite clear that she will be able to get housing allowance once she has applied for a house. I would suggest calling shelter and the council again, because it doesn't sound right that you have to prove all of that beforehand.

CountryGirlInTheCity · 12/02/2026 09:58

Hi OP, I don’t know what area you are in but in mine there are rental agents who work specifically with clients who are on UC/housing benefit. Your local council housing dept could tell you who they are. I know your sister can’t claim UC yet and it feels like you’re in a catch 22 situation because you need that for the tenancy etc but they will have come across this situation before and will likely be able to advise or may even have a landlord who will accept this situation. It may well be the case that a landlord will accept your sister once she is receiving UC. You can’t get the housing element until you have a rental agreement anyway and landlords know this and work with it all the time. No one gets their housing element agreed upfront, you have to get it once you’ve secured a rental.

Also, she needs to get registered at the council as being ‘at risk of homelessness’ because then she will get a housing officer who won’t do much tbh but will at least give her all the contacts she needs to get a private rental.

loislovesstewie · 12/02/2026 09:55

As @Burningbud1981 says the local authority will have no duty until she is habitually resident. Even then for the local authority to have a full housing duty to her she still has to be homeless, in priority need, unintentionally homeless with a local connection. Local authorities try to prevent homelessness wherever possible even if eligible.
I do mean this kindly (!), but please can people understand that being eligible,in other words being habitually resident is the key. It comes before every other consideration.

Burningbud1981 · 12/02/2026 09:46

@CactusSwoonedEnding Whether the council help or not has nothing to do if she has no other options. They have no legal obligation to help if -
she hasn’t passed the HRT
if she doesn’t have priority need

Watdidusay · 12/02/2026 09:36

TheClangyClunk · 12/02/2026 09:24

Is there a reason you're not considering the lodger idea, OP?

She doesn't have UC housing benefit as no tenancy. We will just have to see if anyone will take her without evidence of income.

OP posts:
CactusSwoonedEnding · 12/02/2026 09:34

The LA won't help her until she has no other options so to get her help you need to be tough. Allow her to come back and stay on your sofa for 10 days. Let her know in advance that you will be doing this, but on day 3, write a formal letter to her telling her that she must leave in 7 days time and that you will take legal steps to remove her from your property if she does not leave. That will be the evidence she needs to present as homeless and get a place in a hostel. Ideally she should also show them documentary evidence of her health condition - that isn't vital but may get her assessed for something better. The fact that she is physically present in your home and you are her sister is sufficient to establish a local connection that makes your LA responsible for her. You are very unlikely to actually have to throw her out onto the street but the LA will not do anything unless you are prepared to prove you will go that far.

Is the only way to give up my sitting room?
TheClangyClunk · 12/02/2026 09:24

Is there a reason you're not considering the lodger idea, OP?

Watdidusay · 12/02/2026 09:19

Goldfsh · 12/02/2026 09:12

Hmm very tricky. I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. Maybe give her my room and sleep in the living room for a bit? So she's more out of the way?

How sick is she? I had LC for four years and the first year was terrible, but it gradually improved and after 3 years I was a lot better. I was able to work from home for a few hours a week (self employed) and now I'm working almost full time.

However, even when I was bed bound for a lot of the time I was unable to claim PIP. That's because I was able to move around and cook for myself around 50% of the time, and I would do that day-on-day-off - but 50% of the time on my feet meant I was ineligible for PIP support. (It would have been easy to lie about this though - I just couldn't!)

Nuffield do a free long covid rehab programme that has very positive outcomes.

Sorry to hear you've been in a similar situation.

She wouldn't be eligible for pip until she's been here two years, so we're not looking at that right now.

OP posts:
StealthyHealthy · 12/02/2026 09:18

Contact adult social care. Explain the situation and if need be go to citizens Advice.

Her medical issues will give her high priority for council housing.

If she's too unwell to work (even a WFH computer based role?) then in time she'll have to claim benefits.

Goldfsh · 12/02/2026 09:12

Hmm very tricky. I'm not sure what I would do in your situation. Maybe give her my room and sleep in the living room for a bit? So she's more out of the way?

How sick is she? I had LC for four years and the first year was terrible, but it gradually improved and after 3 years I was a lot better. I was able to work from home for a few hours a week (self employed) and now I'm working almost full time.

However, even when I was bed bound for a lot of the time I was unable to claim PIP. That's because I was able to move around and cook for myself around 50% of the time, and I would do that day-on-day-off - but 50% of the time on my feet meant I was ineligible for PIP support. (It would have been easy to lie about this though - I just couldn't!)

Nuffield do a free long covid rehab programme that has very positive outcomes.

Soonenough · 12/02/2026 09:11

Can you put another single bed in your bedroom ? Isn't there an option to apply under the overcrowding issue . Or that you are asking her to leave because of it .

LadyLapsang · 12/02/2026 09:02

Depending on where you live and the cost of rentals locally, she could be placed some distance away. Some London councils are placing people out of London in cheaper rental areas. Can the wider family club together to find her a modest but safe place within the financial limits of what the local council will pay for a single person local to you so you can provide her with some support? If she is aged 55 plus she may be eligible for some age restricted housing / almshouses..

Itsnotallaboutyoulikeyouthink · 12/02/2026 08:52

I mean if you have a good relationship with her I would feel inclined to house her. It’s not like her situation is intentional.

think outside the box- can you all live together somewhere larger. Your sister, mum and you. How poorly is she? Would she be able to support you in any way non financially in the house? Is there any working at home role she could manage so she could contribute/ get back in her feet.

crowsfeet57 · 12/02/2026 08:40

greencheetah · 11/02/2026 16:40

No. If you put her up how will she claim homelessness?

She can still be homeless if someone is putting her up. She doesn't need to be street homeless.

Watdidusay · 12/02/2026 08:40

Threewordsspecial · 12/02/2026 03:46

Sorry about this. Thought I read that your sister had a good job and saved to buy a property? Can’t she just buy now? Sorrry if missed something.

also if stays in bed 20 hours on some days abs is ‘unwell’ can’t she go straight to hospital when she arrives and present herself homeless from hospital bed or upon discharge? Sorry if I again missed something. You say she attempted to go back to work 3 x but also it sounds like she really is unwell? How is she planning g in looking die work / job seeking when unwell.

Q to those who work in this field: where have I read a returning uk citizen needs to be here for 2 years to qualify for housing ?!

She ate through those savings while not working.

She has long covid and they cannot find anything treatable so no role for hospital at this time.

OP posts:
PearTreeBoat · 12/02/2026 08:38

Watdidusay · 11/02/2026 17:17

After 3 months on my sofa she would be eligible for NHS, basic UC and potentially lcwra. Just not housing. Ever.

If your sister is a UK citizen from birth then she will be entitled to NHS support from the date she moves back. I know this as a fact as I was living abroad for 12 years and returned to the UK to live 4 weeks ago.

I had to register on the Gov.uk website, using my passport to prove my identity and citizenship, once registered on there you can register with a GP. My GP was also able to send me my NHS number as I had forgotten this over the years.

Regarding housing, I'm not sure why you both think she wouldn't be able to get so much as a room in a house share, as long as she has the money for the deposit and rent it shouldn't be a problem. My advice would be to look on local FB groups ect rather than going through an estate agent as then you don't have to pass credit checks. The laws around rentals are changing later this year which may mean its harder to find a rental but having just returned to the UK as a British citizen wouldn't make her ineligible to rent as long as she can afford it.

As far as benefits go, this may be a tad harder but as far as I know she just has to prove that she has returned to the UK permanently to be able to submit a claim for universal credit ect, she is best trying to speak to the CAB if possible, or try submitting a claim online as even if rejected she will then have an in to speak to someone about it.

SomeOtherUser · 12/02/2026 08:17

Between yourself, your mum and your sister, could you get a larger flat for yourself with more room for her, allowing her to stay for longer?

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