Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

College transport non existent

107 replies

Reallyneedsaholiday · 10/02/2026 12:12

Why is it so shit? DD goes to our “local” college. 18 miles away. Minimum 3 buses or bus, train, bus and 15 minute walk. Minimum 2 1/2 hours to get there. When she signed up, in September, there was a direct bus, albeit meandering, which took an hour and a half, running once a day (7am) to college and then once a day leaving college at 5pm (home at 7pm). That lasted until October, when they cancelled it. Now, she needs to leave the house at 6.30 and doesn’t get home until 8pm, when the buses are running properly. This morning, she’s just come home after leaving at 6.30, still not even having made it there, due to bus cancellations and diversions (in case of scepticism she has photos of the bus stop signs saying “cancelled”) So that was £12 down the drain for transport costs to nowhere. I can’t take her myself, as I don’t have a car. I really don’t know what to do anymore. She’s unmotivated to even try and get there anymore (don’t really blame her). She’s missed quite a bit (although her attendance isn’t the worst in the group). If she leaves, I could be fined and would lose all child benefit, child maintenance etc. without qualifications it’s really hard to get a job. We don’t live “in the back of beyond” but in a reasonable sized and growing town. AIBU to think that a reasonable standard of (affordable and efficient) public transport should be available for college, especially given that it is a legal requirement to remain in education until 18?

OP posts:
sittingonabeach · 13/02/2026 16:43

Depending where you live a 6th form college can cover a huge catchment area. Just been researching one that has students coming from 4 counties and over 10,000 students. All these students can’t live in the town where the college is situated

sittingonabeach · 13/02/2026 16:40

@DaisyChain505 OP doesn’t live in the middle of nowhere, she lives in a town which did have a bus service to the college.

ItsNotMeEither · 13/02/2026 16:40

I'm not in the UK, but would an electric bike or electric scooter be an option? Where I live a lot of younger people ride those with a backpack on for school.

I know you mentioned the motorway, but surely there are some side roads if the original bus was meandering everywhere as you said.

DaisyChain505 · 13/02/2026 16:34

YABU for living in the middle of no where without think ahead to where your kids would go for their education.

Not driving yourself when you live so far away from everything isn’t fair on anyone in your family.

When I was in college I had a part time job and as soon as I turned 17 I was paying for my own driving lessons and saving for a car but I’m guessing because of where you live even this would be difficult for your daughter.

Can you relocate to a more ideal area with better connections to make life easier for everyone?

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:32

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:28

Because you bit her head off for an innocuous question and accused her of making an assumption, when it wasn’t even an assumption.

Let’s agree to disagree

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:28

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:26

But who says I’m so annoyed? Or are you making an assumption?

Because you bit her head off for an innocuous question and accused her of making an assumption, when it wasn’t even an assumption.

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:26

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:25

But why are you so annoyed at someone just asking the question?

But who says I’m so annoyed? Or are you making an assumption?

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:25

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:24

If it was OP would not have come here to ask for other options.

But why are you so annoyed at someone just asking the question?

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:24

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:22

So who do you think is paying the child maintenance that OP receives?

It’s a perfectly valid question.

If it was OP would not have come here to ask for other options.

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:22

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:20

Because this particular question is?

So who do you think is paying the child maintenance that OP receives?

It’s a perfectly valid question.

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 16:20

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:17

Why do you think questions are assumptions?

Because this particular question is?

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:17

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 14:53

Which part of the information shared by OP did you use to make the assumption that a father was available for the daughter to move in with who lived an easy distance to the college? I must have missed it.

Why do you think questions are assumptions?

nomas · 13/02/2026 16:16

Can you not afford a cheap car? My car is worth £800 and insurance is £250 per year. It’s worth it and I would sacrifice holidays, Christmas or anything like that for it.

sittingonabeach · 13/02/2026 16:13

@Shittyyear2025 maybe she didn’t get the grades to stay on? Maybe the school 6th form didn’t cover the courses she needs for her uni course. Our local school sixth form offers a very limited range of subjects.

In another area you have to go between a number of schools to cover the range of A-levels, very few 16-19 students study in one school in that area if they want to do A-levels

Shittyyear2025 · 13/02/2026 16:07

if the DD doesn't want to do specific A-levels or the courses the 6th form college is offering, then she might not have any other choice.

But she's currently unable to access ANY subjects, so does she stay at college NOT doing the course she wants to, or stick to 6th form and do other subjects with the option to specialise at uni?

LoveWine123 · 13/02/2026 14:53

PrincessApples · 13/02/2026 14:00

Can she move in with her dad?

Which part of the information shared by OP did you use to make the assumption that a father was available for the daughter to move in with who lived an easy distance to the college? I must have missed it.

sittingonabeach · 13/02/2026 14:37

@Shittyyear2025 if the DD doesn't want to do specific A-levels or the courses the 6th form college is offering, then she might not have any other choice.

In our county at least 3 school 6th forms have closed in the last couple of years

Don't live in Hampshire but the provision in this county seems pretty similar with a couple of large 6th form colleges and students having to travel a few hours a day to get to them. And there might have been a 6th form provision in the town you lived in, so not rural, but that has now closed when your DC are now 16-19

sittingonabeach · 13/02/2026 14:32

Many school 6th forms are closing as can't compete with shiny big colleges who can offer all different qualifications, so this is going to become an even bigger problem as more students will have to travel greater distances.

Nourishinghandcream · 13/02/2026 14:27

Meadowfinch · 13/02/2026 13:43

....apart from being extremely dangerous, and unsuitable for snowy or icy days.

I know because I went to sixth form on a moped. I wouldn't want my child to do it.

It depends on your own attitude to risk and the independence wanted by your children.

Both my OH and I rode mopeds at 16 to enable us to get to work/college (many years before we met each other) and many of my friends were exactly the same (living rurally your options were very restricted) and yes, we rode in the cold, ice & snow.
There were a few who were denied this option by their parents (same old story.... too dangerous) which meant they either (if lucky) had to suffer very long commutes by public transport or the parents took them. If these options were not available to them they simply missed out on the young adult opportunities that we had.

Shittyyear2025 · 13/02/2026 14:26

So there's a VERY local 6th form attached to the school she's been going to for 5 years, but instead she's decided to go to a college that is practically impossible to get to, at a cost of £12 a day (£2300 a year just to get to college?!?)

My DD went to college rather than 6th form, over 20 miles away. Difference being they had subsidised transport provided by the college. Took 90 mins each way but doable as she went with some friends from school and soon made new ones en route.

Can she go back to 6th form? College just isn't going to work is it?

ShetlandishMum · 13/02/2026 14:16

suburberphobe · 10/02/2026 19:28

I don't understand living in the middle of nowhere with kids and no transport options for them as they start to go to college/jobs.

I'm lucky to live in a great city with great public transport. Solo mum, took me to work and DS to school and uni.

I don't drive or have a car so - cheaper.

You could a few decades ago live outside cities and have good connections.
Today I wouldn't settle rural. You sign up to ferry children for years and buy them a car at 18 yo.
But we could have a quite big house and a big garden for the £ we have given for a flat next to a train and coach station. Can't have both I suppose.

Nourishinghandcream · 13/02/2026 14:10

Reallyneedsaholiday · 13/02/2026 13:52

I don't think mopeds are allowed on motorways, are they?

Mopeds and learners are not allowed on motorways.
How old is she?
If 17, could do a 5-day intensive course (longer ones are available if required) and walk away with a full license.

PrincessApples · 13/02/2026 14:00

Can she move in with her dad?

Harrietsaunt · 13/02/2026 13:55

Well if it no longer works, can they transfer back to school sixth form?

Treylime · 13/02/2026 13:53

We had the same problem about getting my dc to the nearest 6th form (8 miles away very rural). DS1 used a private minibus that had been running for years. Just before DS2 started the owners of the minibus decided to retire. Luckily some parents stepped up and spoke to coach companies and arranged for a coach service to take over the route. The school were no use and left it to the parents to sort.

Swipe left for the next trending thread