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Original poster

4 year old never gets award

139 replies

DesperateDad80 · 09/02/2026 20:47

I just wanted to get others' thoughts. My DD is in reception and every Friday her school's weekly newsletter includes 3 awards per year group: perseverance, kindness and work of the week. We are now week 17, so there have been 51 awards handed out since September for her class of 30. My DD is yet to get a single one whereas lots of other children have received 2 or 3 by now. To make things worse, I think I've discovered that every Friday, these awards might be celebrated in a whole school assembly which would mean my DD has now sat through 17 assemblies without a mention. I am completely gutted and fed up with the sinking feeling I get every Friday when I check the newsletter again to see her overlooked. Her only school report this year was absolutely fine. Am I overreacting? Surely, when in reception, children shouldn't be left behind like this unless she's completely awful.

OP posts:
Original poster
DesperateDad80 · 09/02/2026 21:03

birdling · 09/02/2026 21:01

I always keep a record of the awards I give out and no one gets a second one if anyone hasn't had one yet.
This does seem really unfair. There is always something good you can find to say about every child.
I would definitely check, perhaps in a 'I just wondered what X needs to do better in order to get the award?'

Thank you. I did get in contact just before Xmas asking if there was anything we could do at home. Just got the usual, she's doing fine reply.

OP posts:
birdling · 09/02/2026 21:01

I always keep a record of the awards I give out and no one gets a second one if anyone hasn't had one yet.
This does seem really unfair. There is always something good you can find to say about every child.
I would definitely check, perhaps in a 'I just wondered what X needs to do better in order to get the award?'

TY78910 · 09/02/2026 21:00

That’s interesting. When DS was in reception they always had star of the week and every kid got one by the end of the year. They always find a reason (good reading, phonics whatever) and a kid may well have been the last to get one at the end of the year but they were very clear that everyone gets one as it’s to incite kids to do good.

Original poster
DesperateDad80 · 09/02/2026 21:00

Namenamchange · 09/02/2026 20:54

Tell the teacher. The quiet, conforming children often get overlook.

I don't know how quiet she is. She's cheeky as you like at home but I know she can be quite shy in public.

OP posts:
Mishmosher · 09/02/2026 20:57

It’s usually just the violent kids who managed to resist the urge to beat up their classmates that get awards in my kids class. I’d be really chuffed if my child never got one. It’s a sign of great parenting.

Original poster
DesperateDad80 · 09/02/2026 20:55

Barrellturn · 09/02/2026 20:51

Just mention it to the teachers when she's out of earshot. It's probably on rotation but children can be missed especially if they are quiet and get on with things.

Had a chat not that long back and seems to have fallen on deaf ears so not on rotation. Thought at that age there might be a little more thought. She's quite a cheeky thing but the staff at her after school club think the world of her.

OP posts:
Tutorpuzzle · 09/02/2026 20:55

Get used to it. The children who just quietly get on with life and learning are generally at the back of the queue for awards.

(I work in many schools as a supply teacher and see it over and over again.)

Namechangerage · 09/02/2026 20:54

YANBU. Say there are 90 in the year and 151 awards have been given out. I would expect most children to have had at least one.

Namenamchange · 09/02/2026 20:54

Tell the teacher. The quiet, conforming children often get overlook.

Original poster
DesperateDad80 · 09/02/2026 20:53

Neodymium · 09/02/2026 20:49

You said 3 awards per year group and then her class is 30. How many classes are there?

It's a single entry school. Every week, 3 children from her class of 30 get an award. Same applies for all classes up to year 7.

OP posts:
Vaxtable · 09/02/2026 20:53

Neodymium · 09/02/2026 20:49

You said 3 awards per year group and then her class is 30. How many classes are there?

I read it as one class per year

Barrellturn · 09/02/2026 20:51

Just mention it to the teachers when she's out of earshot. It's probably on rotation but children can be missed especially if they are quiet and get on with things.

Isit2026yet · 09/02/2026 20:49

@DesperateDad80 you are overreacting. She’s 4, there’s plenty of time for her to get awards, win races, get trophies etc.

Neodymium · 09/02/2026 20:49

You said 3 awards per year group and then her class is 30. How many classes are there?