Mother made a comment on new partner

This sounds like my sister.
new bf was a twat. We all told her. She didn’t listen because she was madly in love, learned the hard way.

unless your mum has previous for being over opinionated, I would listen to her. Mums usually have your best interests at heart.

I’m 53, and I certainly ‘day drink’ periodically, but it’s more likely to be with friends playing a traditional session in the afternoon in a pub, or if we have friends over for a late brunch that goes on.

OP has admitted it was her idea.

Unfunny as opposed to ... funny..
I'll be honest, on the rare occasions that I partake in a little day time drinking its just a relaxing drink spread out over the day with food often an activity is involved.
It's fun. I'm often home in bed at a reasonable time and hangover free the next day.
I don't get the problem or the age restriction.

Why is it him leading you astray and not you leading him astray? Are women not capable do they not use their own head?

Actually the young uns dont drink much these days
Its older people who do

I find the concept of day drinking really old fashioned, pints at 11am and pub crawls are the type of thing university students did 30 years ago .
Tbh I think its alcoholism dressed up as " fun" , how old is this man?
@Keola

How many people have an alcoholic drink at 6am in the airport bar before flying off to Lanzarote? Having an alcoholic drink at 11am before a football match isn't that bad.

It was my 44th birthday last weekend. Me and DH went to a bottomless brunch followed by an afternoon disco in a club. We were home by 10pm.

It was great fun! I’m a huge fan of day drinking! I can confirm neither of us as alcoholics.

Luncheon parties, BBQs, christenings, rugby matches, horse racing.I've been to a few of these over the decades. It's good fun and you're home at a decent hour.

I'm nearly 50 and can confirm it really can be very fun. You can have a great day out and be home Early enough so you get a good night's sleep and don't feel like shit in the morning.

You’d be okay with someone being 21 years,11 months 27 days, the cut off being writ large in stone?

I'm pretty shocked even by the expression "day drinking". How old are you? I can't imagine Nyone over the age of 22 being interested in that as an activity unless they were an alcoholic. Apart from anything, it sounds like the most unfunny thing in the world.

You've been squashed personality wise in a marriage perhaps. Now you're free it will be noticeable that you've blossomed. People can find that disconcerting.

Perfectly put.

Is your mum normally the troublemaking type? Or does she usually have your best interests at heart? If the latter then maybe you should listen to her, she may see danger for you? The word "explosive" sounds sus, and there are kids involved..

You’re tying yourself in knots trying to prove you haven’t done anything wrong, when the real issue is that your mum is anxious and hasn’t articulated why.

Nothing you’ve described is alarming. New relationship, a planned day out, child-free, a few drinks, home safely. Given what you’ve said about her drinking history, her discomfort around alcohol generally, and the way she applies different standards to you and your brother, this looks very much like projection. Stop internalising her unease as evidence that you’ve messed up.

If she has a concrete concern, she needs to articulate it. Is she worried about your kids? About frequency? About alcohol because of her own past? Does she simply not like the fact that you’re happier and changing? “I’m worried about you” without context is just nonsense. Have a direct conversation and her what, specifically, she thinks is the problem, and what she is actually afraid will happen. If she can’t answer that, then just disregard.

You’re allowed to be happy, to change and to enjoy yourself without it being pathologised, especially when your children are cared for and not involved.

I think I'd ask her now the weekend has passed,.what her concerns were and why she isn't keen on him?

If it was drink related those sound very much like issues related to her own relationship with alcohol.

If it's about the bloke you are seeing listen to her with an open mind.

Don’t be ridiculous! The occasional day out starting at 11am is nothing to stress about.

@Keolayou have my sympathies. When I met my DH my friends used to say things like this to me. The reality was my ex was not a sociable person and we hardly went out so when I found someone who was on my wavelength and was up for having fun with me they decided he was a bad influence.

yes, perspective is key here! 😁

Don’t be ridiculous - if you are going for a sporting day it’s normal

Ah but were you early or just really really late drinking at that time 🤔🤣

Oh the G&T on an early morning flight to the sunshine. I know I'm on holiday 😂

Not really if you're going out on a dayer