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AIBU?

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Original poster

Aibu for not having party for 5th birthday?

33 replies

Laurasanford789 · 09/02/2026 15:07

Might be a pointless post but I already feel so guilty about the fact I haven't organised a 5 year olds party but truth be told we have had a lot on including a loss, I haven't had the mental capacity to look into it and it's early march

We have agreed soft play and pizza with his younger sis and then family tea in afternoon just doesn't feel enough, I know there are years to come when I can do it but yeah, just feel shitty about it.

Has anyone else just had other plans other than parties for Thier young ones?

OP posts:
Catza · 09/02/2026 15:32

I managed to survive the entire childhood without having a big bash for my birthday and never felt deprived. Birthdays were family time, a few friends coming round for lunch in secondary school. It was really lovely, actually.

RedSpottyMushrooms · 09/02/2026 15:23

How does he feel about it?
Could you invite a friend to the soft play (if he'd like that)?

FrozenFebruary · 09/02/2026 15:17

Why can't he at least take a friend's soft play?

would he like a party?

they're only interested in traditional 'at home' type parties for such a short few years now I think it's a shame not to have them if they want them. They don't need to be expensive or a huge hassle ! You've definitely still got plenty of time.

NuffSaidSam · 09/02/2026 15:13

I'd invite a couple of his friends along to the softplay/pizza party of the day.

REDB99 · 09/02/2026 15:13

I’d organise something, it’s still a good couple of weeks away to give people notice. Sorry you’ve had a tough time but unless there’s real financial hardship your child shouldn’t not get a party due to adult problems.
Does he want a party? Does he understand why he isn’t getting one? Could you just invite a few friends to the soft play?

Sunshineismyfavourite · 09/02/2026 15:12

Don't beat yourself up. Sometimes life gets in the way of the best plans 😥 My DD had her birthday party cancelled after we suffered the loss of a close family member - I had no head space to organise things and with the funeral and everything - it was all too much. She's an adult now and remembers the loss but not really the lack of birthday party. I think she'd say we made up for it with all her other parties.

carnivalqueenthethird · 09/02/2026 15:11

My son turned 5 this weekend and I had the exact same thoughts as you, I was crying about it on Friday. However the weekend was fantastic. We took him to a show at the theatre and then out for lunch one day, and then on his actual birthday we arranged for him to meet one friend at a soft play as a surprise and then had family round in the afternoon for a presents etc. I made an extra effort to decorate my house to make it feel really special. Everything we did cost less than half of a party. I don’t regret it now at all.

Ketryne · 09/02/2026 15:10

We did a big party for my DS for his 4th, but this year we’re giving him a choice between a party and a day out. It’s a few months away yet but so far he’s adamant he wants to go to the science museum 🤷‍♀️ (I was going to offer Legoland but ok!)

I sometimes think kids that age like attending parties more than they like being the centre of one.