To bring up a colleagues sexual assault at work

Definitely mention it: "I saw that thing in the paper. You are fantastic. Thank you"

Having also been the victim of S.A. I would feel encouraged if I had done what she did and someone saying “I’m sorry that happened to you” is totally appropriate.

you don’t speak for all S.A. victims

Just saw your update and that you did indeed call her brave so disregard my advice but for future it’s worth knowing that it’s not a term that everyone likes.

I’ve been in a similar situation to your colleague and my advice would be to say something about admiring what she’s doing but to avoid saying she’s ’brave’. That word has become quite loaded in certain contexts and can be interpreted as saying she’s doing something you yourself would never do. Like how some women will say (somewhat cattily with fake admiration) that someone is ‘brave’ for having a home birth.

Choosing to share her story doesn't mean that'll she'll be 'happy' for anyone to bring up what happened to her whenever the other person feels like it.

Really glad you followed your instinct on this one @Purplenote . Your words will mean a lot to her and she'll remember that.

You did the right thing.

I don't often comment but this situation is something I can give first hand experience of. If I were you I would say something to her, if it's been in the papers she will already know there's a chance people she knows will have seen it.

I was in this exact situation three years ago, I was featured in a national newspaper, strangers contacted me with words of support but also old friends who I'd lost touch with and it made me feel less alone. By contrast I heard nothing from my family members who I knew had seen it, months later we had a family event and two relatives approached me to question me about going public. That was it, no concern for me and I actually felt disgusted that they were choosing to gossip since I was in front of them but couldn't muster up the concern to send me a nice message when they first saw it.

I genuinely think coming forwards is such a lonely and isolating place with so much hatred experienced from the other side that any solidarity is so warmly received especially if it's sincere!

ETA: sorry I missed the update before posting but I'm really glad you spoke to her and can well believe it provided her comfort

Excellent, glad it all worked out.

Just reading this from the beginning and my instinct would definitely have been to acknowledge it, even if it was prefaced by please dont feel the need to respond if you don't want to talk about it. Otherwise its the same old 'let's ignore topics we arent comfortable with- death, sexual violence etc. She sounds like more than an acquaintance and she went public which means she feels a need for it to be out there. Really glad you were brave enough and she appreciated it.

I would message her privately on teams to acknowledge you saw it, you think she's brave etc and thank you for sharing. I shared something on a blog about a traumatic experience and it was really nice to receive kind messages from people to thank me for sharing or share that they had been through a similar experience. I also appreciated people acknowledging it in person. IT's really strange to pretend you haven't seen something that she has done that is so brave and deliberately visible.

Definately yes! She will feel really supported and seen. I would just say something like, ' I saw your article, that was really brave, I bet it's helped lots of women that you've spoken out'

🙄🙄🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

Is it the woman who was ignored by the police?

If so I would probably say something to support her bringing out into the public about the police's ineptness.

do I say to her "I'm was so sorry to read about what you experienced" or just keep my mouth shut?

The second one.

If she brings it up first, then you can talk about it.

This is exactly what I came to post. There's a big difference between "I'm sorry for what happened to you" and "I saw you on telly and I admire you for being so brave in making a stand". If you do choose to say anything then please go for something along the lines of the latter.

I wouldn’t mention it during the day, but I’d either try and catch her at the end, or send her a message afterwards to say I’d read it and was immensely impressed by her courage.

Not a clue…. Not seen owt on the news tbh

So what you are saying is your need to do 'something' is more important than her? If she hasn't mentioned it then it is none of your business it is not about you

Doing something because of how you feel isn't empathy. Empathy would be you trying to understand how she feels and respecting her wishes, and she hasn't mentioned the assault.
Like ThatLilacTiger said, she waived anonymity in spite of the fact people would bring it up in conversation, not because of it.

Im sure it's different for different people.

You think the op just happened to google her colleague during the week that she was all over the national news?

Some do apparently….

Empathy would be not mentioning it unless she mentions it first.