Husband told daughter to stop chewing so loudly in his ear

Yabu
You're making a fuss about nothing

At 11 she knows to chew with her mouth closed. Don't see the issue.

My DH is constantly telling our DC (7 and 10) to shut their mouths when they are chewing. No offence here. They need to learn it’s rude!

This seems like such a non event.

Teach them young! I'm team husband.

your daughter may have been offended but if she was chewing noisily then this is basic feedback that I would give my kids to help them fit in with society and avoid their friends taking the mick out it of them for it… was she offended because there was some truth in it? Not a big deal… your husband is allowed his sensitivities…

My daughter has misophonia which is basically sensory discomfort of other peoples eating sounds- she wears ear plugs when we eat dinner because of it and we play music in the background. It is worse when she is tired and she often says I am the worst one which does make me a little self conscious!!

Does your husband struggle with chewing noises a lot?

It was a bit harsh but she needs to learn loud chewing noises aren't really acceptable. And if her parents don't tell her who will.

This cannot be real?? Your husband was completely in the right telling her!

How is this relevant?

My child still eats loudly sometimes too. I have been teaching him not to since he was very little but I think it’s how everyone at his school eats so he’s forgetting/ not thinking it’s a big deal.

My dh also is quite intolerant to this and unlike me theres no ‘can you try to eat quieter ’, which I think is the problem here too.
They are too abrupt, forgetting their parental role is to teach, not berate.

In my case, what gets me is, my dh is actually sometimes a noisy eater too - he’s not aware all the time and he’s the grown up. Of course, nobody scalds him!

Is there perhaps more to this - do you often feel like husband is quite harsh or critical to the kids (or even you)? As a one off I’m sure it’s fine and she’ll get over it. But if this is just one example and you often feel like your husband can be regularly direct to the point of causing upset/shame, then you can of course bring it up with him and ask him to tone it down.

It amazes me what people ask on MN! 😂
Your DD is 11 years old , so old enough to know how to eat properly. Your DH did nothing wrong, he asked his child to stop chewing so loud, I would have done the same. What is the issue?

this has got to be a joke right? YABVU to be upset at the fact that your husband taught good manners to your child.

Dont you just love threads to wind everyone up that the OP does a total runner on.?
For what its worth, the issue isnt hubby telling her off, its the child being "offended". Another one that won't cope with school, exams, a job and just life in general, because of a molly coddling parent

This is so funny to me. I have 3 boys and misophonia - I cannot physically bear the sound of chewing and they know this mostly from the fact I can try and get through it and then hit a mental wall and usually screw "good god man your mouth noises are making me want to jump out of the window"

They are used to it by now and don't get offended- although my littlest son just says "close your earholes then mummy" haha

I would clean rip my ears off when they chew if I could. Or at the very least bleach my brain...

I would imagine its less embarrassing for her own parent to point out an unfortunate habit in the privacy of your car than for someone to point it out in front of her friendship group in the school canteen. She has time to change it. Slapping and claping your lips whilst chewing is horrible.

Team dad. I cannot stand loud chewing.
Children need to be parented, and if that offends them, then so be it.

Congrats on the new daughter OP. I saw previously you had all sons. But then you also couldn’t seem to remember if you’d been together 13 years or 15.

I don’t know if you’re changing details for anonymity, but probably wise to keep the changes the same across all threads. Also, it seems you have other issues going on. But you also said previously that you are a gentle parenting style person whereas your husband shouts a lot. That would suggest your husband is in the right on this occasion, of course kids need telling off sometimes. Now if he screamed and yelled at her in the back of the car, that’s different - but it would be about his style, not about him telling her off.

Has he got a new job yet, or is he the one mostly in charge of the kids? From your previous comments about your boys hating being left with him, I can imagine tensions are running high so this one thing is the latest in a list of things you don’t agree with.

I'm with DH - the sound of other people chewing makes me feel physically sick. It's really unpleasant & while I can't say something to randoms on the tube who are eating or chewing gum, I'd like to think I could to family.

He's a parent too and is as qualified as you to decide if she's chewing unnecessarily loudly or not. More qualified in this case as he was sitting next to her and you weren't.

If you think he's made a mistake and it's him being oversensitive to normal noise levels, have a quiet word with him when kids aren't around. He may have a different perspective.

I know I'm quite sensitive to noise so have a high threshold for complaining e.g. if I see one of the kids taking obviously too big mouthfuls or eating with their mouths open.

When they're older, people who aren't their parents probably won't tell them they're being a bit gross in their manners, if they are - they'll just avoid them because they're a bit gross. I'd rather we tell them.

At 11, she should really already know how to eat quietly with her mouth closed? I can’t bear people chewing their food (or gum! 😒) like a cow chewing grass! He’s trying to teach her manners in private before she makes a fool of herself in public, why would it upset you? If it upsets her, she won’t chew so loudly again, job done?

Oh man I want to live in a world where this
is all that’s troubling me…

YABU. I'm going to assume that if your DH could hear the chewing over the noise of the car/roads, then it was probably pretty loud.
Loud chewing/eating is horrible to listen to, especially if you can't remove yourself from the situation.

Complete over reaction...from you. Is she your little princess.

I would of said something too, I hate noisy chewing.

It's hardly something to be offended by. Doesn't seem like a big deal to me, unless there is a massive backstory coming.