Money for birthdays/Christmas... but hate shopping

I would just take a couple of weeks adding stuff to a shopping basket on JL or M&S site and then order and try on at home. I never go clothes shopping anymore. If in doubt, buy a pair of trainers of a bag that you love.

does it have to be clothes?
i bought a duvet cover with a gift card
could you buy books?
a plant?

Forgot to answer main point made by OP!

You don't have to physically go shopping. Shop online. Many shops allow free returns so you can order lots of things to try on/different styles/sizes and then send back what you don't like and get a refund.

Book a nice experience like a spa visit and your partner can look after the children. You then get a nice treatment, and some child free time to relax

I would probably buy adult Lego though. You can enjoy it when the children are in bed, and it will be a nice ornament when finished. There are lovely botanical ones.

I am confused by this.

Why would you lose money? Just pay for something you usually use your card for with cash, and make a mental note you have £100 to spend on a gift. Or transfer £100 into a spare bank account or savings account if you have a fast access one

Why don't you go to JL and get the advice of a personal shopper? You could get advice on a staple wardrobe and buy some of the pieces and save up for the rest

Or get your colours done, with your gifted money?

(You end up getting into a ridiculous guessing game about what they’d like, asking people close to them who also get it wrong.

If you give money, it’s up to them, imo.

It can be extremely difficult to choose clothing items for other people, especially if they are in a very different age group.

I’d be cross if I gave someone money and it ended up going on the electric bill . It’s for a gift , a treat , not household bills . OP just go to the high street and buy something you love .

Huh?

Or you can just spend the £100 on groceries or petrol and transfer the £100 not spent on those items into a separate account.

just pay it into the bank

The trouble with cash is it doesn't covert to online spending. £100 in an envelope does not always = £100 to spend online.

It's a pita tbh. It sounds very callous and ungrateful to say 'i'd prefer a bank transfer please', but in truth, wouldn't it be easier for everyone if that was the case.

Agree with saving it until you decide you want to buy/do something. I never understand why people say 'have money must spend it now' or 'if I don't buy something now, I'll spend it on something boring for the house'.

Don't you have a savings account of personal spending money for things you want? If not, open one now and put the money in, and next time you think 'I'd like to buy/do that', then you have the money for it.

And if you do want nice clothes and no opportunity to buy them, then unless you're a widow with no family support, look at how you can make time to go shopping or whatever else you choose to do.

Just put the money in a separate purse / wallet / envelope and you have it ready for when you fancy treating yourself to something but are hesitating to use the family budget.
You don't need to go out to specifically spend it within a certain number of days.

I used to use money to go out to a gig or a show at the theatre for example, which we couldn't really afford as a family when my dc were young - but you could use it for whatever is a treat for you as and when you have the time or opportunity. Don't "go on a shopping trip" just to use it up, especially as you hate shopping - where's the pleasure in that ?

Like PP suggests - treat yourself to some online shopping. It's tricky getting the time to get to the shops when you have young children. ..

Are there gaps in your wardrobe that you'd like to fill? How much is your birthday stash?

Alternatively I'd get one nice thing e.g a lovely coat, boots or handbag with it all - rather than lots of cheaper items.

Don't feel in a rush to spend it - take the time to get something you'd really like.

And maybe move it into a separate account (or take it out in cash) so you won't be tempted to spend it on bills!

You could always order online?

I don't like shopping either so any cash I recieve as a gift goes into an envelope and I am just saving it until there is something I really want. I forget about it most of the time so it is always a nice surprise when I rediscover it.