Do people just not ring each other any more, is this normal?

loooooooong texts or whatsapps

But what if you don't live close enough to meet face to face ?

I have just one friend that I speak to on the phone. The rest, strictly WhatsApp. I much prefer this, with face to face in between.

I am not ND and I agree with you.

this. Absolutely this.

I have three good friends (interestingly met on an internet forum !) in this country but miles apart, who I chat to a couple of times a month.

Yesterday I sent a Canadian friend a message about the Olympics via FB messages and asked if she used WhatsApp to phone but she said she and her family video chat via Facebook. I had a quick look and tried a contact. Long story short – we video chatted for two hours and had a lovely time. We introduced each other to our current cats and she said Hi to my husband. We’re going to try and do this once a month. We talked about family, homes, animals, politics, current affairs, Olympics, you name it. We last saw each other in the flesh 20 years ago and Skyped a couple of times but the connection wasn’t good. Facebook videocall was perfect, and free. I regret losing verbal contact with her but hope we're now back on track.

In my opinion, texts aren’t really communicating and e-mails are only one stage better. Voice notes are only a verbal text/e-mail.

You keep chatting OP ! 🤗

I love speaking on the phone to friends - especially long distance ones - we book in a chat and are usually blathering away for an hour - one in the US never fails to be a 2 hour chat. Our husbands are bemused. “What are you even talking about?”

I’ve lived in a few different places and phone calls are a great way to stay really in touch with far flung friends.

With other people it’s just quicker at work - the younger people at work will not get it through their heads that they need to build relationships with phone chats and arranging meetings is a LOT faster if you ring the PA for availability instead of typing out an email, sending it and having no idea how long you’ll wait for a reply which means availability will change if the assistant doesn’t see it in time.

Also - I can cook, I can walk the dogs, I can do the ironing, I can hop in the car while on the phone. If I’m texting, I can’t do all that practical stuff.

Hate talking on the phone. Love texting.
Hate voice notes and voice mails. I tell people please don't send them as I won't listen to them.

I’m 45 and much prefer texting. Been texting since I got my first phone at 18 so have definitely been texting more than half my life.

I'm 58. I have been texting since the late 1990s, so at least 25 years.

Things I find hard about phone (but disclosure I’m ND)…

• there is always a slight delay and I worry about talking over the other person.
• I can’t see facial expressions so find it had to gauge when it’s my turn to talk etc
• equally they can’t see me, and sometimes I worry that stuff I say won’t be interpreted correctly. Whereas I know I ca use certain emojis to indicate sarcasm, or humour.

I’ve been with my Dh for nearly 20 years and I can probably count on 2 hands the times I’ve spoken to him on the phone. Including the 2 years we were long distance on opposite sides of the world. 😂

For context I need to make a dentist appointment. I haven’t for almost 6 weeks now as it means calling (no online facility). I know it’s daft, I know I’m an adult etc. But I find it really hard.

We talk, so much nicer

I type really fast on my phone. It doesn’t take me twice as long. My mum texts with one finger on one hand and it takes her much longer.

I just asked my 20 something son what he feels about phonecalls and he said he really likes them. He listed off about half a dozen good friends he regularly chats to on the phone

Yes, I completely agree, you nailed it, texting is all those things;
INEFFICIENT, IMPERSONAL AND ISOLATING!

The worst is the inefficiency, as it takes hours to have what could be a two minute conversation.

I call whenever I can, and the timing allows (so will text if I think a friend is at work), for the efficiency and also to make it personal, as messages can often come across as perhaps a bit rude/abrupt in text but better nuanced in a voice conversation.

I feel slightly guilty if I opt to text when I could have called, as I feel I'm sending a vibe that I can't actually be bothered to talk to this person, so will just do a text instead.

My friends are like this, and I feel like you. It means I am in touch with several of them less. It's sad.

But equally, I know this is how it is now. So I try to meet up with people instead. And I'd never call without checking it's a good time.

I find phone calls imposing
I hate the surprise element

I message my friends and ask how they are and if they fancy a meet up. So we meet up and chat. I don't miss talking on the phone at all and I am mid fifties.

I'm 56 so hardly a young 'un and I didn't say I found it frightfully traumatic.

I'm in the please don't ever call me camp.

You seem almost personally offended by people not wanting to chat on the phone with you. Why does it rankle you so much? Do you see it as a personal social snub?

If you miss chatting to friends and family on the phone maybe you could ask if any of your friends also miss it? Maybe there's at least one of them that does also like to chat on the phone?

People can't be forced to chat on the phone but equally if that's how your friends feel you equally can't be forced to text constantly either if you hate that. It sounds like an incompatibility in terms of social communication.

You seem to think that just because someone doesn't like talking on the phone equates to not liking to talk to people. Not the case for me at least. I may not be the most sociable person in the world, like my own company but I really don't mind chatting to friends, family, neighbours etc etc face to face. I just don't like doing it over the phone, never have. Dislike voice notes too. Just annoying

I dumped a man once b/c he wanted to chat on the phone for ages. Frankly, would rather spend the time face to face and CBA with phone calls. I speak to my mother (would rather not), my sister when we have something to sort / say and texting is too complex, and sometimes DS who is away at uni. If I have an hour to chat shit, I would rather do it in person which is WAY more satisfying than talking on the phone.

You were not adressing that with me though. This was not mentioned until this last post.

Do what works for you and your friends. I will do what works for mine. However I stand by stating sometimes we have to do stuff that makes us uncomfortable