Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Regret causing a scene in Aldi

311 replies

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 16:51

I went to Aldi earlier. While I was scanning an item at the self checkout, the price was more expensive than the price on the sticker on the shelf. I asked the assistant if I could quickly go back to swap it. I was away for only about 2 minutes.

When I came back to the till, there was a man arguing with the assistant, saying she had to remove my items so he could use the till. I explained that the items were mine and that I had just gone back to swap something. He started shouting at me, saying I had “jumped the queue” and that I shouldn’t go to the till until I had finished my shopping.

I stayed quiet for a few moments. When he was in the queue, I approached him and pointed my finger, saying, “don’t fucking speak to me like that again, or at any woman.” He shouted at me in response, telling me not to point my finger or swear at him. I said, “You’ve chosen the wrong person to be rude to,” and went back to DD.

We finished paying at the same time, and he was walking close behind me, looking at me. I said, “I didn’t appreciate you shouting at me in front of my child.” He then said, “I’ll see you here at 4pm next Sunday.” I said I wasn't from the area so no chance and continued walking to my car.

As time has passed, I regret my actions and wish I had just stayed quiet.

OP posts:
PullTheBricksDown · 08/02/2026 17:39

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:35

No doubt she will be telling all her friends in school tomorrow how her mummy behaved in the supermarket 🤣🤣

Yes @Liiz92 I would go and listen to Harper Valley PTA 😎

Rasperry · 08/02/2026 17:39

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:38

He was probably shaking with laughter at what a total arse the OP made of herself.

I really don’t see how she made an area of herself, she was antagonised and didn’t sit there and take it.

Stressedoutmummyof3 · 08/02/2026 17:39

He sounds like a twat but you were rude swearing at him and pointing at him. Why did you need to swear? You could have said everything without swearing. And it is annoying when someone wanders off leaving their shopping.
On the other hand I don't think you need to worry about it. I'm sure he's not.

Rasperry · 08/02/2026 17:38

Gahr · 08/02/2026 17:29

I don't know. I think that using fowl language is better than chickening out!

OP, you did nothing wrong. Ok, so maybe the swearing wasn't ideal, but who cares! He was incredibly rude and he deserved a telling off.

Bravo!😂I cracked up

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:38

Rasperry · 08/02/2026 17:36

Don’t be silly. A swear word is just a word, he was nasty and aggressive to you and it was deserved.

He was probably shaking and heart pounding when you dared to challenge him, so well done.

Maybe next time he’ll think twice before bullying members of staff and women with their children!

Edited

He was probably shaking with laughter at what a total arse the OP made of herself.

aredrosegrewup · 08/02/2026 17:37

Gotmyoldshoeson · 08/02/2026 16:56

He was a twat.

Having said that two mins is a long time to be holding up a queue to be swapping something.

Personally if there were no staff to swap it, I’d have just left it.

Why should she leave it? This is the issue with the shops encouraging self-serve tills. There's only one member of staff who can't leave.

MassiveWordSalad · 08/02/2026 17:37

NotnowMildrid · 08/02/2026 17:32

Bravo, well done for teaching your 4 year old DD to swear at people in an argument.

Im sure OP will have explained to her DD that this was wrong and apologised 🙄 Unless the OP is dropping f-bombs into every other sentence every day I’m sure her daughter isn’t going to turn into Ray Winston.

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:37

MrsPinkSky · 08/02/2026 17:33

Everyone in supermarkets 'shouts' on Mumsnet.

Customers, cashiers, shelf stackers, customer service staff and trolley collectors 😁

I've yet to see a thread where someone said something annoying/nasty in a normal voice.

I have to disagree with you. People on Mumsnet don’t all shout - a significant proportion ‘scream’. 🤣🤣

ImPamDoove · 08/02/2026 17:37

Why did you go from zero to shouty aggressive loon? And what the fuck has ‘or any woman’ got to do with anything? I’m embarrassed for you. You’ve shown your daughter a terrible example of dealing with conflict and could’ve handled his reaction SO much better.

Rasperry · 08/02/2026 17:36

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 17:32

There were no other children around, and my DD is 9.
I’ve said it multiple times, but I feel really ashamed and awful, and I regret swearing.

Don’t be silly. A swear word is just a word, he was nasty and aggressive to you and it was deserved.

He was probably shaking and heart pounding when you dared to challenge him, so well done.

Maybe next time he’ll think twice before bullying members of staff and women with their children!

shuggles · 08/02/2026 17:36

@MassiveWordSalad The point is that some men will decide to bully a woman who is not a physical threat (unlike say, a huge bodybuilder) and socialised to be “nice” because they’re cowardly misogynists.

Do you never go outside..? The overwhelming majority of anger and aggression from men is directed towards other men, not women.

A huge bodybuilder is not a physical threat, because physical assault in a public place is illegal. What a bizarre way to think. That's like something from a school playground.

The physical threat in public comes from groups of yobs who have their faces covered and who are hunched over with their hands in their pockets. Because there's a group of them and they are likely to be armed with knives. Those are the people I avoid.

MrsPinkSky · 08/02/2026 17:35

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 17:32

There were no other children around, and my DD is 9.
I’ve said it multiple times, but I feel really ashamed and awful, and I regret swearing.

So what's the thread for?

Are you looking for other mums who are happy to swear in front of their children, to make you feel better?

How would them saying 'YANBU' change anything?

You did it, you can't change it so own it and move on 🤷‍♂️

rockingroller · 08/02/2026 17:35

He was in the wrong and it's great that you were not left shaken and intimidated. But waving your finger at him and swearing must have been unpleasant for DD to witness and wasn't necessary. I think you should resolve not to do it again unless you are actually being threatened.

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:35

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 17:32

There were no other children around, and my DD is 9.
I’ve said it multiple times, but I feel really ashamed and awful, and I regret swearing.

No doubt she will be telling all her friends in school tomorrow how her mummy behaved in the supermarket 🤣🤣

MrsPinkSky · 08/02/2026 17:33

Everyone in supermarkets 'shouts' on Mumsnet.

Customers, cashiers, shelf stackers, customer service staff and trolley collectors 😁

I've yet to see a thread where someone said something annoying/nasty in a normal voice.

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 17:32

There were no other children around, and my DD is 9.
I’ve said it multiple times, but I feel really ashamed and awful, and I regret swearing.

OP posts:
NotnowMildrid · 08/02/2026 17:32

Bravo, well done for teaching your 4 year old DD to swear at people in an argument.

Idleplum · 08/02/2026 17:32

ZoomerBoomer · 08/02/2026 17:17

Fowl tickled me, maybe op was buying a mumsnet chicken to feed 5000 🐓

😂 I realised my error but was too lazy to correct it

MassiveWordSalad · 08/02/2026 17:31

shuggles · 08/02/2026 17:28

Comments like this always pop up on these threads, but I always find them very strange and don't understand what they're trying to say.

I'm not sure how height or hobbies are relevant. Yes, obviously he would have raged at a 6'4'' bodybuilder. Why would that have changed anything?

The point is that some men will decide to bully a woman who is not a physical threat (unlike say, a huge bodybuilder) and socialised to be “nice” because they’re cowardly misogynists.

Gahr · 08/02/2026 17:31

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:29

Well you weren’t polite for very long, were you!

So? This man was not owed politeness.

LaMarschallin · 08/02/2026 17:30

He started shouting at me, saying I had “jumped the queue” and that I shouldn’t go to the till until I had finished my shopping.

He shouldn't have shouted (makes a change from the usual MN "screamed" though) but he wasn't really wrong in what he said.
He wasn't to know that you were swapping something that didn't scan correctly and a lot of people do "bagsie" a till with their goods and then do more shopping.

Just read back before posting:

To explain further: I returned to the till, the man was there with the customer service lady. I immediately apologised. He looked right at me and shouted, “You shouldn’t go to the till until you’ve finished your shopping" and went on to say "You’ve jumped the queue!” He was standing very close and looking directly at my face. I felt upset and taken back because I was polite. Also, there were other tills he could have used or waited for, one till had a cashier with only one customer.
Very different story indeed.
Was the initial reaction not the "everyone cheered and clapped" that you were expecting?

tsmainsqueeze · 08/02/2026 17:29

SunMoonandChocolate · 08/02/2026 16:55

Good for you OP! If only more women had the courage to speak up, instead of letting arrogant arseholes get away with behaving like the big I am!! I say, well done YOU!

Exactly this !
I would have cheered you if i'd have been there.

Gahr · 08/02/2026 17:29

Idleplum · 08/02/2026 17:00

You could have said “don’t speak to me like that”. But you you using fowl language and bemoaning how someone else speaks in front of your child is somewhat hypocritical and makes you look a bit stupid.

He sounds like an arse but so were you.

I don't know. I think that using fowl language is better than chickening out!

OP, you did nothing wrong. Ok, so maybe the swearing wasn't ideal, but who cares! He was incredibly rude and he deserved a telling off.

GlobalTravellerbutespeciallyBognor · 08/02/2026 17:29

Very rude indeed

Growlybear83 · 08/02/2026 17:29

Liiz92 · 08/02/2026 17:25

To explain further: I returned to the till, the man was there with the customer service lady. I immediately apologised. He looked right at me and shouted, “You shouldn’t go to the till until you’ve finished your shopping" and went on to say "You’ve jumped the queue!” He was standing very close and looking directly at my face. I felt upset and taken back because I was polite. Also, there were other tills he could have used or waited for, one till had a cashier with only one customer.

Well you weren’t polite for very long, were you!