To think sending flowers by post/courier to ill people is a bad idea?

I used to work in a florist and we would always try and talk people into sending arrangements if it was for someone unwell or elderly. It's a high maintenance gift, what with changing water and cutting stems.

Letterbox flowers are the fucking worst. I still feel annoyed at being sent letterbox flowers on the birth of my daughter. Just out of hospital after having serious surgical repair, sleep deprived, with a newborn to look after, and some that sends me a box of flowers that come with INSTRUCTIONS for how to cut them to size and arrange them!!!

This is partly tongue in cheek, I of course appreciated the thought, but give me a day off and send some already arranged and in one of those box vases!

100% with you

When I first got long covid my mum kept sending me flowers. Sorting them out would wipe out the whole day and sometimes part of the next. I had to tell her multiple times before she stopped!

I would have bloody loved brownies or cake or a gift card to Cook.

I've even managed to train my husband to realise buying me supermarket flowers isn't much of a gift (even when well). He now knows if he buys me flowers the gift isn't ready until he has arranged them in a vase and thrown away all the packaging. I really appreciate them now!

Well, yeah but the outcome is different!

One friend sent me really lovely bed socks and handcream. They were both appreciated because one side effect was the skin on my hands peeling. Again that was specific to me and other people might not be dealing with that although handcream is generally useful anyway.

When you make a cup of tea you get a cup of tea out of it. Flowers just die. And you have to do another chore, disposing of them, or stare at dead flowers for days.

Sometimes you have to cut the flowers, which is really hard work even for a healthy person.

You can't win can you.
Do something nice - and it isn't good enough.
I understand why people get more and more reluctant dealing with other people.

Flowers can be problematic even for the healthy. I've had flowers that I've been allergic to and some that came with loads of insects. I also once got a massive bouquet upon leaving a job, which was a nice gesture, but meant that as a newly unemployed person I had to pay for a taxi home as there was no way I could carry them on foot.

Yeah I find bunches of flowers a burden even when I'm NOT ill. Why give a gift that requires upkeep?

The person I'm close to with cancer said this, she is a voracious reader so it feels like another massive blow losing her concentration.
Socks? Really lovely ones or a hot water bottle with a good cover, would that be a comfort?
Please don't feel you now have to solve my gifting problems but can I apologise for all us well meaning friends out there who just get it wrong.
Best wishes.

If I am not in close enough proximity to offer someone help, I usually send a voucher for a takeaway or an Amazon voucher by email. That way they can treat themselves to something in their own time.

I love receiving flowers from people that care, no matter how they arrive. And, yes, I am physically disabled.

You can leave the coffee bags on the side & make one when you feel like it.

Flowers need to be dealt with immediately, you have to have something to put them in & if you have a cat, there’s the extra concern of protecting the cat & the flowers from each other - it’s surprising how many flowers are poisonous to cats.

Yanbu, I'm in a similar situation right now. Injury rather than post op but on crutches and in pain.
I had a hamper delivered last week. I nearly dropped it on my bad foot - it's so hard to carry a basket on crutches.

Obviously I would be unreasonable to say anything out loud in rl.
I am so grateful and the biscuits in the hamper were so so good.
I still cried trying to carry the hamper though.

I agree OP. If you are unwell or indisposed after an accident the last thing you want to do is have to find a vase for flowers. Same if you've had a baby.

Baby book baskets are a much better present for a new parent, and if someone is ill or have had an accident, something like some ready meals or taking their bedlinen to wash and putting it back on the bed for them is much more useful than flowers. If you live further away you can send easy to eat/prepare food.

I felt similar after having my first baby. I was struggling with an emergency C-section recovery and a baby who didn’t sleep. Flower deliveries felt overwhelming especially when I ran out of vases to put them into. I also felt like I never got to appreciate them.

I like receiving them if they're already arranged and in water. And even then, I hate having to dispose of them when they're wet and slimy. I'm pretty sure in the olden days (90's) flowers were always arranged and that was part of the reason for them being so much more expensive than supermarket flowers. When they're not arranged I always just think I'd prefer the money and if I want flowers I can buy them from Lidl.

I would only ever send ready vased flowers. I think, ill or not, having to prepare and arrange a bunch is quite a pain in the arse for something that’s supposed to be a gift.

That's why I always order Bloom and Wild's letterbox flowers for people. Not just people who may be ill, but anyone. It's better than them being disturbed to come to the door.

Is it not just as much hassle to make a cup of coffee than put some flowers in a vase?

Yes the note on the door !

Oh god op I’ve been deliberating over this- my mum and Aunty both had illnesses this year that meant they couldn’t get to the door easily but I live hours away, was gutted I couldn’t send flowers as when they’re well they’re both people who adore flowers! It’s so hard, ended up just phoning and felt so useless

Think of it as free rehab exercise 😂

If you Google 'cake cards' there are loads and Moonpig and Funky Pigeon do the chocolate bar cards.