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AIBU?

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My boyfriend

40 replies

Denisa2024 · 07/02/2026 21:39

My boyfriend and I were thinking about getting married. He was hoping he wasn’t still married, even though he never signed any papers after many years apart. His ex-wife has moved on with a new boyfriend and they have a little girl together.

My boyfriend and this woman aren’t divorced yet, and I later found out she’s low on money and waiting for him to finalise the divorce. I’m also wondering — is my boyfriend the legal father of her daughter, even if he’s not the biological dad?

Thanks!

OP posts:
ForPearlViper · 07/02/2026 22:22

Is this a new boyfriend since the one you had just married in around August OP, whose ex pestered for money? You certainly get around.

PollyBell · 07/02/2026 21:59

YourWinter · 07/02/2026 21:46

Nobody is too thick to know whether they’re divorced. Are you in the UK? Were they married in the UK?

Normally I would agree with you but are you new on here

Op if he doesn't know this he was not mature enough to know if he is married in the first place

Lonelycrab · 07/02/2026 21:57

slashlover · 07/02/2026 21:54

Why did you edit this so many times?

Im not sure

slashlover · 07/02/2026 21:54

Lonelycrab · 07/02/2026 21:45

Not sure

Edited

Why did you edit this so many times?

LoveWine123 · 07/02/2026 21:52

He was hoping he wasn’t still
married 🤣

JohnofWessex · 07/02/2026 21:50

Its a train wreck

He needs to get divorced fast.

In the Republic of Ireland where Divorce was prohibited by the constitution for a period and it seems that the powers that be were pretty bloody-minded about it men could end up liable for their estranged children by other men however I dont see it happening here

There is however a legal presumption of legitimacy for any children born to a married woman

Jumimo · 07/02/2026 21:46

What? 😂

YourWinter · 07/02/2026 21:46

Nobody is too thick to know whether they’re divorced. Are you in the UK? Were they married in the UK?

Duvetdayneeded · 07/02/2026 21:45

You really want to marry someone like him???!

Lonelycrab · 07/02/2026 21:45

Not sure

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 07/02/2026 21:44

AnneLovesGilbert · 07/02/2026 21:40

He was hoping he wasn’t still married, even though he never signed any papers

Is this real?

He sounds a bit thick to be honest!

TellMeSomethingGoodAboutMrSchuAndHisTightBreeks · 07/02/2026 21:43

Presumably the father is on the birth certificate so your boyfriend isn't the legal father, the father is the legal father.

Divorce would be a lot easier if you could just wish your ex away, but he is pretty stupid if he thinks he's divorced and didn't sign a thing.

I wouldn't be hitching my wagon to this man, he sounds completely passive about his own life, and you would be sorting out everything for eternity.

Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain · 07/02/2026 21:43

So he hasn’t got his decree nisi or absolute through yet?

ShawnaMacallister · 07/02/2026 21:42

If she put him on the birth certificate then he is, and she could have done that without him there as they are married. Would she have done that? It would be a really weird thing to do. How does a man 'hope' he's divorced even though he didn't sign divorce papers?

AnneLovesGilbert · 07/02/2026 21:40

He was hoping he wasn’t still married, even though he never signed any papers

Is this real?

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