Should men be using soap to wash their beef flute?

The13thFairy · 09/02/2026 10:37

Warmlover · 07/02/2026 18:04

Men’s penises do not exist to be sucked. And women don’t exist to ‘play’ them.

Preach!

JohnTheRevelator · 09/02/2026 01:51

Their what?!

MandingoAteMyBaby · 09/02/2026 01:07

Finessing the custard-chucker with a wax and polish

Warmlover · 09/02/2026 00:52

BauhausOfEliott · 08/02/2026 18:57

Oh, do get over yourself.

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Get over myself why? Explain properly

Original poster

TeenyWeenyPolkaDotPeeny · 08/02/2026 19:31

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 08/02/2026 19:08

I'd really like to know what country , or part of the UK, this odd phrase comes from ?

I’m from the south west 🤣

OP posts:

Rayburn · 08/02/2026 19:16

OriginalSkang · 08/02/2026 18:56

Someone on here once told me they'd never looked at or touched their own bum and were aghast at the suggestion that's something someone might do

They probably don’t even own a bumscope!

oncemoreuntothebeachdearfriends · 08/02/2026 19:08

I'd really like to know what country , or part of the UK, this odd phrase comes from ?

Flannelfeet · 08/02/2026 19:02

BauhausOfEliott · 08/02/2026 18:52

Firstly, he isn’t and never was my husband. As I said, it was an ex-boyfriend.

Secondly, what is there to ‘feel sick’ about? You must know that men pull their foreskin to wash, right? That isn’t ‘a special way of washing’. It’s literally just normal hygiene.

Mumsnet is so fucking weird about men’s bodies.

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Its the visual image you gave me hen.

No need to get your knickers in a twist when it was just a bloody laugh.

Hankunamatata · 08/02/2026 19:02

Yes and they should clean under foreskin if they have one

BauhausOfEliott · 08/02/2026 19:01

OriginalSkang · 08/02/2026 18:56

Someone on here once told me they'd never looked at or touched their own bum and were aghast at the suggestion that's something someone might do

😂😂😂

BauhausOfEliott · 08/02/2026 18:57

Warmlover · 07/02/2026 18:04

Men’s penises do not exist to be sucked. And women don’t exist to ‘play’ them.

Oh, do get over yourself.

OriginalSkang · 08/02/2026 18:56

Someone on here once told me they'd never looked at or touched their own bum and were aghast at the suggestion that's something someone might do

BauhausOfEliott · 08/02/2026 18:52

Flannelfeet · 07/02/2026 18:47

Jesus christ I actually feel sick at thinking about your husband's special way of washing his wanger 😳🤢🤢

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Firstly, he isn’t and never was my husband. As I said, it was an ex-boyfriend.

Secondly, what is there to ‘feel sick’ about? You must know that men pull their foreskin to wash, right? That isn’t ‘a special way of washing’. It’s literally just normal hygiene.

Mumsnet is so fucking weird about men’s bodies.

InveterateWineDrinker · 08/02/2026 14:25

SerendipityJane · 08/02/2026 10:50

I bet you're fun at parties.

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Some of the most pious, sanctimonius people I know never go to parties because they're out dogging.

Rayburn · 08/02/2026 14:13

Warmlover · 08/02/2026 13:37

Because I don’t guffaw at someone saying, ‘beef flute’ and demand it goes in the box of ‘classic’ for being so utterly crazy and hilarious?

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If I guffaw, I’ll be first on the thread.

”Guffaw!”

There you go.

MandingoAteMyBaby · 08/02/2026 13:51

Real men use swarfega and scouring pads.

SerendipityJane · 08/02/2026 13:46

Warmlover · 08/02/2026 13:37

Because I don’t guffaw at someone saying, ‘beef flute’ and demand it goes in the box of ‘classic’ for being so utterly crazy and hilarious?

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Yes, that would be it.

Warmlover · 08/02/2026 13:37

SerendipityJane · 08/02/2026 10:50

I bet you're fun at parties.

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Because I don’t guffaw at someone saying, ‘beef flute’ and demand it goes in the box of ‘classic’ for being so utterly crazy and hilarious?

SerendipityJane · 08/02/2026 10:50

Warmlover · 07/02/2026 23:49

Why do people on MN get so over excited about some shit chav slang for genitals?

no-one needs to ‘enter it’ for anything. And how is a shit phrase for a dick ‘a classic?’ I mean we could all just list stupid words we’ve heard. Maybe it would entertain some people here I’m sure….

I bet you're fun at parties.

Rayburn · 08/02/2026 10:38

Warmlover · 07/02/2026 23:49

Why do people on MN get so over excited about some shit chav slang for genitals?

no-one needs to ‘enter it’ for anything. And how is a shit phrase for a dick ‘a classic?’ I mean we could all just list stupid words we’ve heard. Maybe it would entertain some people here I’m sure….

I, for one, welcome your list of stupid words.

Lemondrizzle4A · 08/02/2026 08:11

Today an article on BBC about males injecting penises to enhance performance on the ski slopes. 🤣🤣

IcantFeelMyFaceNow · 08/02/2026 07:58

PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 07/02/2026 18:27

For God's sake, why would I read this after three strong Belgian beers? To be fair to op, she laid it all out in her title - why don't I learn?

As an aside, I played the flute to a high standard as a young woman.

When we were young, we all did love. : )

Soashamed60 · 08/02/2026 03:53

Soashamed60 · 08/02/2026 03:52

Tofu tube 🤣🤣

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I think i quoted the wrong post!

Soashamed60 · 08/02/2026 03:52

TeenyWeenyPolkaDotPeeny · 07/02/2026 17:58

I used this in the midst of depressive episodes.

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Tofu tube 🤣🤣

Original poster

TeenyWeenyPolkaDotPeeny · 08/02/2026 01:25

Warmlover · 07/02/2026 23:49

Why do people on MN get so over excited about some shit chav slang for genitals?

no-one needs to ‘enter it’ for anything. And how is a shit phrase for a dick ‘a classic?’ I mean we could all just list stupid words we’ve heard. Maybe it would entertain some people here I’m sure….

Back again I see, just can’t get enough of my shit chav slang for penis? Bless 🍪

OP posts: