Tiny bit of me wants to point out Karma (disability related)

Yes, the only thing between any person and acquiring a disability is luck and time.

However, while I see why it would be very enjoyable to point it out as karma to him, I would be wary of doing so - the concept that people cause their disabilities through their intent and actions is already used to by people as he is to deny disabled people support and needed care. And he'll likely just keep acting that way towards other disabled people he sees as less deserving.

I'll give a mild example - a nurse told my husband to our faces that because of how he looks (broad shoulders, long hair, how he dresses), she thought his injuries were from a motorcycle accident and was going to send him away - but when she learned the reality was he'd survived a vicious attack that damaged his spine years back which led to difficulties in other joints, she was willing to put him forward for further physiotherapy and other care. I've heard a lot worse than this, but it's one of the more brazen ones I've heard - usually it's not to the patient, but in wider discussions we have medical professionals using this type of rhetoric. IME, it's a not uncommon mindset.

Disabled people all being in a home would cost more than benefits, so this guy is stupid as well as ableist.

He did! He’s learning a very hard lesson and I’d let him learn it.

I just wouldn't get involved with this. It would cost me too much, having to keep quiet about his very nasty views. I'd just use the "it's not professional to advise mates" excuse.

You could: If he is eligible for help from your employer, let him apply through the proper process, but tell your employer you know him personally and someone else should help him, to keep things professional. If he isn't eligible for advice from your organisation, suggest others he could use.

This post is such bad taste. It almost feels like you think he has got what he deserves.

I think I would have to have a conversation where we discussed his previous extreme beliefs about disabled people and what he said about your job working for a charity 'contributing to the problem'. I'd want to know his views on the situation now and how they have changed. If he now came down the line of 'I can't believe I used to think like that, I was so wrong and I'm so sorry', then I would be prepared to draw a line under it. Otherwise, I don't think I could. Your friend can help her husband instead,

I would leave him to it. Other people can assist him. It wouldn't be me.

Why?
All we're hearing lately is how benefits should be cut. This is just the other side of that.
No one knows what may happen and what they might need in future.
.

Xccccc
This post feels in bad taste.

yes op, my parents had a saying if there are things you can think but never say, I personally can’t believe you’ve gone through your own crap, help people with disabilities and ever even thought this let alone are saying you’re helping because of your friend.

Is he expecting you to help him jump queues and full in forms for him? Because his wife is your friend ?

You could say "Oh , Barry I'd love to help you but you need to go through the Charity referall just to make sure the right person helps you with the right advice "

So not a "Yeah , Hell will freeze over before I lift a finger to help you matey" more of a "Yeah I'm not going to put myself out to help you "

It's amazingly common for people to think certain things won't happen to them. Because they're special, and immune. What it is about their specialness that qualifies them to pontificate about others, I haven't quite fathomed.
It's understandable that you have a certain feeling of, not quite Schadenfreude, but of nodding to yourself and thinking, well, now you're learning something, pal. It's not the most saintly response, but you're not required to be a saint.

I don't think I would remind him as such.
However, when he is more able I would be pushing him to help others in similar circumstances.

This - me too.

It doesn't mean divine forgiveness for past behaviour and actions though. He's still the same person he was before.

Honestly, I'd want a frank apology from him before I lifted a finger to help him directly. Make him acknowledge what a prick he was and admit it.

You are probably not the only person who can assist him. He could ask someone else but he came to you despite his behaviour towards you personally? Then he needs to own his previous behaviour and take accountability for it.

I wouldn’t be helping him. He should ask someone who he hasn’t spewed his vile opinions to. Sorry I’m not a Pollyanna.

It means action or deed plus consequences. So the deed in this case is saying that disabled people are a drain.

Well I assumed she was being facetious and was referring to the men in frocks aggressively trying to erode women's rights and who of course are absolutely not the "most vulnerable" in society. That is children and the disabled.

Agreed

I don't think you need to remind him of his old views. He knows what they were, and he knows the irony. He also knows that you know...

The word karma literally means action or deed.

It doesn't mean divine retribution or what goes around comes around.So i'm not sure what you mean.

What does action or deed have to do with this?Because that's all karma means.

I like to remind people who are down on disabled 'scroungers' that they will be disabled one day too, if they are lucky enough to live long enough. In old age we accrue disabilities like reduced mobility, hearing, sight. We tend to write those off as just being part of being older, but they are disabilities, and most of us will experience them.

In this case OP its not worth raising it. He was an idiot but he's going through a huge life change and all of us deserve some patience and sympathy during moments like that.

I don’t see the Op being gleeful here at all. Nor is it in bad taste.

Op you are right to help him and to be compassionate to his situation, as you probably are to your clients.

But you are a better person than me. Because although I would also help him, I’d be making him work for it a bit more. Questioning why it’s needed, when he’s never believed in it. Isn’t he just going to go straight back to work? Make him eat his former words!

But that’s on me and I accept my character flaws!

I dont think its necessarily in bad taste. It's a result of years of frustration and constant insults.

It's constantly spewed on here that we disabled are a drain on society and liars.

Unfortunately that sometimes bleeds into real life and its really hard to deal with.

I had similar at a dinner party with "best friends" about 10 years ago. They were so smug that they were paying for me to exist and I shouldn't be spending their money on anything they deemed unsuitable. (I think i had on a new top and conversion became how did I justify spending benefits on clothes...my Husband works so???) I left and have never spoken to them again.

Thats just one example, but the one that cut deepest.

Ive seen it over and over that noone should claim anything, until its their turn and then "well I've earned it"

I think that when it is less raw you can certainly reassure him that his disability does not make him a drain and that this is why the benefits system exists

you don’t need to explicitly remind him what he used to say… though I’d be tempted