that weekends and free time are solely about the dc?

We also take it in turns to have "me time". Essential in our house!

We have one child and our weekends look like a mixture of what you describe. Our 4 year old has swimming and football on Saturday mornings. We tend to fill the rest of the weekend with a mix of kid friendly activities, birthday parties, chilling at home, going out to eat and shopping/errands.

Apologies that you found the information that other people also can't afford babysitters (and so have to give each other time away from the kids) 'curt bordering on rude'. You have my humble apologies. It is true though.

The post of mine you answered was about taking time for yourself away from DH and DC. I didn't post anything about you and DH being together, it was exactly the opposite!

We spend time as a family but also maintain some elements of our pre-kid life - I still meet and go out with my friends, and DH does childcare. DH does the same with his friends, and I reciprocate. We go out for meals together or to the theatre occasionally, and grandparents step in. I think it’s important to have other things going on. That said, we have one, and have a good support network of grandparents, and each other.

I think we went for a mix when the kids were little. In our case the weekends were less about 'kids' than family as both sets of parents live nearby so we saw them a lot.

I did shopping, meals out and family days out that were child orientated when mine were little. Activities started at about 5 for both. I think both you and your friends have pretty typical family lives.
Why are you comparing? Are you unhappy with your life or do you feel they're doing it 'wrong'.

You don't need to fill every moment of your children's lives let them entertain themselves, let them be bored, let them play with all the toys they have, let them relax and watch some TV. Your life is how you choose it to be

We have 2 dc, though ours are a bit older now (8 & 13) and I’d say our lives are more like your friends.

Our dc don’t have any regular weekend activities. That’s an intentional choice. Sometimes my older one has an extra sports training or a competition, but maybe 10 times a year max.

Our weekends are a mix of chilling at home or doing jobs around the house, the dc seeing friends, a day or an afternoon out (walk, beach, NT, bike ride, we live in a very outdoorsy area), and Dh and I doing things we enjoy (I will ride my horse, Dh goes for a bike ride or a run or might take older one on a long day hike). Sometimes I might take one of them to the cinema or Dh might go meet a friend for a drink. They definitely aren’t totally taken up entirely by family activities though.

I should add, I’ll watch the DC while DP will go to the gym and he’ll watch the DC if I want to get a facial, nails, etc done or run errands. So we both normally get a bit of ‘me’ time too.

So your DH looks after them while you have some time to be a person outside of the family and you do the same for him. That's how most other people do it.

My children are the same age as yours. We have meals out (with the children), chill at home, go to parks, museums or shopping. It depends on the weather, what we all feel like doing and who is or isn’t unwell 😅 We hire a babysitter from time to time to go out to dinner on our own, normally during the week. My 5 year old is very chill, my 2 year old much less so.

We spend more time than I’d like visiting and being visited by GPs but it is what it is and the DCs love seeing them.

Mine are 6 and 4, my weekend looks a lot like yours. Two classes (both at 9am) and lots of time out and about as a family. It's what I like to do and similarish to my life pre kids, I'd hate taking the kids shopping.

I lose my mind on winter Sundays after 4pm when it's dark and cold and there's nowhere to go.

I deliberately didn’t book DD into any clubs or activities at the weekend so we could just do what we fancied. Mon-Fri was full on with work, after school clubs and activities, so weekends were kept free.

I have 3 DCs - 12, 5 and nearly 2. Saturday mornings are DD2’s gymnastics and DD1’s performing arts club. The rest of the weekend depends. Sometimes we don’t do anything and just chill at home. Sometimes we’re out with family or friends or just us. One weekend evening is usually reserved for our family film night.

On very rare occasions, DH and/or I will have plans without our kids. We’re both full time (me condescended to 4 days with DS on my day off) so it’s nice to have some downtime too.

YANBU if that's what makes you happy.

Personally, I'd make the effort to carve out a little bit of time for yourself away from your DC and DH, just for you. One day your kids won't want or need you in the same way and it's good to have some other interest/friends/hobby outside of them. It also stops you being a Mum bore! I don't think this means hanging around a retail park with your kids though.

DH and I have one 3 year old and definitely aren't having lots of meals out and relaxing times at the weekend 😅

2&5 is quite young for both DC to have scheduled activities both weekend mornings. It would be more normal imho for you to only have the 5 yo in sports/swimming, and for you to take turns with the other to be chilling at home with toddler.

We wouldn't have done things like soft play and trips to national trust every weekend afternoon when they had activities in the morning already. We would have had some time playing at home/in the garden/doing jobs.

I do think its quite normal for the weekend to revolve around family though

It wont be anymore interesting for them then and harder for them to realise not everything revolves around them as thats what they know. 8 year old and twins....they learn how to play, how to seperate if arguing and how to not trash the place as they tidy up. Even under 2s join in fill up the box.

My teens have very time consuming hobbies i spend a lot of time in car parks waiting for them and once they are done no-one wants to go shopping, but they would like more meals out, but they eat as much as a horse so cant afford it too often.
I am very glad that when they were younger we did activities as a family which made us close, but also able to broaden their horizons rather tham them doing individual clubs. Now, even though the weekends are very boring for me and i find i cant book trips away very easily (which we always used to enjoy), we are still very close and have a good relationship.

We don’t have any child clubs at the weekend. If they want to do anything it’s of a week day evening. Weekends are split between things the adults want to do (sometimes with a baby sitter) and things the kids want to do. Parents are as entitled to chill or do things they enjoy as well as the kids!

I would imagine it depends on your working situation.
Not to take away anything from the days you have with your younger child, but I would imagine if you’re both working full time and only have the weekends to do a food shop, clean house, get uniforms ready etc then days out take a bit of a back seat unless they’re pre-planned.

I used to sit on the floor and play with my daughter and her toys after school most days and for several hours each Saturday and Sunday. We have a lovely museum and park within easy walking distance and always went there at least twice a week. I took my daughter swimming once a week from around 5 onwards and we went to soft play with friends every 2-3 weeks. But her preference was usually to play with her toys - mostly Sylvanian families and her huge collection of Tony tinkle tot babies.