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Husband didn’t celebrate my ‘win’

237 replies

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 22:48

Working on a high level project for many months was waiting to find out if it had been funded and approved - it was a long shot but hard work put in by the team I led and it got approved on Friday and today we found out we had additional funding allocated based on the strength of out proposal. I worked so hard on this and this win was beyond my wildest dreams professionally- I had numerous msg from family and friends wishing me well and asking how I’d got on nothing from husband and when I came home and told him and said excitedly to the kids hopefully this will mean more money for mummy which I can spend on you he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes (nb I’m on 60k a year xxs’s is on 200 k plus so I know I’m small fry but for me I’m over what I thought I’d be earning) I felt diminished I know I’m not that high level but for me I’m doing better than I ever expected thus is a big win and was so non interested (fine it’s my work probably boring to every one else) but for the time effort I would have celebrated him

OP posts:
tachetastic · 02/02/2026 23:34

Shinyandnew1 · 02/02/2026 23:20

he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes

'But it's more than you, dear'

If he's going to be shitty, be shitty back.

See I was going to go with:

"and he has a bigger dick than you...."

but your version is more family friendly! 😂

Bestfootforward11 · 02/02/2026 23:33

Huge congrats! Well done, that sounds like a huge amount of work and it really paid off!
I am afraid your DH is a small and mean spirited man. He couldnt let you just have your moment and had to stomp on it. He should be your biggest champion and be thrilled his wife is so brilliant. I don’t know how the rest of things are in your relationship such that it would be worth telling him how he made your feel? I suspect there’s other stuff. You are not being over sensitive, he’s being a fool.

Noshadelamp · 02/02/2026 23:33

Shinyandnew1 · 02/02/2026 23:20

he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes

'But it's more than you, dear'

If he's going to be shitty, be shitty back.

I completely misunderstood the op, I thought it must have been her DH that earned more. Because why would he set himself up for the op to say this?

Where on earth does he get the AUDACITY to put op down with a comment like that when he earns LESS than xxx's dad AND @Thatpunkjumper

MsAmerica · 02/02/2026 23:30

Well, did you say something to him?

Wreckinball · 02/02/2026 23:30

Jealousy is so ugly. I hope he gets the hint and apologises to you wholeheartedly for his behaviour and congratulates you. Well done to you

WheresthesaladTheresthesalad · 02/02/2026 23:28

Congratulations on your achievement, absolutely brilliant! Your hard work has paid off, be proud.

As for your husband, his behaviour is utterly appalling. Cutting you down when he should be your biggest champion.

I had a father who did this constantly. It is appalling and impactful. Eventually went NC with him in my late 40s as couldn't take it any more. These people are pathetic but they are relentless in their patheticness.

You deserve better OP 💐

Noshadelamp · 02/02/2026 23:27

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 22:58

it been massively impactful if I’m honest I’ve not been able to speak to him directly since as I’m just so disappointed in him together 10 years I’ve always been his biggest champion

Exactly, you've been his biggest champion because clearly he's the most important person in your family, so he thinks.
It's a total lack of respect, he takes you for granted and doesn't see you as a person in your own right.

MidnightMeltdown · 02/02/2026 23:27

Ooof what a prick. That’s a very deliberate put down. As others have said, he’s clearly jealous that you earn more than him.

Moveoverdarlin · 02/02/2026 23:26

I would have it out with him. Tell him ‘I couldn’t really give a flying fuck what Josh’s Dad earns, it’s a bloke we know from school and he isn’t going to be forking out for my MOT or annual holiday - I am. So just to let you know I am over the fucking moon with this news today. I’ve had texts from all my family and friends, and when I told the person who I love most in the world, they literally pissed all over my chips in front of our children and made me feel like a stupid child for getting so excited. Why compare me to a man earning 200 grand? You’ve fucking ruined this day for me and it will now always be tainted. Did you mean to be such a spiteful cunt?

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:22

Shinyandnew1 · 02/02/2026 23:20

he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes

'But it's more than you, dear'

If he's going to be shitty, be shitty back.

I will do next time love if 💕🙌💕

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Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:22

Thank you making me feel semi sane as I was worried I’d be so hyper focused on work for become ultra sensitive- in don’t think I am but for that to be my
‘welcome home’ was a kicked in the teeth. He’s currently silent and I’ve had to sort out the kids uniforms pack lunches etc as he’s retreated and disengaged

OP posts:
Shinyandnew1 · 02/02/2026 23:20

he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes

'But it's more than you, dear'

If he's going to be shitty, be shitty back.

crazeekat · 02/02/2026 23:20

Jealousy. He is seething that u have made an huge accomplishment and you not relying on him. He sounds a bit pathetic actually. Be proud of yourself, u don’t need anyone else to do it for you.

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 02/02/2026 23:15

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:10

Not much less than me he’s 44-50k and we NEED every penny so why he’s not happy at the likely additional money is beyond my comprehension

yep he’s jealous of you out-earning him. And jealous of xx’s dad too.
(I’ve no idea how much my friends earn let alone my kids friends parents!)

ReadingSoManyThreads · 02/02/2026 23:14

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:07

Not him a dad from school on 200k a year who we hardly know - our son is friends with xxx’s dad so he’s our ‘rich’ point of reference my husband is on 50k ish he’s always encouraging me to earn more ‘you should be earning more’ so it makes no sense when I’m doing well he’s not happy ?!

Because telling you "you should be earning more" was just a stick to beat you with. Now that you actually will be, his ego can't take it, so he's just beat you again with the xxx's Dad's £200K jibe.

He's cruel.

What else does he do/say to make you feel like this is the last straw?

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 02/02/2026 23:14

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:07

Not him a dad from school on 200k a year who we hardly know - our son is friends with xxx’s dad so he’s our ‘rich’ point of reference my husband is on 50k ish he’s always encouraging me to earn more ‘you should be earning more’ so it makes no sense when I’m doing well he’s not happy ?!

Ewww grim. That’s such a weird thing for him to say as well as it being an obvious dig at you x

MsMarple · 02/02/2026 23:13

He’s threatened that you out earn him now and you are on the way up, so he makes himself feel better by trying to put you down. Utterly horrible!

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:10

Crispynoodle · 02/02/2026 23:07

Yup he feels threatened by your success I had one of those once! Until I divorced him. What does he do for work? What’s his annual salary?

Not much less than me he’s 44-50k and we NEED every penny so why he’s not happy at the likely additional money is beyond my comprehension

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Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:08

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 02/02/2026 23:03

Ps congratulations on your win! You should be proud of yourself. You don’t need his praise. Fuck him.

Thank you I am and massively proud of the team against all odds we did it 🙌

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Crispynoodle · 02/02/2026 23:07

Yup he feels threatened by your success I had one of those once! Until I divorced him. What does he do for work? What’s his annual salary?

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:07

Not him a dad from school on 200k a year who we hardly know - our son is friends with xxx’s dad so he’s our ‘rich’ point of reference my husband is on 50k ish he’s always encouraging me to earn more ‘you should be earning more’ so it makes no sense when I’m doing well he’s not happy ?!

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Ialwaysthoughtitwasadojo · 02/02/2026 23:07

That’s not as much as I make?! What a prick, and an immature one at that. Surprised he makes £200k.

Take it from me, once they stop celebrating your success it’s all down hill from there.

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 02/02/2026 23:03

Ps congratulations on your win! You should be proud of yourself. You don’t need his praise. Fuck him.

AccidentalPrawnYouFool · 02/02/2026 23:03

Who is xx’s dad is he referring to himself in the third person, so he’s on 200K a year? Or is this someone else you know that’s on 200K a year?
either way he’s a cunt obviously.
but talking about what someone else earns, to the kids no less, gives me the massive ick!

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:01

Cut me down to size - that’s what. Hurts the most it was an absolute fuck you in front of our kids. This might well be my final straw it really might I’m in tears he’s ruined the whole weekend and today’s news

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