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Original poster

Husband didn’t celebrate my ‘win’

237 replies

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 22:48

Working on a high level project for many months was waiting to find out if it had been funded and approved - it was a long shot but hard work put in by the team I led and it got approved on Friday and today we found out we had additional funding allocated based on the strength of out proposal. I worked so hard on this and this win was beyond my wildest dreams professionally- I had numerous msg from family and friends wishing me well and asking how I’d got on nothing from husband and when I came home and told him and said excitedly to the kids hopefully this will mean more money for mummy which I can spend on you he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes (nb I’m on 60k a year xxs’s is on 200 k plus so I know I’m small fry but for me I’m over what I thought I’d be earning) I felt diminished I know I’m not that high level but for me I’m doing better than I ever expected thus is a big win and was so non interested (fine it’s my work probably boring to every one else) but for the time effort I would have celebrated him

OP posts:
Jeschara · 03/02/2026 00:54

Congratulations, his spiteful remark would make me lose all respect for him. How old is he 7, it is such a infantile remark, normally accompanied by children going ner, ner, ner, ner.
Don't be a wimp, he really needs to be told how pathetic he sounds, tell him he sounds jealous, and that he must feel threatened.
He is a bad example to the children, and the admiration for xxxx Father is pathetic, otherwise why would he bring him into a conversation that had nothing to do with this man.
I would honestly think about leaving

RobertaFirmino · 03/02/2026 00:52

Oh, so it's not as much as xxx dad makes is it? Well why doesn't he just fuck off and marry HIM then if your money's not good enough!

As a fellow woman and MNer, I am very proud of you! It's not just about money is it? It's about the hard slog and the recognition. The feeling of seeing plans come to fruition. Being seen, heard and validated. Someone saying 'Yes, this team is capable'. Well done!

JHound · 03/02/2026 00:37

Do you outearn him? It seems like your success intimidates him so he wants to humble you.

nothanks2026 · 03/02/2026 00:31

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:01

Cut me down to size - that’s what. Hurts the most it was an absolute fuck you in front of our kids. This might well be my final straw it really might I’m in tears he’s ruined the whole weekend and today’s news

Unfortunately, that was the intention.

nothanks2026 · 03/02/2026 00:29

Is he usually a completely self centred cunt who can't stand anyone to do well without trying to make them feel like shit - or is this a one off?

Petitcha · 03/02/2026 00:21

This is what a small, ugly, petty man looks like.
When someone shows you who they are, believe them.

Put him on an information diet OP, he is now not someone to share your wins.

Congratulations on this huge success.
You cannot change him but you can certainly detach and protect yourself.

His silence is to punish you for not accepting him making a show of himself in front of his children.

His model of manhood is pathetic.
You won't forget his go to behaviour in the face of your win, nor should you.
Some behaviour can not be unseen.

Make sure you tell family and friends what an insecure twat he is.

Well done.

DidIJustHearWhatIThinkYouSaid · 03/02/2026 00:17

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:01

Cut me down to size - that’s what. Hurts the most it was an absolute fuck you in front of our kids. This might well be my final straw it really might I’m in tears he’s ruined the whole weekend and today’s news

OP, Don’t allow yourself to feel like this- stay strong like you did when getting your project through. Celebrate your success and take your kids out for a nice meal. And book yourself a spa too. Your husband sounds jealous.

Original poster
Thatpunkjumper · 03/02/2026 00:17

Thank you all for reassuring me I hadn’t overreacted I’ll need to deal with that now but it’s for the I m ow this is not ok x

OP posts:
WinnerWinnerChickenDinnner · 03/02/2026 00:12

Congratulations!!! That's a huge deal! I'm sorry that your dh is such a wet blanket.

MaidOfSteel · 03/02/2026 00:09

Congratulations to you & your team on your fantastic achievement, OP! MN is celebrating you tonight.

Please don’t let your husband bring you down. He’s clearly threatened because you’ve surpassed him and this is mean-spirited and his way of bringing you down.

I wish you all the best with your work and with your decision on what to do next.

Wayk · 03/02/2026 00:06

Huge congratulations. Please do not let him take away how good you felt to have achieved this. Go girl.

Original poster
Thatpunkjumper · 03/02/2026 00:05

All food for thought thank you

OP posts:
tiredlazydoesntmatter · 03/02/2026 00:05

OP congratulations on your achievement and I hope you can continue feeling massively proud of yourself.
Show your husband this thread and hopefully he will feel guilty and embarrassed by his response to your promotion.💐Xx

unsync · 03/02/2026 00:00

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:10

Not much less than me he’s 44-50k and we NEED every penny so why he’s not happy at the likely additional money is beyond my comprehension

Show quote history

He's not happy because you earning more is making him feel insecure and emasculated. He's a misogynistic dick who thinks he's better than you. You've just shown him that's not the case and he doesn't like it.

Well done, don't let him piss on your parade.

Original poster
Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:57

It’s such a shame I cannot begin to tell you the work that went into this it’s been a huge piece of work for all our us

OP posts:
sunshinestar1986 · 02/02/2026 23:57

Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 22:48

Working on a high level project for many months was waiting to find out if it had been funded and approved - it was a long shot but hard work put in by the team I led and it got approved on Friday and today we found out we had additional funding allocated based on the strength of out proposal. I worked so hard on this and this win was beyond my wildest dreams professionally- I had numerous msg from family and friends wishing me well and asking how I’d got on nothing from husband and when I came home and told him and said excitedly to the kids hopefully this will mean more money for mummy which I can spend on you he said it won’t be as much as xxx’s dad makes (nb I’m on 60k a year xxs’s is on 200 k plus so I know I’m small fry but for me I’m over what I thought I’d be earning) I felt diminished I know I’m not that high level but for me I’m doing better than I ever expected thus is a big win and was so non interested (fine it’s my work probably boring to every one else) but for the time effort I would have celebrated him

Gosh, how sad.
How would he feel if you said, still more than you eh?

Original poster
Thatpunkjumper · 02/02/2026 23:55

Yes that why it’s so hurtful there’s no way back from this. I’m a wimp I’ve not said anything because there too much to say so I’ve been silent and he’s been silent (very unusual so he knows he’s done something( just such a shame for the kids they were so excited when I got home and were asking why mummy was sad before bed)

OP posts:
Driftingawaynow · 02/02/2026 23:49

OSTMusTisNT · 02/02/2026 22:59

Your DH has small penis syndrome.

Please don’t. Comments like this are really foul and cruel

TheFireHorse · 02/02/2026 23:46

I think your eyes have now been opened. I suspect this isn't the only time he's put you down.

Maybe you're just seeing it now?

No one who loves you behaves like this. Sorry OP and huge congratulations!!

ilovesooty · 02/02/2026 23:42

Wreckinball · 02/02/2026 23:30

Jealousy is so ugly. I hope he gets the hint and apologises to you wholeheartedly for his behaviour and congratulates you. Well done to you

Even if he does he won't be able to unsay what he said or undo the hurt he's caused. @Thatpunkjumper I would be devastated.

arethereanyleftatall · 02/02/2026 23:42

Sorry but I think this is bigger than this.

if people I love and like achieve something wonderful, I am happy for them.

And the reverse. He isn’t happy that you’re happy op.

given what you’ve said, I think this is the final nail that’s made you realise.

sorry op.

Witchyvibes · 02/02/2026 23:41

Oh, that sucks! How mean of him! I'd take the chance to set an example for your kids- organise a celebration because you're so proud (rightly) of what you've achieved, and teach them to celebrate their own successes no matter who tries to diminish them (and shame the bejeezus out of you husband while you're at it).

dimples76 · 02/02/2026 23:40

Well done, you! I am so sorry that your celebrations were spoiled

VoltaireMittyDream · 02/02/2026 23:35

Northerngirl821 · 02/02/2026 22:49

Have you explained to him how you feel?

I never understand this kind of comment.

Surely nobody with an average IQ and even remotely passable social skills should need it explained to him why this was an outrageously cunty thing to say.

BooneyBeautiful · 02/02/2026 23:34

TappyGilmore · 02/02/2026 22:53

YANBU. I was getting ready to say that a lack
of celebration probably just means that he doesn’t realise what a big deal it is, but the comment about not as much as xxxx’s dad makes is just low and pathetic.

This is the sort of thing my ex-H would say. He didn't like me being happy and/or successful, hence the ex.