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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have a baby with a man i dont love

162 replies

ComeAtMe · 01/02/2026 19:32

I have 1 kid with my husband. I don't love my husband anymore. It used to be pretty awful, he was horrible to me, but now we have settled into housemate life. He is a good dad but he is sexist and uncaring. I do it all and I used to that now.

I know i want to leave and I will. But is it horrible of me to have a baby before I do?

I know everyone will say how selfish to the baby to bring a child into an unloving marriage, but the baby will be v loved, looked after and surely all kids would rather be alive than not?

Pls explain why its a terrible idea. I am perfectly capable of looking after a new child and loving them, with or without my husband.

OP posts:
yay4vee · 01/02/2026 19:48

It’s one thing to have a baby with someone you don’t like, but it’s a whole other kettle of fish to have a baby knowingly with a bad man. Don’t breed with shit people, move on.

Rickrolypoly · 01/02/2026 19:48

I really hope this is just a troll

Sarah2891 · 01/02/2026 19:48

Yes great idea to give another child a sexist and uncaring man as a dad.
Sorry but this is not a good idea.

TheJoyousHiker · 01/02/2026 19:47

….. I know everyone will say how selfish to the baby to bring a child into an unloving marriage, but the baby will be v loved, looked after and surely all kids would rather be alive than not. ….

I think that’s a very silly comment. If a baby isn’t conceived, there is no baby so they can never think they’d rather be alive than not.

Evaka · 01/02/2026 19:47

Can you afford to give a second child a good life on your own? Have you worked out all the financials and living arrangements?

LivelyLizard · 01/02/2026 19:46

TittyGajillions · 01/02/2026 19:45

surely all kids would rather be alive than not

Well that's an utterly ridiculous justification for bringing a child into the world 🙄

Agreed 🤷‍♀️

Bonkers1966 · 01/02/2026 19:45

I was in a similar situation in my twenties. I decided to stick to the one child I had and got rid of the partner as soon as. To this day I regret not having a second child.

TittyGajillions · 01/02/2026 19:45

surely all kids would rather be alive than not

Well that's an utterly ridiculous justification for bringing a child into the world 🙄

BrendaSmall · 01/02/2026 19:45

You don’t love him, sounds like you don’t even like him, yet you’re prepared to have sex with him?
Thats so screwed up!!

TikTokker · 01/02/2026 19:43

It’s a terrible idea

Original poster
ComeAtMe · 01/02/2026 19:42

Im too old to leave and find someone else. H would love a baby in terms of being affectionate and loving, but he would do bugger all to help whether we are together or not. But im at peace with that. I want more kids. I dream of being a single mum with 3 kids!

OP posts:
Marble10 · 01/02/2026 19:38

It’s a difficult one.. is it because you already have 1 with him, you think it’s easier to have the same dad , rather than meeting someone new and doing it all again? How would he react at having another child?