New boyfriend snapped at me

I think it shows aggression from him and an inability to control his temper. I'd have a poor opinion of someone who swore at me in those circumstances. But plenty of people think swearing and shouting at each other in a relationship is totally fine.

And you were wrong not to map read correctly

He sounds a nice guy

Let me guess you don’t drive.
Having to quickly change lanes and exit sharply is horribly unpleasant and dangerous!
Two mistakes on one trip…not good.
Sat nav might be needed if you continue this relationship.

Does anyone live in the real world ? We are all human beings ,,can't say boo without it being 'abuse' ,,it's just normal every day couple stuff op .
This is a non even unless it's accompanied by other disturbing behaviour.

Then what was the point of OP being the navigator?

pretty sure on a 12 hour drive it’s reasonable to share the load no?

What else do you require from him, given that you are still brooding on it?

To me, this’d be a very tiny flareup from a chap whom you go on to reveal as a pretty self-aware and decent type.
After all, you weren't on top of an important brief in the car, and that weighs just as heavily as a moment’s snappy muttering (though ‘heavy’ is overstating both.) A proper apology such as he offered is a good mark in his favour.

I totally agree with you

Feel the OP wants validation how her new partner was mean - which is her prerogative on an online forum.

I can see both sides of the argument but it’s very much down to personal temperament and previous experiences how anyone would react to that situation.

if you’re not compatible as people just let him go and find someone else. You’ll do both of you a favour.

You weren't paying attention when you should have been - I'd have "fuck saked" you too.

Do you drive, out of interest?

I am absolutely shocked and amazed at the amount of people on here who would be offended and upset about their partner muttering FFS to them. 🙄

The guy was stressing during a 12 hour drive and the OP had one job. Give directions! He is allowed to be annoyed and to express that annoyance and it doesn't even sound like the annoyance was even addressed to the OP, it was about the situation in general.

Something over nothing imo. He got irritated because you didn't tell him junction was coming up and he asked. I'd mutter too. Then he apologised as well. Not sure what else you want with a 12 hour drive.

Driving brings out the animalistic side in some people! If he only does this when driving, I would give him some leeway. He was probably stressed. Still not great though that he spoke to you like that. If he speaks to you like this more and more, dump him!

Understand his response. You were supposed to be giving directions and didn't. Seconds on a motorway could have had serious repercussions in terms of driver reaction

Making a point about what? That you are crap at giving directions if you sent him the wrong way at a roundabout and then nearly missed the exit in the motorway?

He apologised so I don't know what point you felt you needed to make.

I think he was pretty restrained given it was a 12 hour drive and you’d already cocked up the directions. Why not just use Apple Maps?

The reason he snapped isn’t important, it’s the fact that he did it and that it comes to him easily during day to day living. My DH is like that, he doesn’t really mean anything by it but I hate it and it creates an atmosphere. I would watch out if this is a normal thing for him and then you’ll need to decide if it’s a deal breaker for you. But make it very clear he should not be speaking to you like this and watch his reaction, it will speak volumes.

This. Not necessarily aimed at you and definitely not snapping at you. What are you like? If you’re feeling offended at this and are overthinking that interaction then I‘d suggest some counselling on your own to help you overcome the damage your ex did.

Next time you’re meant to be giving directions may I suggest putting a type of sat nav on to help you both.

I would. I absolutely hate that kind of thing. It's unnecessary and unkind. Obviously everyone has different levels of tolerance but I'd not want to be with someone who operated like that. My dp of ten years may have thought that many times but he's never once said it.

But why would you need to tell him to 'get over it'?

Did he say those words then sulk or turn it into an argument? If not it seems a very brief moment of frustration that could easily arise between a map reader and a driver who's your partner, friend or family.

But in future I'd say 'why don't you use the satnav?'

It's not ideal but the 'fuck's sake' isn't really the same as 'you fucking idiot' or 'fuck off.' it's more general frustration. I know I utter similar words on occasion. It shows a certain amount of stress and impatience but if that's all he's ever done wrong I wouldn't consider it a red flag.

It's not as if you don't get several miles-worth of signs before the next motorway junction, and/or overhead gantries telling you whether there are feeder lanes for that junction.

He was driving. He should have checked much sooner, and it was his responsibility to be in the right lane in the first place.

So he did a 12 hour drive and you weren't great at the directions, and once he muttered "FFS" and he apologised afterwards (unprompted, or had you sulked/gone cold after this?)?

It sounds more like a bit of tired irritation than anything else, tbh. Unless there's a huge drip feed coming.

So it was a very long drive - did you share any of the driving to help share the strain? And you had given him wrong directions earlier? I think he was clearly stressed and once he had reflected on it he apologised to you. I don't think that's a red flag, I think that's a normal, tired human being. Also you need to start using a satnav - any smartphone will do!