Really disturbed by response to this horrible incident

Don’t be ridiculous, of course I’m not! Have you got nothing better to add?

But who’s to say he was going to attack anyone? I’ve seen many individuals out with two carers. Just because you haven’t doesn’t mean it doesn’t happen. It’s probably more for the individuals safety than others.

Oh yeah, remember when Axel Rubakubana was reported by his school and parents to the authorities as a danger to the public and they sent round 2 full time security guards to make sure he didn't attack anyone and everyone lived happily ever after?

If a man needs two carers to restrain him when he's out in public so he doesn't attack women, he shouldn't be out in public. I don't care what the reasons are. Women are not support humans and background cast for problematic men.

I personally don't buy that this was the case by the way. I live next to a community of adults with learning difficulties and trust me, none of them have 2 on 1 carers.

You absolutely are victim blaming.

Well it’s obviously terrifying. And also rather naive to think this man is going to be accompanied 24/7 never to step in public alone for the rest of his life.

It doesn't. The 2 PAs do.

I was in a pharmacy a few days ago, when a meth head stood right behind me, breathing down my neck. When I turned to see what was happening, he grinned at me manically, with wide, mad eyes. It wasn't a kind smile, although clueless to what he was trying to convey. Maybe he wanted to push in line and get his dose quicker? The point is, it was odd and on the unpleasant side, but so what? Nothing actually happened - it's unfortunate but there are odd and unpleasant people all over the place (with varying levels of MH issues) but it's best not to dwell on it too much, because it would take up all your headspace.

I imagine your friends were being flippant because the alternative is to label yourself A Victim, and what does it achieve? Transport police won't care as they have bigger fish to fry. So your choice is to shrug it off and get on with your day, or worry and get upset.

Completely agree @AmberSpy and the post above me.

@Xoxka perhaps you should step away from this thread. You’re getting some very unpleasant and strange responses.

I know when you’ve been shaken up by a recent incident, the last thing you need is a bunch of people minimising and dismissing your experience. Especially when the people you know irl have kind of done the same thing too.

I once posted about a negative OLD experience with an extremely creepy guy and I had some awful responses in the first page that almost made me doubt myself, until thankfully some decent posters joined the discussion and showed some empathy.

Why is almost everyone missing the point of OPs post? She is asking about the response she got from women when she told them she felt intimidated and scared. Instead of comforting her, they said she should take it as a compliment.

Now, posters on here are finding all kinds of reasons and excuses for this man acting as he did.

Even if a mentally ill person intimidates a woman, the woman still feels intimidated and should be offered support.

OP, I’m sorry it happened to you and I’m sorry that the women around you and on here have reacted how they have.

Men throw acid on women in public spaces. Men grope women in public spaces. A man pushed a woman into the path of a bus in a public space (Putney Bridge attack). A man coughed and spat on a female railway worker in a public space (her name was Belly Mujinga, she later died of COVID). Men trap and sexually assault women in public toilets (look up Daniel Odubanjo).

Many of these vile men will have started with more "low key" events (I'm sure I don't need to remind anyone that Wayne Couzens was a flasher before he became a rapist and murderer).

OP is not being unreasonable to have found this scary and distressing, just because it was in a public place.

Oh sorry. I missed the part where we're being racist because he had an accident.

"What the fuck Sayed"

so many what if’s, but he didn’t grab you or touch you in any way

My first thought it was someone with a learning disability. I have a disabled child myself so do feel strongly that the man should be allowed to participate in life and be out and about- with carers to keep everyone safe. That by no means distracts from your experience of it though! You felt intimidated and that is valid. The reactions you have had put me in mind if that stupid saying boys are mean because they like you. It’s not a compliment if you feel intimidated and normalising accepting poor behaviour if it comes with a compliment is not acceptable

FFS are we supposed to lock people up with mental illness again in asylums to never see the light of day again, Jesus wept!

Nobody is saying it does and the fact that he might have had two carers with him recognise, s thst risk and they prevented an incident.

You and I lived in a very different London in the 90s! That doesn’t make it OK, but the first time someone asked me if I was OK after someone grabbed my boobs I was so confused, it was around 1999. Someone once put their penis on my shoulder on a packed tube ( I was sitting and he was standing), not a single person said anything.

I was harassed, cat called, groped on at least a weekly basis and it was expected that women just quietly accepted it.

I’m so proud of the younger generation now that they don’t just put up with that shit but when people say it wasn’t normal then - it absolutely was for everyone I know.

Ignore comments like this, OP. Some women are so male centred and desperate for male validation they see all male attention as a positive. It’s pathetic.

Similarly some men even in 2026 still seem to think women are going to love their “compliments” too and appear to think it’s their right to give them.

OP should work a bit on her resilience and comfort zone, unpleasant and awful and men etc, yes, but her being “genuinely afraid” in a place full of people while the guy is far away and being immediately restrained is BU

All those saying he was probably mentally ill etc... it doesn't give him the right to terrorise women. He shouldn't be out in public if he's having to be restrained by two men.

From 10 metres away?

This sounds very much like the behaviour of a man my DP was PA to. He was 2 on 1 support and very socially and sexually disinhibited. They often had to restrain him.

The fact that the 2 younger guys immediately grabbed him says to me that they predicted what was about to happen and where trained to respond. Otherwise surely they'd have been more "what the fuck Dave" or not reacted as quickly.

Sorry you were scared but it does sound like he isnt well and the PAs kept you safe.

Yep, as a junior doctor on a ward round the consultant put his hand up my shirt and squeezed by boob, laughed and said “couldn’t resist”, and everyone giggled.