To think my Grammar School DD 2 with an IQ of 119 should be aiming for at least Grade 7's in all her GCSE subjects.

My DD is year 9 at a selective private school and honestly GCSE grades have not even been mentioned yet - I'm not sure why you're so obsessed with them.

My elder two are through GCSEs (state if that makes a difference) and other than getting them to the next stage noone has ever been remotely bothered about what they got other than over competitive parents who want to compare.

I have no idea what any of their IQ's are - how do you even find out?!

So you want her to be at school 8 hours a day and then do 2 hours a night homework on top of that every night - that's absolutely crazy! My child is in a school where they send a lot of kids to Oxbridge and they do no where near that much homework every night. When does she get to relax and just be herself or socialise?

Grammar school child. Those who get into grammar schools tend to have the ability to get 7s at GCSE.

Why didn't she sit her year 6 sats, if she's currently in year 9 then she should have done that. My son is currently in year 10 and he sat his year 11 SATs only 2 year groups didn't sit them - the year group that have just left and the current year 11's!

It doesnt matter what she thinks she’ll get in year 9.

My DD had to set her personal expectations in year 9. Her teachers also had to record her attainment target based on current performance. My DD went low, her teachers went high as they have years of experience under their belt and my DD was just being conservative.

For example, my DD predicted herself a 6 for English literature. Her teacher set her 8. She actually achieved a 9.

Once they get into year 11 they really start pushing themselves and the school is all over it. You are needlessly worrying about this way too early.

For reference my IQ is around the same as your daughters and I got B/As in my GCSEs. IQ doesn’t always equal better results.

Sounds like she’s under confident but pushing her too much could cause her to crack. It’s a hard one between reach her potential and not putting too much pressure on. Keep reassuring she’s capable should try her best and you will be proud not matter her grade as long as she gives it a good shot

You are being very unreasonable for being such a pushy, cold parent.

My DS took a dip in yr9. He viewed it as he last year he could relax before it all got serious. He then "locked in" for his current yr10.
I wasn't worried in yr9 I supported his view. He did about the same level of homework per week yours does per day.
He's now got predicted grades of all 7,8,&9s. More than enough for 6th form.
There's more than enough pressure from yr10 let your DD have a break. Let her enjoy school and be a teenager!

Fear of failure maybe

Unless she wants a specific career that states specific GCSEs of a high grade she only needs to get what she needs to do the next thing that she wants to do. No one has ever asked for my GCSEs after the age of mid 20s. I got loads of As but all seems pointless tbh.

My eldest just did his junior cert, and apart from encouragement/offering revision books/quiet/anything else he needed to help him out I left him to it! I certainly didn't badger him about how many hours he's spending on his prep, or do anything more than discuss what his predicted results were and tell him I had my fingers crossed for him. He got good results (not the best, but well above average, and enough for what he needs).

You don't need to max out every exam, focussed effort is much more sensible

Just keep being positive and telling her she can.
Keep reinforcing that she doesnt have to wrote herself off. She tries her best and keeps on going.

It’s not clear whether OP’s DD isn’t doing her homework (well) or whether she’s just not sticking to some arbitrary time set either by the school or OP.

Maybe she just feels under too much pressure

Am I missing something - when I did GCSEs we worked to do our best but I wouldn't have been trying to predict our grades in year 9. My parent certainly would not have even known where to start. You may get a reasonable idea of their likely outcomes when they do the mocks in the same year they sit the GCSEs but this is all way too early. Just encourage your daughter to enjoy school, pay attention, follow her interests and do a reasonable amount of homework (an hour a night seems plenty).

You seem a bit obsessed tbh. Timing your daughter's homework time to make sure she spends 1h40m on it, already discusing with her what she should get in her gcses before she has even chosen them. Chill out. It will be fine. The happiest, and even the richest people I know are NOT those who got the best gcse results. Let her know you believe she is capable of achieving good results if she puts her mind to it, but accept that whether she puts her mind to it will be largely up to her.

I attained mostly the equivalent of grade 6 GCSEs (B) with a couple of 7s (A) thrown in. Did slightly better at A-Level and then got a 1st class degree at a red brick university. In other words chillout a bit!

I've got an above average paying job but to be honest I think in today's world, Trades might actually be the sensible way to go depending on your child's aptitude and interests.

I was also going to ask this @redange? I have DC in Y11 and Y9. The Y11 did not do them due to Covid but the Y9 definitely did.

I think she is going to have to knuckle down to the 2 hour homework routine if she wants good results. It really isn't that much - even when I was 7/8 at prep school, we had homework every night, including learning how to spell 10 words which we were tested on the next day. Whilst working towards exams at 15 and 17, we had LOTS of homework every night and at the weekend too! You get used to it.

My ds is in y9 he did SATS
they're young they don't get it yet, ds head is in his arse over sport and Xbox still and says the other day what's the point of getting more than a 4 it's a pass - he didn't like my response.
It's frustrating but I expect at his age I was the same and I have a postgraduate qualification and his dad does too.

Maybe give the kid a break?

You are putting her under pressure to set herself aspirational targets for exams that are still two years away. You're comparing her to her sister and her classmates. You want her to do 2 hours of homework every night after a full day at school. No wonder she feels she has to manage your expectations when it comes to her grades.

When kids have parents who put them under intense pressure to achieve it usually goes one of two ways. They either become obsessive, anxious and perfectionistic to the point that they work themselves into the ground and beat themselves up for making even small mistakes, or they go completely the other way and stop trying altogether, they bury their heads in the sand and pretend not to care because what's the point in trying when you're never going to be good enough?

Do you only care about grades or do you want her to love learning? Because you're running the risk of turning her off learning completely by focusing everything on attainment. What are her interests and passions and how can you help her to nurture them? How can you build her confidence?

You need to focus less on numbers, predicted grades and comparisons with her sister and focus more on protecting her emotional wellbeing and your relationship with her.

If she is at a grammar school, she’s in the top 20% of students within your area. Grade 7+ is manageable in most subjects for about 17-25% of all students nationally so yes, that’s not an unreasonable expectation. She needs to feel supported rather than harassed, though.

I agree. I have an IQ of 142 but failed all my O levels. Just wasn’t interested I suppose

Just to add, I was "gifted and talented" and predicted A* and A grades at GCSE, then the same at A-Level. I massively "under-performed" because to me it was a complete waste of energy and effort going above and beyond to get grades I didn't need.

I think its weird to be so fixated on it at this early stage. At any stage really, but especially now.

If she doesn't go to 6th form there she'll do something else. GCSEs really don't matter in the grand scheme of things. Everything is just a stepping stone to the next stage and as long as she gets what she needs for that, there's no issue.

And I stress it's what she needs, not you.