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Friends asking for their money back

370 replies

Nicolasaa9 · 29/01/2026 11:41

Hi, I am not even sure if this is the right place to post this, but I really need to vent.

My two closest friends and I planned to go to an event together. I live in London, one friend is in Hertfordshire and the other lives up north. We agreed to book it in Leeds, get a hotel, and make a proper girls weekend of it, especially as the friend up north is usually the one travelling south.

Both friends have now said they are too unwell to go. They asked me to put their tickets up for resale, which I have done, and have also asked me to pay them back for their share of the hotel even though I am still going.

The hotel is non refundable, and I used around £200 of my own points to book it. There was an extra £60 to pay, which I asked them to split between them at £30 each, which felt fair given the points I used.

They are now asking for that £30 back. I am still going because I have wanted to see this event for ages, but it means driving four hours to something I could have reached in ten minutes on the tube, and spending the weekend alone.

Am I being unreasonable in feeling this is unfair

OP posts:
beAsensible1 · 29/01/2026 12:20

Have they not paid for the tickets?!!!

pouletvous · 29/01/2026 12:19

Do not sell their tickets on their behalf

that is their ballache to manage

beAsensible1 · 29/01/2026 12:19

No. If you pull out of a group trip you don’t get the money back.

because what your actually asking is for your mates to pay your share. If they’d booked separately they’d still have to pay. Cheeky cows. It’s non refundable. So no.

pouletvous · 29/01/2026 12:19

Cheeky fuckers

how ill are they that they can’t power on anyway?

Delphiniumandlupins · 29/01/2026 12:15

Not sure if you paid for the event tickets too but they also owe for them.

PGmicstand · 29/01/2026 12:14

RandomMess · 29/01/2026 11:43

I would just say the hotel is non-refundable so if you cancel altogether then they will need to compensate you for their share of the full £260

I agree.
They may not have been able to avoid being unwell, but they should be prepared to lose the cost of tickets and accommodation in that case - it isn't always easy to sell tickets on and most hotels don't refund at short notice.

chunkyBoo · 29/01/2026 12:13

Tell them its Non-refundable

ByQuaintAzureWasp · 29/01/2026 12:13

Rainbowsandlollipops1 · 29/01/2026 11:56

Just say “get better soon, that’s a shame you can’t come now. The hotel is refundable and now I’m going to the event alone/ stay alone which isn’t ideal but understand these things happen. I can’t afford to pay you back as that means 1 person paying for a hotel for 3 people”

Non-refundable!

Lonelyumbrella · 29/01/2026 12:12

I’d tell them you aren’t going now because they aren’t so the hotel costs need to be split evenly therefore you can’t refund them.

slashlover · 29/01/2026 12:12

WeirdyBeardyMarrowBabyLady · 29/01/2026 11:43

Sorry! I pressed the wrong option without my glasses on. You’re definitely not being unreasonable in the slightest. They’re being ridiculous.

You can change your vote, just click the other one.

YANBU OP.

Delphiniumandlupins · 29/01/2026 12:11

Just because you had points to use towards the hotel doesn't mean it hasn't cost you. The hotel is nonrefundable so they don't get anything back for that. They can try to resell their own tickets. You might be better to resell your own ticket and rebook nearer to home unless you fancy a weekend in Leeds.

If you find someone else to go with you and help pay some of the hotel that would be great but I still wouldn't refund them anything unless you were actually in pocket.

WaltzingWaters · 29/01/2026 12:09

Have they at least paid for their tickets which you’ll refund if they sell? Or will you be out of pocket for their tickets too?
Either way, they’re being incredibly unreasonable and utter CF’s in asking for £30 back, when you were incredibly kind in paying the other £200 (even if it was in points). Please don’t repay a penny to them for the hotel, and rethink planning anything like this with them again.

Wrennie24 · 29/01/2026 12:09

It’s not that you are saying no, the hotel is non refundable so why should you lose out on refunding them on something that is non refundable. Do they not understand that? No matter how many go or don’t go, the hotel won’t give money back.

Rainbowsandlollipops1 · 29/01/2026 12:08

Nicolasaa9 · 29/01/2026 12:03

I did think about selling my ticket and suck up the loss of my points but the other two tickets haven’t sold yet and then I’ll be down by almost £300 for ticket and hotel so I’m just going to go and make the most of it. Annoying but oh well

Wait… are you paying for their tickets too???

kiwiane · 29/01/2026 12:05

They’ve let you down and shouldn’t do so at your expense.

Dollymylove · 29/01/2026 12:04

Definitely not unreasonable. Its not your fault they are both conveniently ill at the same time. Tell them to suck it up

Nicolasaa9 · 29/01/2026 12:03

I did think about selling my ticket and suck up the loss of my points but the other two tickets haven’t sold yet and then I’ll be down by almost £300 for ticket and hotel so I’m just going to go and make the most of it. Annoying but oh well

OP posts:
HoppingPavlova · 29/01/2026 12:03

Nope. It’s non refundable, so that’s that.

BustyLaRoux · 29/01/2026 12:02

So the cost of the hotel was £260 altogether. Or £87 each. You subbed them both by £57 each. Which you were happy to do as it meant spending time with them both. Technically they both owe you £57 which I would want back seeing as the only reason you subbed it was to spend time with them. Time which they have now withdrawn. They have lost the cost of the hotel whether you go or not.

I would pretend I wasn’t going and bill them for £57 each!

Notonthestairs · 29/01/2026 12:02

Quite a coincidence that they are both too unwell to attend.
No I wouldn’t reimburse them.

SENmumof22026 · 29/01/2026 12:01

cheeky fuckers, just tell them no. Highly suspect they both can’t be arsed, whats the chances of them both being ill at the same time?

Nicolasaa9 · 29/01/2026 11:58

Thank you all I just needed some reassurance I wasn’t being mean in saying no

OP posts:
GasPanic · 29/01/2026 11:57

I would try selling your ticket as well and rebook for the closer one.

Even if it costs you £50 or so it will probably be less expensive than the petrol.

I would also not refund these people.

Why are they going to be ill, co-incidentally at the same time and when this event is on ? If they have a good excuse fair enough.

Otherwise I would suspect this is some sort of nasty plot to be unpleasant to you.

I would be ditching them as friends. As I friend I would be happy to give up my £30 in apologies for the inconvenience caused if I was in their situation.

Rainbowsandlollipops1 · 29/01/2026 11:57

Scully01 · 29/01/2026 11:56

I had this with one friend, paid her back but we don't speak anymore, she seemed to think I'm loaded and it wasn't a big deal.

My friend did this. 5 of us paid to stay for a hen do, she had to pull out last minuite and asked us all to give her a bit of money back for her share!!!

MajorProcrastination · 29/01/2026 11:56

I'm sorry. What. This is most clear YANBU for a while! Print off this page of replies and show them!