Menopause - at what point did you go to the Dr's?

I went to the Dr's last year at 42. I had had 3 rounds of failed ivf in the year and a half before and put down my moods, rage, loss of libido, insomnia and weight gain down to that. Then the hot flushes started! My gp was brilliant and referred me to the practice gynaecologist and I was diagnosed with early menopause and on HRT within 6 weeks. My hot flushes have stopped and my moods are more even. Both my mum and grandma had osteoporosis so hopefully starting early will help me not go down that path.

This is a great thread as its telling me symptoms I didn't realise were symptoms! Will be seeking a mythical doctors appointment tomorrow!

I realised I was in perimenopause at around 44 when my periods went from being fairly light and very regular to much heavier, erratic and totally unpredictable. I put up with this for 18 months then decided to talk to my GP, who recommended a Mirena coil. It worked like a charm and I never had another period. It was worth getting the appointment. I didn't feel the need for HRT at that stage, though I did start it a few years later.

I didn't, but I had the easiest menopause ever so wouldn't have considered using resources other women needed much more than I did. I think if it feels not normal for you, it's worth getting it checked out.

Asked my GP, with reference to NICE guidelines. She said that GPs’ prescribing guidelines are that they will not prescribe testosterone unless it has been privately prescribed first and shown to have a positive impact. So I paid £250 to see a private gynae, got a private prescription once (about £30) and thereafter my NHS GP has prescribed it on the NHS.

Likewise. Never.

I've not been yet as my symptoms are manageable. I get the odd hot flush, my energy was zapped for a while but it seems to be okay at the moment (I just altered my routine a bit so early morning gym sessions turned into lunchtime gym sessions so I got longer in bed). I do get brain fog at times and really struggle remembering words but it not bad enough that it affects my life.

The anxiety comes and goes. When I first hit perimenopause my anxiety went through the roof (that was a scary time) and the rage was unbelievable. However, 4 years on and I've worked out how to deal with it.

The periods started as unpredictable, i track though so I'm never usually caught off guard. They were really long and heavy for a bit then they went back to some kind of normal and have stayed like that for a year now.

Whenever I've taken the contraceptive pill I've always had negative side effects (they made me into a monster) so I don't like taking anything that may affect my hormones so am hoping hrt won't be needed.

My mum never took HRT, my sister does.

Never felt the need to.

How did you get the testosterone?

Well my mum is in her 70s and her generation all seemed to be on valium so I will take HRT over that. Not everyone will need it but why do people always feel the need to judge women for taking something that will improve their lives both physically and mentally? Keep on suffering women, always seems to be motto

Thanks for not reading my post. I specifically said that other women might have different experiences.

And i'm 69. Yes, some women took valium , not ALL. And yes, it was a problem.

The problem with mn is the lack of nuance. I think that some women have a shit time during the Menapause, and thank goodness there is medication to deal with it.

But that is now viewed as the default position, and drug companies are making £££ from that.

You don’t become “dependent” on HRT. The change/shortage in hormones affects women differently and you may be one of the lucky ones who sails through the hormonal changes with minimal impact. Or you could be one of the unlucky ones where the changes literally turn your life upside down and you can barely function. It’s estimated that 1 in 10 women find it so debilitating that they have to stop working because they literally can’t function.

I started peri around 48. Suffered a fair bit initially but made some lifestyle changes that helped somewhat. I'm not anti meds, I'm on long term antidepressants. But it was just never so awful that I felt I needed HRT. I'm 56 now and literally just hit the one year mark of no periods this month. So assume that's it now for me!

Literally the only thing that's still a bit of a pain is that I still get really hot at night. But in this weather I just open a window and in summer I have air con in my bedroom!

I started HRT last year. I was 51. I thought I could sail through the menopause until the hot sweats started. If they had been during the day, I would have coped, but they were all night long and after about 2 months of no sleep I'd had enough. I went on HRT in May last year, and I sleep like a baby.

I'm 51 and I've been recently.

I wasn't even sure that it was perimenopause. I don't have hot flushes, I haven't 'aged' significantly, I haven't experienced menopausal weight gain, my tolerance of.others hasn't changed and I haven't got the rage... I still have regular as clockwork periods.

My sleep is a bit shit though, my joints ache and I have brain fog. But I still didn't really feel the need to go.

The GP said my age will put me in perimenopause even with regular periods and lack of common symptoms so she's going to try me on HRT.

As much as anything, reduced oestrogen can have an impact on heart health, bone density, muscle mass etc - things you generally can't see or aren't necessarily aware of until you have a heart attack or break a bone.

HRT isn't just about addressing obvious symptoms it's about the changes happening in your body whether you can see them or not.

That's why I initially went to the GP because older (and wiser!) women told me to!

I'll give it a go and see how I feel. I'm also a bit wary of natural processes being pathologised but I also don't want to come a cropper one day health wise if it could have been avoided.

I was 48 when I went to see my gp as I felt anxious for no reason, out of nowhere. Sometimes it felt like palpitations in the middle of the night. Then I started getting absolute rage. Also feeling incredibly low, like feeling I might walk out and not come back low. So I went and was put on hrt patches, all of those symptoms eased. I’m almost 50 now and still having regular periods although they are starting to get a bit funky - longer, earlier, bit of random spotting!

Similar here. I'm 48 and no particular symptoms of menopause aside from flooding periods and a few little niggles. I'm not against HRT at all but I dont want to make myself dependent (physically or psychologically) on medication if I don't need to.

A friend started HRT quite young and forgot to take the meds with her on a 2 week holiday abroad which led to her having a terrible time with heavy periods and mood swings when she should have been having fun with her kids. I also remember the medication shortages during covid and all the desperate women on the news doing 100 mile round trips to try and get their prescriptions.

Its a personal decision but I note on MN a real push towards criticism of women who don't take it.

Unfortunately there is clear evidence that menopause symptoms suffer the reverse placebo effect and if you go around telling everyone that it’s awful a LOT more people will find it aweful

placebo effects can be 30% of any benefit Or symptom.

46 is young for menopause so in your shoes I would insist on HRT for future bone health / evidence is very clear here

my mum is in her 80s and takes neither hrt nor vallium. Her doctor wanted her to try HRT or drink lots of milk. She went for milk. But she was mid 50s not mid 40s

Well my mum is in her 70s and her generation all seemed to be on valium so I will take HRT over that. Not everyone will need it but why do people always feel the need to judge women for taking something that will improve their lives both physically and mentally? Keep on suffering women, always seems to be motto

Never, and noboby in my friendship group. But we are all older women, and the Menopause is becoming steadily more pathologised. If i was feeling cynical i would say it was in the interest of certain organisations to sell drugs.
But i do appreciate that some women have difficult a menopause.

Following as I’m not sure what to do either. For some reason I don’t fancy HRT - I’ve not got on well with many medications. But I don’t feel right in my body.

i’m 43 and on the Mirena which dealt with flooding periods. I still bleed on it but only for a couple of days, my bleeding is now totally erratic. It has also cured the night sweats I was getting, but it’s caused as massive increase in vaginal discharge which I don’t like (albeit maybe better than dryness?)

But the rage and the brain fog are real, and i’m having trouble with body aches/stiffness and tendinitis.

I can’t decide whether to go to fight the GP for HRT or just wait the 16 months until I turn 45 when it seems they’ll hand it out like sweets.

How long can you/should you stay on HRT if you start it young?

If you’re not planning on HRT, then why go to the Drs? Perimenopause is not an illness.

Personally though, I think you should consider HRT. I didn’t bother until I was 53 and wish I’d done it earlier. My anxiety and insomnia were helped greatly by it.

Theres a new article about menopause contributing to Alzheimer’s, so that’s another reason I take HRT!

I begged for help when it took me over 6hrs to stop shaking with rage after someone cut me up on the main road.

I'd noticed my sweat smelled, and that my sleep was all over the place but the rage, oh the rage..... I work in a profession that requires me to be squeaky clean and I was absolutely convinced I'd go to prison if I ever let go of my temper.

Now I'm on HRT, no more resurgence of murderous temper.

ETA - I started age 43. I have vaginal pessaries for repeated UTIs and not had one since, Mirena coil for progesterone and topical oestrogen gel.