DH thinks he should have an office space kept clear at home

But he doesn't have to 'shift things around regularly'. 2 calls a month is not regularly

I was wondering this...

I think it also depends on the urgency of the calls and how much advance notice he has. If he's having to deal with something urgently and needs to be able to do it then and there then I can absolutely see why he'd be annoyed at having to wait for you to clear him a space.

I wfh multiple days in the week and I always clear everything away into my work bag at the end of each day (because I work from the kitchen table and will need to clear it for dinner) so I'm wondering why you'd need to have stuff consistently spread across two work stations in two different rooms?

Oil filled radiator in the upstairs

i wouldnt want to have to keep setting up in my own home, its bad enough at work

She's explained it clearly. The loft room is normally best for being the most quiet, but the basement room is better when it's cold.

Why would anyone not work in the best space for their needs on the off chance this might be the day your spouse wants to use the desk for a call

Are there two desks in the basement? If so, YABU, just leave one desk to him. If there’s only one desk down there and it’s warmer, YANBU, he needs to share.

This sounds like one of those things that happen in a relationship where you back yourselves into a corner and no one is willing to lose. For what it’s worth, I think you’re being really ridiculous. Sort out where you’re working and let him keep his desk as he likes. You have the luxury of multiple options and it sounds like he’s happy to take second choice, he just wants you to leave it alone. Fair enough!

I work from home 1.5 days and my husband 3. He has the office desk and I work wherever - dining table, couch, etc. I don’t touch his desk even though he’s almost never here when I am. I think unless specifically set up for hot desking, it’s very annoying to shift things around regularly.

Also seems like you could just figure it out - get some lamps or another heater or a heated throw… etc etc.

He’ll have to manage his hurty ego by plugging in the monitor when needed. For heaven’s sake!

This

One desk each sounds fair and normal.

One could also ask, on what planet does someone need two desks for use depending on what mood she's in, and never keeps either tidy?

If the OP would tidy up after herself, this wouldn't be an issue.

Just tidy your shit up and plug the monitor back in when you're done. It doesn't feel like an unreasonable request when your alternative is leaving your stuff spread over 2 workspaces.

Are people not catching that his use of the desk is 2 evening calls a month???

On what planet does someone need a dedicated desk for a couple hours a month.

If you work from home so much more, you should be able to use the room which makes more sense at that part of the year.

However, having to specifically ask you is a bit annoying.

Would it be possible to adjust the downstairs one with an extension cord and some shelves, so it would be easier to keep it mostly ready for either of you?

Surely you can improve the lighting in the basement and then leave the desk in the attic clear for him?

I have to do it every time I go the office. That is a couple of times a week. It never stops being annoying for me. It just makes the starting work hump so much bigger to get over, compared to at home where everything is as I left it.

Tidy up and keep a clear desk, and leave his alone.

This thread is bonkers! OP you are right, I can only think these replies are from people who don't WFH or have never hotdesked.

There is no way someone who needs a desk 2 evenings a month should take precedence over someone WFH every week. The desk would just be a shrine to his non use of it!

Get a power cord so you never have to unplug his stuff, keep the area tidy but do not stop using it.

2 things on this thread I don't get. Firstly, the whole concept of leaving stuff set up and plugged in all the time. One doesn't do this in work office spaces since green initiatives came in about 15 years ago, so why at home? Secondly, all these cold Victorian houses.If you have rooms that are that cold, it is solvable. I wfh in a really old house in a north facing room and I'm not cold.

Either get a blanket for upstairs or a laptop ringlight for the basement. Plus an extension cable for his monitor. None of this is expensive.

If you were hot-desking, you'd have to clear your desk every day surely? YANBU to want to move desks on days when your DH isn't using either, but YABU to leave your stuff spread over both desks.

I agree with your DH. Everyone in our house has a desk at home, even the 3 year old! I don't wfh ever but I need my own desk space for admin and make piles of paperwork I need to deal with, I absolutely couldnt tolerate sharing it with DH.

It is much nicer to work from home when you have a dedicated desk area that you don't have to assemble IT equipment each time and where you can leave some of your personal items out. You have the ability to work where you want in the way that you want, but you don't think it's reasonable to grant DH the same courtesy?

One workstation each is reasonable. It sounds like the attic is better so you just need to heat it. DH can have the basement.

Of course you should have a desk each. A desk isn’t just for WFH you need it for your pc and admin.

Just choose a desk and stick to it. If upstairs is cold but has better lighting, then get better lighting for the basement or insulation for the upstairs room.