Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do?

342 replies

9champions · 28/01/2026 18:50

I’ve lived in my house for almost 4 years now, and I had a new drive put in last year, which cost a fair bit. Parking on my street isn’t great anyway, but I’ve recently noticed that my neighbour is using my drive to get to hers. I’m not sure if she’s always done this as I’ve only just noticed. Last week, I caught her in the act while I was outside sorting the bins, and I think she was surprised to see me. I talked to her on Sunday and politely asked if she could stop, but she said it’s difficult for her because her neighbours car sticks out into the space in front of her house, which makes her partners van hang over their drive, so she can’t get in and out without driving over mine.

They can’t park the van on the drive and the car on the street because there’s a fence between our driveways, and the van is too big to fit with the fence there. It’s their fence, on their boundary line btw. I suggested they take it down, but they’re tenants and don’t want to pay for it, which is understandable. Apparently, they asked the landlord a few months back if he would remove it, and he said he was fine with it being taken down, but he wouldn’t cover the cost.

I was thinking about putting up my own fence to stop them, but my drive is already pretty narrow, and then there's the cost involved. I know I could just pay to have theirs taken down, but should I really have to fork out money just to make them stop using my drive? I know it’s a hassle for them, but they should either talk to their neighbours to see if they can leave them more space on the road or have another chat with the landlord about the fence. They’re making this my problem, and I don’t think it’s fair for them to just assume they can use my drive forever. It’s not a shared drive btw. They’re just next to each other, similar to new build estates.

Am I being unreasonable / petty, or are they taking the piss? I’ve attached a diagram. The black squiggles are cars, and the red one is my neighbours car crossing over my drive to get to hers.

Neighbour using my drive, landlord won’t help. What can I do?
OP posts:
SnowyRock · 29/01/2026 01:07

HelplessSoul · 28/01/2026 18:52

They are taking the fucking piss.

Block access with planters. Much cheaper than a fence.

Also, strategically place your bins where she crosses your drive / park your car there so she cant cut across.

Your NDN is a fucking cunt of the highest order.

Why? Shes driving over it not parking on it. I wouldnt have an issue with a next door neighbour doing that?

ReadingSoManyThreads · 29/01/2026 01:04

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:24

It's the neighbours husband who's obstructing their own driveway. There isn't room for his van but he parks up anyway.

Oh yeah, sorry. Then she'll need to get her partner to park elsewhere! She's cheeky driving over OP's drive. It would piss me right off.

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:03

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

Exactly.

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:02

tamade · 29/01/2026 00:53

Ask yourself, can you live with it?

Really the problem, if problem there be, is being caused by the NDB1N. So if you can't live with it you and NDN could form a posse and go over to see them, put the frighteners on them, sounds like her DP has a van so probably a bit of rough; take him.

That is not OP’s job.

nomas · 29/01/2026 01:01

9champions · 28/01/2026 22:34

Thanks! I know I asked if I was being unreasonable, and I get that everyone is different - some things bother some people more than others. But honestly, I find it hard to believe all those people saying it wouldn’t bother them at all, especially if their neighbours haven’t been helpful or accommodating in the past.

Anyway, the bins are sitting at the top of the drive, and she’s not home right now. There’s no way she can squeeze through that gap without shifting them, so we’ll just have to wait and see what happens!

Well done, OP.

The amount of people not comprehending your excellent diagram is bizarre.

Also note the people who called you petty don’t bother commenting on your neighbour’s behaviour to you.

WorkingMum90 · 29/01/2026 00:57

People driving on driveways? Whatever next!

You should probably start parking on the road OP, that'll help reduce the wear and tear...

Be sure to invoice the postman and delivery people every time they have the cheek to walk across it too!

😂🤣

tamade · 29/01/2026 00:53

Ask yourself, can you live with it?

Really the problem, if problem there be, is being caused by the NDB1N. So if you can't live with it you and NDN could form a posse and go over to see them, put the frighteners on them, sounds like her DP has a van so probably a bit of rough; take him.

ThoughtsOnLife · 29/01/2026 00:37

It is not about a few centimetres of concrete. Its about entitled people using the property of others when they have been asked not to. The broader picture is leaving it as is opens up a potential right of acess to the op's drive by the NDN.

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:24

ReadingSoManyThreads · 28/01/2026 23:46

She's clearly always done this, and you having your drive done meant she wasn't able to drive across it during the works, hence why her drive was unused. You've only just found out about it!

I wouldn't like this either. You could tell her that you revoke any implied permission to your property, therefore next time she uses your drive, she'll be trespassing.

Really though, you need to tell her firmly to never do it again, and that she should be speaking with the neighbour who is obstructing her driveway. If that neighbour is truly obstructing her access, then she can get them towed, or keep reporting them to the council until they finally get it stopped.

As for the fence, I'd be keeping that in place, good fences make good neighbours, and if it gets removed, there'll be nothing to stop them parking over the boundary, leaving you little room to park/get in/out.

It's the neighbours husband who's obstructing their own driveway. There isn't room for his van but he parks up anyway.

CliantheLang · 29/01/2026 00:17

Behold!
A Stepford Mum has arrived to remind us that the only proper position for a woman is on her knees with her mouth open... lest she be seen as - heaven forfend - "passive aggressive and petty".

Thepossibility · 29/01/2026 00:15

Is this a British thing, being possessive over a few cms of concrete? On something that was designed to drive on. Where I am no-one could give less of a shit over something so minor. I'd probably encourage my neighbours to do this if it makes life easier for them. If someone was kicking up a fuss about it we would assume metal health problems.
Maybe it would be an issue if they were driving a massive monster truck but a car? On a driveway, for a second?!

JustCabbaggeLooking · 29/01/2026 00:12

9champions · 28/01/2026 22:34

Thanks! I know I asked if I was being unreasonable, and I get that everyone is different - some things bother some people more than others. But honestly, I find it hard to believe all those people saying it wouldn’t bother them at all, especially if their neighbours haven’t been helpful or accommodating in the past.

Anyway, the bins are sitting at the top of the drive, and she’s not home right now. There’s no way she can squeeze through that gap without shifting them, so we’ll just have to wait and see what happens!

Also there is 'new purchase anxiety'.
I have this. I worry about new appliances etc., everybody in the house has to MAKE SURE THEY TAKE CARE, footprints flattening the pile on a new rug - walking on it! then eventually the anxiety lifts.
I would be bothered too, OP.
But I would also wonder if I wasn't being a teeny weeny bit too bothered, too.

I'd be fuming with her because she let me find out. Ignorance is bliss.
Not being bothered won't give her landlord right of way over your property.
She shouldn't have done it without asking, and neighbour 2 doors up needs to shove up a bit.
None of their problems are your problems, and you've admitted with your old drive you wouldn't care.
It's 'new purchase anxiety' while you're surrounded by thoughtless arseholes and are left working out the cost of every micrometer of mineral worn down by her and her vehicle.
It'll pass.
Even I walk on the rug now.

Imbrocator · 28/01/2026 23:55

OP I think the best way to approach it (if you haven’t already mentioned that you don’t want her driving over your new drive because you’re worried about wear and tear) is to politely and straightforwardly get her to ask her other neighbour to move their car forward a bit, because now that you’ve done your drive you’re planning to spruce things up more by adding some plants out the front, and this is probably going to block her access.

If you just go ahead putting the planters in without speaking about it (but having already raised the drive issue) it’s going to look passive aggressive and petty.

nothanks2026 · 28/01/2026 23:47

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

Indeed, they apparently have the time and think it worth the effort to scold and minimise the concerns of those with whom they do not agree.

Such a non-problem as they can simply scroll by.

If this is all they have to worry about in life, they are very blessed.

ReadingSoManyThreads · 28/01/2026 23:46

She's clearly always done this, and you having your drive done meant she wasn't able to drive across it during the works, hence why her drive was unused. You've only just found out about it!

I wouldn't like this either. You could tell her that you revoke any implied permission to your property, therefore next time she uses your drive, she'll be trespassing.

Really though, you need to tell her firmly to never do it again, and that she should be speaking with the neighbour who is obstructing her driveway. If that neighbour is truly obstructing her access, then she can get them towed, or keep reporting them to the council until they finally get it stopped.

As for the fence, I'd be keeping that in place, good fences make good neighbours, and if it gets removed, there'll be nothing to stop them parking over the boundary, leaving you little room to park/get in/out.

NorthXNorthWest · 28/01/2026 23:40

LucyLoo1972 · 28/01/2026 22:17

I agree with this so much!

So why aren't you both off busying yourselves with more important matters?

Friendlygingercat · 28/01/2026 23:27

OP does not want random people driving across her newly laid drive which is understandable. Not only on principle but also because of extra wear and tear. The solution has been mentioned by many PP above in the form of a large rock or rocks or heavy planter. Personally I would go for the rocks as you can get nice large ornamental ones delivered and they are durable and permanent once in place.. The NDNs problem with the LL is not OPs so no reason to make it such.

JanuaryJasmine · 28/01/2026 23:03

SumTingWongwithme · 28/01/2026 20:21

Good for you but it bothers OP and it is her land.

OP they are totally cheeky, I would never dream of doing this. Deffo go with the planters to stop them. You are right damage can be done over time.

The OP asked for opinions, if you bother to actually read her whole post.

nothanks2026 · 28/01/2026 22:58

9champions · 28/01/2026 21:22

That's not what I said. I have no clue how long she's been doing it for. It could be years or only a month. I have no idea. I don't sit by the window every day keeping tabs. The fact is, I know now and it bothers me. Not sure why we’re arguing over dates 🤷🏼‍♀️

Ignore the twats. Put a camera up and block access is your best bet.

Littlebitlostnow · 28/01/2026 22:54

I think this would annoy me too, and I'd just put something at the end to stop them from doing it. Plants/ my car/ a massive fat off boulder

RawBloomers · 28/01/2026 22:52

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 28/01/2026 22:41

But, coincidentally, they've chosen the solution with zero effort or inconvenience for them, just for you

How does it inconvenience the OP?

It begins to develop a legal right of way that, should it succeed, OP will be required to continue to provide even if her own needs for a drive change and which will make it harder to sell her property. It may also wear her drive, though that will depend on the way it's been laid.

ilovepixie · 28/01/2026 22:51

2026new · 28/01/2026 18:52

Im confused. Does this actually make any difference to you ?

What’s confusing?

sandyhappypeople · 28/01/2026 22:51

TheBroonOneAndTheWhiteOne · 28/01/2026 22:41

But, coincidentally, they've chosen the solution with zero effort or inconvenience for them, just for you

How does it inconvenience the OP?

In the day to day it obviously doesn't inconvenience OP at all, as she hasn't even noticed up to this point. But there will be wear and tear and eventually damage to the corner of the drive that is being used all the time.. which IS an inconvenience to fix, and it will be OP who has to pay for it or live with a damaged driveway.

Lets look at it a different way, if you had a huge driveway for 5 cars and only had two, would you be okay with your neighbour taking upon themselves to park their car on it every day? It's not an inconvenience as it wouldn't impact your ability to use your driveway, but I'm not sure you'd find anyone who would be happy with that?

OPs situation is the same, the driveway is being used every day by people who don't own it or pay towards it's upkeep.

MumOryLane · 28/01/2026 22:50

How petty. Aside from that, it's short sighted to go overly out of your way to make their life harder when you share a boundary. Inevitably something will come up that you will need to work with them with. Even if it's dealt with by the landlord they can be just as petty if you're needing access etc.

ilovepixie · 28/01/2026 22:49

Currentskin · 28/01/2026 18:53

I think your neighbour slightly drives over your drive in order to park fully on her own drive

You think! 😂😂😂 did you not read the post?