First off, I've been with my partner since Feb last year. I have a 7 & 8 year old from a previous relationship, dad not involved & hasn't been for year's. He has a 6yo, he's widowed and has been since just after his son turned 2.
We met when the boys were 3 at the school nursery, they're now Y2
I got pregnant very early on, I'm sure I'll be judged. I don't take contraception like the pill/implant as I physically can't, I haven't found one that works for me. We were using condoms, he had no issue with it and we were when baby was conceived. There was no time we didn't.
We were both initially shocked, but we got our heads around it and decided to keep the baby, his late wife's family have been incredibly supportive too which I appreciate.
I gave birth to our baby last week on the 22nd. Through an emergency c section, we went into hospital for reduced movements, baby ended up in distress, the cord was around his neck. DP lost his wife during childbirth and their little girl, so this was obviously triggering for him. I've told him he can talk to me, he assures me he's okay but I can't help but worry for him and feel guilty in a way.
Anyway, he's been great with our baby, we got home the next day on the Friday, he stayed the night and sorted the kids etc. Then Saturday, my eldest was at respite for the day and overnight (he's autistic and was already planned) and his late wife's family offered to have DS as well as his son like originally planned. I didn't expect this at all but they are close and Bothloved it. It was just us and baby all day Saturday and overnight, then Sunday the kids came back. After he'd picked them up, he got back here and cooked dinner, they all got into their pjs here and we watched a movie, he put my eldest to bed (eldest wanted him to) and took his son home.
Yesterday, he came here in the morning to pick up DS2 and left his car here and took both boys to school, and spent the day here with me and baby and then picked them up, made dinner and went home etc. Today he did the same except he didn't make dinner because his son had swimming and I obviously didn't want him to feel pushed out, DP told me to text him if I needed anything but I've stupidly lied.
Today I've struggled as eldest’s school transport was late and delayed which put Him on edge for the rest of the day, I'm in pain still and really struggled with dinner. I had to get my 7yo to. Help put things in the oven and get them out as I can't bend down. DS1 was crying saying he wants daddy. I know calling him that isn't ideal early on, he's got limited words and he hears his son call him that.
Would it be unreasonable to ask him to move in/at least stay over more? His son has a bed here, we got bunk beds for him and DS2 as they were staying over during pregnancy, not all the time but we did days out and things.