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Original poster

Having a duvet day

65 replies

WineBeforeWhine · 26/01/2026 12:15

Why do I feel guilty doing nothing. I had planned on going out, but it’s so cold outside I decided to stay home. I’m retired and my time is my own, but having a day like this makes me feel guilty that I’ve wasted it. How can I just enjoy a day like this?

OP posts:
LadyLaLaLand · 26/01/2026 12:47

It’s also a learned response - people who feel guilty for this sort of thing have been conditioned since childhood to believe their value is based on their output, and a moral judgement is applied to condition people into thinking busy = good, idle = bad. Even the word ‘idle’ has negative associations attached to it. We seem to treat rest as some sort of moral failing or weakness, which is utterly ridiculous when you think about it.

Wingedharpy · 26/01/2026 12:47

Tell yourself you're a grown up, answerable to none and can do whatever the hell you like as long as it's legal and you're harming no-one.
Enjoy your cosy hibernation day OP.

chellewillnotbebeaten · 26/01/2026 12:39

Just enjoy it! Don’t feel guilty x

LadyLaLaLand · 26/01/2026 12:38

Frankly, everybody should be acting to find more peace and calm in their lives. So much of what people do and expect of others is completely unnecessary. The world is far too stressed, overwhelmed and failing to cope….and much of that is due to ridiculous pressure we heap upon ourselves. It’s total madness.

MadameSzyszkoBohusz · 26/01/2026 12:38

I am trying to do the same, and also feeling guilty, despite the fact this is my first day off in three weeks!!

5128gap · 26/01/2026 12:37

So reframe it in your mind as not a wasted day, but a day of investment in your health. The pillars of wellbeing are good nutrition, excercise, stimulation and rest. Today you're focusing on the fourth.

cupfinalchaos · 26/01/2026 12:36

I’m like you op. I’m also retired and feel guilty when I’m not busy! Think it’s because dh still works. It’s so silly isn’t it? Enjoy your day x

LadyLaLaLand · 26/01/2026 12:33

You feel guilty because you have allowed yourself to be dictated to by what you think ‘society’ thinks you should be doing with your time.

  1. Societal expectations are not rules you must blindly follow.
  2. It is not selfish, nor wasteful to listen to what your body and mind needs and to then act to fulfil those needs.
  3. Societal expectations are shifting anyway - self care and mindfulness for yourself is more present nowadays.
  4. You do not need validation or approval from society, strangers on the internet, nor acquaintances, friends and family members to look after yourself.
Egglio · 26/01/2026 12:26

Don't feel guilty! It's January, it's the month to have a rest.

Maryberrysbouffant · 26/01/2026 12:22

I can’t do those sort of days either without feeling riddled with guilt.

So to get over that, I do wrap up and go out for a good walk, then come back for a hot bath and chill for the rest of the day. Still mostly a duvet day!

K0OLA1D · 26/01/2026 12:21

MakeYourOwnSunshine · 26/01/2026 12:17

You can still go out when it's cold, just wrap up. I WFH and I would go stir crazy if I didn't get out every day.

Great for you. Not everyone wants to just go out.

There is nothing to feel guilty for

K0OLA1D · 26/01/2026 12:20

WineBeforeWhine · 26/01/2026 12:15

Why do I feel guilty doing nothing. I had planned on going out, but it’s so cold outside I decided to stay home. I’m retired and my time is my own, but having a day like this makes me feel guilty that I’ve wasted it. How can I just enjoy a day like this?

I dont leave the house unless I have to. I love just sitting and reading in any free time I have. Now the dc are older and want to do their own thing, I just enjoy a potter, get any jobs done and sit and read with a brew!

Mistyglade · 26/01/2026 12:19

Enjoy it. You’re doing nothing wrong, it’s January and miserable out there. X

Ihaveneedofwaternear · 26/01/2026 12:19

🙄 Bit of a tone deaf response there from the first poster. A lot of people feel guilty taking a duvet day or not being "productive" - it's drummed into us from the get go to do and achieve and make the most of every moment!!! Doing nothing all day is lush and totally fine, hope you can enjoy it OP

MakeYourOwnSunshine · 26/01/2026 12:17

You can still go out when it's cold, just wrap up. I WFH and I would go stir crazy if I didn't get out every day.

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