To leave friend sitting in her car outside my house as she's arrived 90 minutes early

She didn’t ask to be hosted, she didn’t say I am sitting in a freezing car.

why should a friend drop what she was going to do, because it’s the kind thing to do for your friend.

Never in a million years would I have let my friend sit outside in their car, I would have let them in, left them with a coffee and the tv while I finished work.

Would also add it’s strange to have no time to let a friend in because of interview prep but you do have time to go to mums net and post on your interview time. If she is such a nervous driver (whole other thread re how/if she should continue to drive) she must have planned her day around coming to see you and from your reaction you’ve come across, well, who needs enemies with friends like these

I find that mostly people who come to my home are late rather than early. Depending on who it is I allow about 20 minutes either way before I become "unable to hear" the bell. I make some allowances for tradespeople who can get stuck on a job and ask them to ring/text me if the schedule slips.

This has happened with random people. When I was a tenant and had given notice the agent asked to bring viewers around that evening. I very kindly agreed but stipulated 8 pm to give me time to have a meal and tidy up a bit. They turned up at 6.30. I refused to admit them because I was cooking a meal for myself and they were 1 1/2 hours early for the appointed time. They sat in the car outside and were not pleased. Next day I complained to the agent. She apologised and said there were several viewings arranged but the customers just dismissed the other two houses and thought they could come straight to my house. I told her that viewings would only be allowed at the agreed time. There were no more viewings until after I left. Lesson learned.

I guess you’re both as weird as each other. … I wonder what happened in the end?

Me too
My evening would be completely ruined and I would be very agitated

lol..have many friends?

This would cause my anxiety to go through the roof. I know I should let her in, but if I did the evening would be ruined for me.

Why would anyone assume they would be welcomed in 90 minutes before the agreed time? By arriving so early the friend chose her own waiting time.

Or is it now selfish and unreasonable for people not to drop whatever they are doing or rearrange their own plans to accommodate entitled people who move the goal posts without negotiation?

The friend that she left outside for 90min waiting in the car? 🤣

Or spending the evening with the friend?

Op has gone never to return.

She must have had a feeling she's not welcome early that's why she just sat in her car, it's sad that she felt she had to wait untill you let her in, I can't understand why you would just leave " a friend" sitting out there pretending you hadn't noticed her, that's really odd, I feel sorry for her

She’s annoying but clearly a nervous driver.
It was beyond weird to leave her sitting outside.

How the hell is she going to get home if she's nervous driving in new places after dark?

Meanwhile, she must be bursting for a pee. (Cue indignant post on guest used my toilet!)

Insane behaviour to be so rigid you can't reschedule your planned prep for another time over the weekend to let an invited guest in, however early.

Good solution.

So weird.... no, I would never leave my friends sat outside my house for 90 minutes even if they were 90 minutes early.

Why don't you let her in. Just tell her you can't entertain her yet because you have to prepare for something but tell her she's welcome to sit and wait.
I wouldn't be annoyed with her she is obviously anxious about going to place she hasn't been before in the dark

What happens when it gets dark ? Does the car turn into a pumpkin ?

Of course you don’t leave a friend outside.
I’m surprised you have to ask.

She obviously an anxious driver and scared to drive in the dark especially when she's unsure of how to get there. I can relate. I hate driving. If you are actually her friend then of course you let her in. If you needed to do work you could even just let her in, make her a cuppa, pop the TV on and say you've something to do and you'll be down in 30. YABU

If a friend did this to me I’d just turn around and go home , it’s awful leaving her outside

How d’ya figure that? hahaha

OP 👇
”Seeya at 6! 😌” (all nice & everything)

Only on Mumsnet. Leave her outside OP. Then treat all your friends like this and you soon won’t have any. Problem solved. 🙄

With friends like you who would need enemies? You are weird.

Let her in I hate trying to find an address in an area I’m not used to. Even harder when it’s dark. I rely on Google maps and she must have been desperate for a wee.