To leave friend sitting in her car outside my house as she's arrived 90 minutes early

@youretooearly
Did you let her in yet? 😂

@Pluto46 Absolutely, but the merest, light-hearted hint that the OP might not be 100% kosher will result in a deletion, as just happened to me. My first deleted post - I'm almost proud!

Agreed, so many ridiculous threads of late. AIBU is such a parody lately its inconceivable that the site used to be deemed a series focus group by politicians. Even on the more serious boards like Employment , the few posters that clearly know what they are talking about, and are attempting to give good advice, are drowned out by literal nonsense.

This 100%

Yes agree. Let her in. Make her a tea and get in with what you need to do.

Meeting - the time they agreed friend would meet OP at her house. HTH

.

I remember feeling mortified aged 11 when my parents were late back home for a guest we were expecting, because my parents spent too long nattering after church. It was after 10pm as well - big church service at Easter, so their friend was waiting outside our house late at night. They did not seem ashamed at all.

Coming on mumsnet to let everyone know your ‘friend’ has arrived early and is sat outside is hardly keeping your head in work mode

FFS, yet another waste of time. OP hasn’t returned. Sick of bloody wind up merchants.

Hyacinth Bucket:
”If I say ten forty-five, I expect Elizabeth to arrive first coffee at ten forty-five, and not ten forty-four or ten forty-six.”

When I was about twenty, I hadn’t yet learned that a party invitation meant arriving after the stated time. I was precisely on time, and no guests arrived for more than half an hour! I felt very awkward indeed.

Sure 🤔

If you had to work why are you posting on Mumsnet?

This is one of those things I read on mumsnet and get shocked. No wonder so many people cry of loneliness in this country. There is very little sense of community. How is this even a question? Let her in, fix her a cup of tea and get on with your interview prep. She must have been really excited to come this early.

I have to say the friend sounds a bit clingy to me but hey I'm admittedly an introvert.

Noone knows the reason she turned up so early but if it was me I’d be thinking maybe she’s scared to drive in the dark, maybe she suffers with anxiety, maybe somethings happened at home that she needs to escape from.

I’d have let her in, given her a drink and told her I needed to finish some stuff first. Then I’d take some time as a friend to have a chat about her being so early to see if there are any well being concerns that she’d like to chat about.

She’s probably hiding behind her sofa sobbing and shaking.

I’d let her in but I probably wouldn’t invite her round again. She is likely a nervous driver if she needs to set off this early but why agree to plans that involve driving in the dark in the first place if that makes her so nervous? Quite selfish of her really to make you feel under pressure in this way when she could have just sat at a nearby coffee shop or mentioned the fear of driving in the dark when plans were arranged. She’s the one making this awkward not you. Let her in but make a mental note for next time if there is one.

And that's your right. But other people have different boundaries which is their right. People dont owe you access to their home or themselves. It's polite to establish what is acceptable to someone rather than just imposing what you would prefer on them
Some people are happy having unexpected visitors and contact and some are not
There are so so many reasons for this but at the end of the day everyone needs to respect each other's boundaries abd not just assume.

Imagine she saw this, if I was sitting in a car waiting for any reason then im likely to be flicking through Mumsnet on my phone 😂

Honestly, I've said it before but MN really is a parallel universe. I don't know anyone who would leave a friend sitting outside simply because they were early, but then I invite in people who haven't made an appointment three months beforehand, or people who don't text me to let me know they are coming. Thank goodness I don't live in the UK if this is what your hospitality is like (I do realise that not everyone is like that btw, there are many sensible replies on here.)

It always boggles my mind that when something is happening to someone, the first thought that goes through their head is 'Let me post this on mumsnet/ let me ask MN' 🫨

Good grief! Surely you can invite her in, get her something to drink, and if you must you can get on with whatever it was you were doing - although personally I am more than happy to drop everything for a visitor. Do you actually understand the meaning of friendship? (mind you, this is MN, home of the socially inept so why should I be surprised).