Child’s first birthday

ISO3456 · 2026-01-23T19:30:31+00:00

Thoughts on having a ‘party’ for Childs first birthday at a social club. would be both our family’s (1 set live close, 1 set 2.5 hours away so would need hotels which is close by to venue) and friends (there’s about 6/7 baby under 2) Thinking pies & curry from local bakery & maybe soft play setup for the kids. Not costed up but recon: room hire £75 soft play £150 pies/curry £100 ballon’s and decs £150 maybe missing things, if I have let me know Partner thinks its pointless as baby is 1, clingy to mum/dad & grandparents & doesn’t have a clue what’s going on so reckons we go on holiday instead with the money (last one before maternity ends) Or invest the money in child’s ISA (we’re trying to set our child up so put child benefit in his ISA) thoughts? YABU - 1st birthday party YANBU - Holiday/invest

tsmainsqueeze · 23/01/2026 20:27

I think these types of parties are awful for a very young baby who has no idea what day it is.
Too noisy and chaotic for a baby who will probably spend some of it asleep or whingeing and the thought of a baby being passed around all those people , not for me.

Christmaseree · 23/01/2026 20:25

I agree with the small tea party at home suggestions.

A party in a social club doesn’t sound very good.

MamaagainJuly2026 · 23/01/2026 20:21

MamaagainJuly2026 · 23/01/2026 20:20

I’ve only been to a couple 1st birthdays but BOTH mums said the same. “It was overwhelming and I spent the whole day hosting whilst my child gets passed around”

We had family and friends pop in and out over my son’s birthday weekend. We did party food that cost like £20, got a cake made £60 and spent about £10 on decorations.

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Pay off some debt, and wait until your child’s 3 or 4 then have a lovely party where she will be running around enjoying it all.

SquashPenguin · 23/01/2026 20:21

We had a tea party at home for our daughter’s 1st birthday. I made a cake and we bought some easy buffet food from Asda. A few balloons and sparkly streamers, she had a great time playing with wrapping paper on the floor. We enjoyed it way more than we expected to.

MamaagainJuly2026 · 23/01/2026 20:20

ThatCosyDreamer · 23/01/2026 20:16

I did this for my daughter's 1st birthday and regret it as my only memories are of running around hosting everyone and feeling stressed. I barely saw my daughter. Ever since then we've taken her for a nice day out for her birthday instead e.g. the zoo, and she's now having her first proper birthday party this summer aged 5.

I’ve only been to a couple 1st birthdays but BOTH mums said the same. “It was overwhelming and I spent the whole day hosting whilst my child gets passed around”

We had family and friends pop in and out over my son’s birthday weekend. We did party food that cost like £20, got a cake made £60 and spent about £10 on decorations.

ThatCosyDreamer · 23/01/2026 20:16

I did this for my daughter's 1st birthday and regret it as my only memories are of running around hosting everyone and feeling stressed. I barely saw my daughter. Ever since then we've taken her for a nice day out for her birthday instead e.g. the zoo, and she's now having her first proper birthday party this summer aged 5.

Furlane · 23/01/2026 20:15

If you want a balloon arch, have one for your birthday. I think they are environmentally damaging and I’d much prefer to put the money into a savings account for them as they won’t care about it. First birthdays are about you not the child as they have no idea it’s their birthday. Personally I’d prefer a holiday as that’s enjoyable for everyone.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 23/01/2026 20:12

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 20:08

Partner thinks the same (£475 is too much). currently I’m not being paid due to maternity leave.

We travelled Europe for 3 months during maternity so paying off that ‘debt’. £3600 left to pay, interest free on credit card

But do have savings in stocks we could pay off tomorrow so no money issue really

We may balloon arch, but would need decorations somewhere and maybe cake and party bags for kids

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How many people would you be inviting? You don’t need party bags for the kids, this isn’t a kids party, it’s for a 1 year old in a social club, this is an adults party with kids invited OP. Treat it like the enjoyable piss up it is and put that money behind the bar instead if you insist on spending it

Swaytheboat · 23/01/2026 20:12

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 20:08

Partner thinks the same (£475 is too much). currently I’m not being paid due to maternity leave.

We travelled Europe for 3 months during maternity so paying off that ‘debt’. £3600 left to pay, interest free on credit card

But do have savings in stocks we could pay off tomorrow so no money issue really

We may balloon arch, but would need decorations somewhere and maybe cake and party bags for kids

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Well then it's ridiculous to do that party. You can't sensibly afford it.

Eenameenadeeka · 23/01/2026 20:09

I'd do a smaller party at home, probably just close family with cake and do the balloons myself. Then you can do both.

Original poster

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 20:08

ToKittyornottoKitty · 23/01/2026 19:57

£475 for a first birthday party in a social club sounds a bit much. The baby doesn’t need a balloon arch. But if that sort of money isn’t a big deal to you then fair enough

Partner thinks the same (£475 is too much). currently I’m not being paid due to maternity leave.

We travelled Europe for 3 months during maternity so paying off that ‘debt’. £3600 left to pay, interest free on credit card

But do have savings in stocks we could pay off tomorrow so no money issue really

We may balloon arch, but would need decorations somewhere and maybe cake and party bags for kids

OP posts:

SalmonOnFinnCrisp · 23/01/2026 20:03

We did immediate family round for a cup of tea and a slice of cake.
We got a platter of costco sandwiches, a £10 balloon arch from amazon and a party hat for baby.

cash went into SIPP and JISA.

But if you LOVE getting family together go for it!

ToKittyornottoKitty · 23/01/2026 19:57

£475 for a first birthday party in a social club sounds a bit much. The baby doesn’t need a balloon arch. But if that sort of money isn’t a big deal to you then fair enough

Evaka · 23/01/2026 19:46

itsmeits · 23/01/2026 19:39

It is an each to there own. I do agree baby wont remember it, the baby also wont remember the holiday. Does it matter?
We love a good family party, and have had many different ages snd celebrations in local hall with us all there.

If you can afford it and family are happy to travel, go for it make memories with the wider family, get pictures have fun 👍

Spot on, get family together and celebrate your lovely baby x

Original poster

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 19:45

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 23/01/2026 19:41

You won't be feeding people just a slice of pie though, will you???

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No when I say ‘huge’ they’re like the size of an oven tray

Anybody in north of England would know what I mean

OP posts:

BlueMum16 · 23/01/2026 19:45

Not a chance would I be having a first birthday party in a venue.

Food and cake at home for grandparents.

Parties can wait until school friends.

Unless your looking for and excuse for a piss up, then just do that.

DaisyChain505 · 23/01/2026 19:44

Unless you’re rolling in it this is a complete waste of money. I wouldn’t spend this amount on a child’s birthday party at any age let alone a baby.

Save yourself the stress and hassle and put the money you would have spent in a savings account for your child’s future.

MotherJessAndKittens · 23/01/2026 19:43

TBH first birthday just grandparents at house or baby friendly outside park type place. 2nd birthday similar just a couple of friends though they do start to play a bit at soft play. At 3 they begin to join in more though.

Original poster

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 19:42

ImmortalJillyCooper · 23/01/2026 19:38

You are probably the only person that cares. And if you have a big do I guess it’s likely you might be posting here about being upset that people didn’t brings gifts, or weren’t suitably excited, or similar. So I’d go for the holiday.

Having said this, I understand the need to mark it somehow. And I did enjoy a 1st birthday where clearly it was a nice opportunity for friends to get together and not just worship at the altar of the precious first born.

We’d ask for no gifts at all, we don’t mind about that.

less stuff in the house the better.
grandparents went crazy over Xmas & we said 1 each next year

we only got him 2 books a bath toy and a bike/scooter thing

OP posts:

YouWillNeverGuessMyUsername · 23/01/2026 19:41

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 19:40

Local bakery does these huge pies for about £16-20

need to go price them tomorrow to be sure

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You won't be feeding people just a slice of pie though, will you???

Original poster

ISO3456 · 23/01/2026 19:40

Swaytheboat · 23/01/2026 19:32

Well it will absolutely be very overwhelming for the baby who may spend a decent chunk of it crying, or decide that their nap schedule has changed and they are cranky AF. I'd say you also need to factor in drinks and I think you're under budgeting for pies if you're buying them in. I wouldn't bother personally, we just went on a family day out to a farm for my little ones 1st birthday which was nice.

Local bakery does these huge pies for about £16-20

need to go price them tomorrow to be sure

OP posts:

yeesh · 23/01/2026 19:40

I think it’s a nice excuse to get family together and celebrate

itsmeits · 23/01/2026 19:39

It is an each to there own. I do agree baby wont remember it, the baby also wont remember the holiday. Does it matter?
We love a good family party, and have had many different ages snd celebrations in local hall with us all there.

If you can afford it and family are happy to travel, go for it make memories with the wider family, get pictures have fun 👍

ImmortalJillyCooper · 23/01/2026 19:38

You are probably the only person that cares. And if you have a big do I guess it’s likely you might be posting here about being upset that people didn’t brings gifts, or weren’t suitably excited, or similar. So I’d go for the holiday.

Having said this, I understand the need to mark it somehow. And I did enjoy a 1st birthday where clearly it was a nice opportunity for friends to get together and not just worship at the altar of the precious first born.

Tableforjoan · 23/01/2026 19:36

Unless you have money to burn. The holiday and or isa.