Dads using female communal changing room

Can you explain to me why women wanting men to obey the law is hysteria?

thanks.

Men shouldn’t be in the men’s? Why is that not on? Where else would he go?

Exactly! His wishes, and even his daughter’s needs, do not outweigh the needs of all the women and girls in their own changing room.

My husband would never ever step foot in the women’s changing room. When he took the kids swimming he’d wait outside and my daughter would come out in an oodie or onesie or something easy. Shower and get dressed at home. Obviously that doesn’t work if you’re getting on a bus but there is always a solution that doesn’t involve going into the wrong changing room.

They find it hard because that's not what suits them and they don't give a shit about anyone else.

It's nothing more than selfish entitlement.

There are women who take their sons into the same mens/boys changing room that my son goes into. He is 8. I've mixed feelings about it. I think he and other males are entitled to privacy, but at the same time I think the presence of an adult female means he is safer than if he was just in there with random men. Mixed family cubicles should be available everywhere.

@MotorbikeStuntRideryes I take my son in the men’s (as do the other mums with sons) - it maybe is just ‘normal’ in our specific context (only 4-6 year olds changing, no puberty issues, private pool is for lessons only so no chance of anyone else getting changed etc). It clearly wouldn’t be appropriate in all contexts as evidenced by this thread, but it does happen (I don’t know if men take their daughters in the girls as I’ve not noticed either way).

I’d draw the line if he started praying!

I think most children can change on their own from about 6 - they manage in school.

it won't be perfect, but if parents are sensible and bring easy to wear clothes - joggers and t shirts, crocs, should be doable.

Put a towelling robe over them straight from pool and pop into car and home for a hot shower and change! It’s not brain surgery

He’s taking the piss and hoping women will be afraid to report it. He’s a man. Get him out!

I think this is acceptable only if all the children getting changed are very young, I.e. under 8. If there is anyone- adult or child 8+ getting changed, then no adult should be in the opposite sex changing room.

This is a tough one, because the real problem is that this place is missing family changing rooms! At least the individual ones are big enough for a child and parent. If they are, then a female assisting a boy, or male assisting a girl should use those indeed.
And if the children are over 8 or so, then they can change on their own.

He takes his DC to the men's changing room. If other men object, that's their problem.

An adult man does not belong in a female single-sex space.

You can take your son in the women’s if he is under 8. After that, he goes in the men’s alone. This is the advice for both sexes at DC’s swimming club. Adults use the changing rooms of their own sex, and age 8, children need to do the same.

I don’t understand why people find this so hard.

‘It’s only kids changing’

but it’ll be kids of different ages.
our swim school range from toddlers to teens.
my 11 year old would be mortified and feel quite upset if a man turned up whilst she was changing.

Women don't take their boys into the men's.

I have known this to happen, and I've told the women in question they need to go somewhere else.

Then dad's should find an alternative solution if it bothers them. They are accompanying their child.

Not all the girls in the female changing will be accompanied.

It's not up to the girls to budge up to accommodate the Dads.

Report to reception.

The law is that changing rooms are single sex . There is an exception for children to use the wrong sex if they are too small. There is no exception for adults.

Because some of the older children have rights to privacy and dignity as well as safeguarding from voeuyerism under laws about single sex provision.

This isn't hard.

People claim it's hard because they are entitled twats who don't give a shit about others.

I don't think people have fully twigged that the only people getting changed are the kids.

I certainly hadn't. That makes quite a significant difference. I wonder if the staff are actually telling people they should go with sex of the child not the adult? Arguably no adults should be in a changing room with kids who aren't their own at all, that would be a typcial policy. I also suspect that adults are expected to supervise their kids so sending them alone might not work. It's a minefield.

Either way the pool's policy on this should be on a bit of A4 taped the door becaise people are clearly getting caught out and it's easy to see why. (By policy I mean "The segregation is based on the adults sex, not the person who is changing." or vice versa.)

Some mums did offer to keep an eye on her if he left her in there

I'm not convinced leaving a child with an unknown adult is a good solution either.

A grown man should not be in a room with unrelated naked young girls.

Which is exactly what will happen if the Dads take their daughters into the Boys' Changing room. There's no right answer here.

My main issue is the boys who are old enough IMO to get changed by themselves but the mums clearly aren't ready to let them do so, and are happy for them to stare at the changing girls trying to hide behind towels.

I fear the age the staring/curiosity starts precedes the age they can be trusted to change alone. 🙁

This is interesting because I have the opposite situation, take my daughter to swimming at what is a school pool so only communal boys or girls changing rooms. I'm getting mad with the mums who bring their boys into the girls changing rooms because they (the mums) are women. To me that mum should be in the boys changing room as the only people changing are children.

So to me that would put this dad in the OP in the right place. My main issue is the boys who are old enough IMO to get changed by themselves but the mums clearly aren't ready to let them do so, and are happy for them to stare at the changing girls trying to hide behind towels.

There's no reason for him to be in the women's communal one. He should take his kid into a private booth in either the mens or women's. For her dignity and obviously he might need to get changed also.

I understand he might want to shield his daughter from possibly seeing adult male genitals, but that's no excuse for him to be able to see female genitals of any age.

I guess you need to check the rules. But if there's a chance there'll be naked women there then men shouldn't be.

@RedToothBrushI think it’s not entirely obvious hence op’s post and I think we should be able to discuss without descending into being insulting to each other. My oldest is 5, but I am surprised that you felt comfortable with your 7yo son changing in the men’s without an adult, although maybe I’ll feel differently when my son is 7. The risk of a child unaccompanied in a men’s changing room seems higher to me than the alternative.

He is protecting his daughter at the expense of others. What a gent.
Report him.