OP reminds me of someone I used to be friends with but I started feeling so exhausted and embarrassed by her behaviour I had to end the friendship.
She has teenage girls and is in her 40’s and it’s like she’s desperate to be seen as part of their friend group.
She copies slang they use, buys alcohol for them, gives them sex tips, smokes weed with them and it oozes desperation and immaturity.
Her daughters stopped having friends round because my friend wouldn’t leave them alone and was desperate to join in conversations, if she heard them planning a night out or a trip away she would expect to be invited.
She paid for some of her daughter’s friends to go on holiday with them then wanted to go out clubbing with them and called me in tears saying she felt left out when they went out without telling her. After that she latched onto the club rep in her twenties who was paid to show interest in her and thought they had struck up a deep friendship and commented how she got on with someone younger so much better because they were on the same wavelength. She swapped phone numbers and texted and called her constantly when she got home and invited her to stay with her. When the rep didn’t reply she became obsessed checking she was online and became very depressed and couldn’t handle the rejection, it was very intense and strange and I bet the rep was completely freaked out.
She started bragging about “snap chat streaks” with her kids friends and kept posting pictures with herself with them on insta.
She wasn’t always like that, she used to be quite a sensible woman who didn’t drink and would have judged someone behaving similar to how she is now.
When I was in my twenties and was wild and irresponsible her children were young and she used to say she was glad she was happy and settled and was old before her time, on her hen night she didn’t drink and went to bed at 10.30, her other “mum friends” were similar and very disapproving that I wanted to stay out later and carry on drinking.
It’s like she got bored of her personality and created a new one and she describes herself at fortyteen which makes me cringe so hard.
She also seems desperate to shock people and thinks they are in awe of her when they are actually just confused.
I loved a pps description of saying OP sounds like Pertunia - Brenda’s mum from dinnerladies, I think that’s quite fitting.
I noticed OP using “pissed” instead of “pissed off” and used “Mom” to start with but then reverts to “mum” when she mentioned the mean girls reference.
This is like teenagers using Americanisms because they think it sounds cool.
It made me think of Joey in friends trying to be a 19 year old.
OP you are trying too hard and you might think people think you are this crazy wacky person who is not like the other adults but it comes across as desperation to be admired.
Your “crazy” anecdotes about talking to strangers in a club and a wake being a bit lively are no different to most peoples lives and didn’t have anyone admiring you and feeling envious that we aren’t as complex and and interesting as you.
I sound harsh but your mention of designer clothes being a personality trait screams insecurity like a teenager desperate for the right clothes to blend in - that’s not a compliment and doesn’t mean you could play a 19 year old!
Bragging about partying and taking drugs also reminds me of teenagers desperate to rebel and be admired by peers.
Stop trying so hard and just be you, as multiple people have posted, everyone has different sides to themselves because they learn different behaviour is appropriate for different situations but they are the same person underneath.
If you want friends you need to be authentic, good friendships are built on trust and respect and you don’t have to have every single thing in common or be the same to get on with someone.
People will see through the act you are putting on and are more likely to talk about you than to you.