AIBU to be really pissed off about their behaviour at my graduation?

Congratulations on your graduation. I am so sorry you had such a poor experience and I can really sympathize as my mother didn't exactly enhance my own graduation experience.
I graduated at aged 40 and was the first person in my family to go to university. I had worked hard and done well. One of the tutors had been particularly encouraging during the course and, although he told me he didn't normally attend graduations, he'd made a point of coming to the drinks reception afterwards and coming over and chatting to my family, saying how well I'd done
When he introduced himself My dear mother said 'Oh we know who you are. All we've heard from shiningstar2 this last 3 years is Professor X this, Jeremy that' Honestly I wish the ground would have swallowed me up.
He had been my tutor and we did have a really good rapport ...platonic but same sense of humour ext. I think she was trying to discourage anything going further now the course was finished. Terrible! And as for making it all about her ...well after he left she excelled herself by askingf she could try the graduation robe on ..so I actually have a photo somewhere of my mother in my graduation robes.
It was all many years ago and until your post today I haven't thought about this for a very long time but thinking of it now I do feel a bit sad...robbed a bit of the usual happy banter type conversation I and my family might have had at a time which is normally a celebration. Of course he took himself off quite quickly after that and then we had the photo of DM in my graduation robes.
I'm sorry your DM and your son put a damper on your own experience OP. Well done you. I hope you and your DH have another special celebration together. 💐🍾🥂

Bloody hell, OP, you poor thing: your entire family is barmy and your partner’s a druggie. No one sensible takes a Schedule 3 controlled drug for a mild headache. But that said, it should have been locked up or hidden, not slung loose in a drawer.
Could you not have spent more time with your fellow graduates? Graduation is a bittersweet day: the end of all the work, a celebration of success, but also the loss of friends and colleagues.
Five years is a long course. What’s your subject? I hope it’s something medical/psychological/psychiatric/pharmaceutical; you may find such knowledge useful in the future! 😃

This is also what jumped out from your post!!

I'm missing the point here but , your DH took a tramadol for a headache? A seriously addictive pain killer that is generally only prescribed in short courses for serious pain? Really?

They are boring as fuck tbf!

The ceremony is tedious except for the moment that someone you love steps up to receive their degree. But you also have to sit through several hundred others doing the same.

But you don't moan about it to the graduand. You congratulate them, give them a hug and remember how proud you are. Your lot really let you down.

And yes, Tramadol? That's insane for a headache, unless there's a back story of some horrible condition.

What a pack of dickheads.

Op, I also did my degree over 5 years, I loved my ceremony because it was mine, for me, for all my hard work and millions of late, late nights. I strode across that stage like I owned it. It means the world to me. It should feel like that for you, because you did it, you nailed it, you have succeeded! Well done you. Stuff anyone who thought it was boring, it wasn’t their day, it was yours. You made it, and you should be immensely proud. Focus on the nice cap and gown pictures and if you have none, get some, you can book in at most photography studios. I have my degree on the wall of my office, I look at it every day and feel so pleased and proud. I hope you feel the same because you should. Stuff the family, they tried to do the right thing but hit the mark, let it go, at least they sort of tried! It is your achievement for you. Take yourself off for a day out, afternoon tea, shopping, lunch, whatever floats your boat and pat yourself on the back for a good job well done. Well done queen 👸 xx

Aww that's tough.
In my family, a graduation is equal in terms of importance to a wedding.
Even more so as it's something you've achieved all through your own efforts that can't be taken away from you.
Congratulations OP. Mumsnet is proud of you 👏.
Go and buy yourself a nice piece of jewellery and a bloody big bouquet of flowers.

My family were horrible at my graduation, almost 25 years ago. Maybe I had built it up in my head, thinking it would be a special day, and we’d have a lovely meal.
But my baby brother overslept, my dad insisted on taking the worst route there, and the event felt generally flat. My dad moaned the whole time. I was in tears. Really wished I hadn’t bothered.

My parents horribly ruined my graduation (and my shitty then fiancé). It devastated me at the time because of the selfishness behind it. My parents also did it at my wedding and when my DS was ill so we are no contact now.

I did my MA at 50 which meant I could have a good graduation with my DH, kids and best friend. It was pretty boring and I was too old really but it meant a lot to me because my loved ones cared.

I feel really sorry for you. I’d be really angry with your son and mum. You deserve better. Why don’t you have a graduation dinner with your DH and anyone else who can behave themselves!

How annoying. Yes, they are boring, but what did your family think was going to happen?

This is exactly my question.

Graduations are boring as hell, but they are special days for the people concerned so you act like an adult and behave yourself, dress nicely and make small talk if you are introduced to anyone. A nice lunch is usually the treat afterwards. I would be pissed off too OP.

I went to both of my graduations. The first was with the ou , just me and my DH. and it was a proper party atmosphere but I wanted to escape even though it was me graduating. It was huge and BORING. The second time for my masters I graduated with my sister and family watching. Much smaller. We skipped the after bit and had arranged our own party with all of our family and friend’s. It was fucking brilliant.

i get it’s sad but honestly, go the next step at your own pace and just do your own thing afterwards. I’ve been to multiple graduations as a guest and it really is boring as fuck. Is 3-4 hours to celebrate the person you love for 5 seconds at best.

I was bored stiff during my graduation, I expect my parents were too - hundreds of graduates and a very long boring talk by some guest celebrity whom my parents wouldn't have heard of.

But I have the photo :) parents had one too.

and we went for a lovely lunch afterwards.

What did your dm think it was going to be - a rave?

You’re not wrong to be disappointed OP - they sound a bit crap.

Have to be honest though, we didn’t go to eldest ds’s as it’s really far and he wasn’t bothered about going - I wish I’d pushed it more now as I wanted the photo to put on display!

Congratulations - from now on I would vow to take charge of your own life; I wish you success and happiness in the future.