Who should have been responsible for baby in this situation?

You wanted to be free of the baby to “prepare mentally” for being free of the baby?
No, don’t get it.

Probably at some point over the eeekend she is off on her jollys?

On her weekend away, one might suppose...

I think you were both expecting the type of morning you had pre-baby - a lie in from DH’s perspective and a couple of hours to get yourself ready from your perspective. Realistically, neither is hugely possible! It’s a difficult transition and can cause a lot of resentment if you’re both not careful. Things need to be agreed well in advance so that nobody is surprised and disappointed as happened with both of you today.

Sounds like you both want “ me time “ at expense of poor baby doesn’t sound a great start to their life.

Agree, unless by you saying you deserve me time, he's had lots of weekends away and this is your first break. In that case, you need a discussion about fairness.
But especially if he's the only one working now (I know a lot of people can only manage a few months maternity so I am not assuming everyone gets the best part of a year), I get where he and previous posters are coming from.

If he’d gone to bed at a reasonable hour then I’d say fine but if he’s only had a few hours sleep and he’s going to be up with the baby again tonight then YABU. I would have let him rest this morning, it’s all about give and take when they’re little.

If you are catching a plane then why do you need hours to do your hair and make up? You could always do your make up on the plane.

I think Op is fussing too much about time to get ready.

But it was more than likely her husband's choice to not get in until the time he did, so limited sympathy really.

Some men would get up with their baby so that their wives could get ready in peace though.

If I wasn’t going to see my baby all weekend I’d want to spend every second with them, I’d be actively wrestling my DH If he said “I’ll take the baby”
Also you’re about to get a weekend to yourself, is he getting one?

When he goes away for a weekend does he do all this too in readiness for you being alone with the baby? Or would he just pack his bits and kiss you farewell?

oh you are his assistant? Tell us more about his business and his planning, we can't wait 😂

He didn't have to stay that long, he chose to.

'He’s obviously not thrilled being tied down for a weekend '

It's HIS child!

It's silly for him to work till that time before he is looking after your baby.
It's also silly for you to need multiple hours to prepare yourself for a weekend.

Suggest you let it go and try to have a lovely weekend.

I’d love to know how many uninterrupted 5 hour sleeps the OP has had since birth. Given she’s married to a workaholic, not many I bet.

You don’t really get a “leisurely” morning with a small baby. Sure if you were going away you’d want to spend the last few hours with the baby before you left it. Also if my husband had work at 1:45 in the morning and I was going away for the weekend I’d want to look after the baby for a few hours before I left so he could perhaps have a rest.

But if it’s easy, why do they suffer at all?

Or are we really claiming the massive pressure, the lack of sleep, loss of identity, lack of me time and struggle to fill the days are just because of hormones?

Yeah, sounds like you put quite a bit of effort into making it as easy as possible for him this weekend (to look after his own kid 🙄).

Don't give it another thought and enjoy your trip away. ✈ 🍷🍸🍹

If I’d got home at 1:45am and DH woke me at 7am to look after the baby so he could brush his hair for an outing that didn’t start until hours later I’d be raging. I don’t “get” the mentally prepare thing either - it’s not an exam or a job interview, it’s a fun trip with a friend. Him not liking the baby, not being able to walk his own dog or cook his own dinner is a separate issue. He could be the world’s biggest arsehole and still shouldn’t have been woken up so you can brush your hair. It’s not massively clear why he came home at 1:45 - is that within normal opening hours for his business? Did he stay late because he can’t work at the weekend? Does he faff about all day going to the gym and having coffees and then work late because he prefers it?

This.

He was unreasonable getting in at 1.45am knowing you would be leaving in the morning and need to get ready etc.

But I would maybe have let him sleep until around 8ish and then you still would have had a couple of hours. I do my hair but it never takes more than 30 mins!

Why would you not let DH catch up on some sleep? As well as want to spend time with your baby before you go away for the weekend? I'm saying YABU.

Aw thank you - I do try.

It says more about you to have that twisted reasoning than anything else 😂

leaving a baby alone, I agree, is more than unacceptable.
leaving a baby with his PARENT? What's wrong with that? Are you campaigning for dads to have at least 6 months paternity leave on full pay so they don't leave their baby every day?