friend wants to borrow £1k

I can think of only a couple of friends whom I’d lend £1K to. Also the only couple of friends who’d probably never ask as they wouldn’t get themselves in that situation to start with. DH lent £15k to a friend about 15 years ago. We got the money back, but it wasn’t pleasant and the friendship ended.

I would never ask any friends for loans. When I was young then yes my parents would sometimes help me out but I always made sure I paid them back as quickly as possible.

credit cards even for poor credit ratings should tie her over or an overdraft. If she says she can’t get them or has maxed out then she needs more help than just a short term loan.

She is counting on you to feel awkward saying no but her over spending on holidays etc is not your problem.

Oh grand’s a lot! And February is only at the end of next week. If you felt happy with lending her £200 and not getting it back (potentially) then just say that. Sorry can’t help you with £1000 will £200 help.

No,not under the circumstances you just described 🤔
She needs to learn to manage her money better

The £1000 is clearly for spends while she's on holiday.
Don't lend it unless you're prepared to give it to her, OP. She's asking for a lot of money without giving you a good reason why she needs it. Just tell her your savings are in a 28-day-notice account so you can't lend her more than the couple of hundred quid from your own money that you were expecting her to ask for.

Offer what you don’t mind lending then

You’re on MN, literally the home of some of the stingiest, tightest people I’ve ever encountered.

Only you know how your friend is with money, and if this is a rare temporary moment where she’s having cash flow issues, or if she’s irresponsible with money.

If you’re not comfortable with it, don’t do it, but it’s a shame that so many people are just instantly dismissing her as a CF instead of a friend who needs a momentary hand.

I would offer her 300 maximum at a push. It’s enough for an emergency buffer for anyone on a tight budget, she can ring finance company about the car payment.

Never lend money you aren’t prepared to lose.

Hard no from me. My cousins like this. Skint all the time loaning money to feed to kids but then some how gets 3 holidays a year when we very much don’t. I’d either buy her literally essentials or say you can’t access the money. She’s being cheeky af

Also a holiday is a luxury you wouldn't even consider unless you have savings. I think she isn't telling you the whole story.

To agree with a PP, if she's a good credit risk why can't she use a credit card or ask for a temporary overdraft? If she's not a good credit risk...that's for a good reason.

She needs to learn to manage her money better - if she's self-employed or otherwise in a job where she won't earn for a month if she's ill (or, presumably, on holiday) then she should have a financial buffer to cover that before she starts paying for cars and holidays. I get that the car might be needed for work but holidays aren't mandatory.

She probably just sees you as the easy option but if you lend to her how will it affect your friendship if she doesn't pay it back? Or she does in dribs and drabs while you look on in irritation as she pays for another holiday? And there's nothing to stop her turning to the Bank of You next time she needs tiding over, and the next and the next...

Just tell her it's tied up in savings accounts so the answer is no.

Exactly me too, I bet its more than a lot of people have!

advise her to ask her bank for overdraft ,it’s always good to have a buffer. If they say, definitely do not lend ( either way) as she’s a risk.
or she could apply for a credit card ( additional one if already has) and then cut it up once this period is over.
definitely do not lend friends cash.

I agree it is cheeky and bad planning to ask for a whole 1k tbh, especially with the car and the holiday. This would indicate to me that she is buying things that she can’t afford and doesn’t have savings for. So i would be doubtful she would pay you back properly.

I have been on the other end where I asked to borrow money from my best friend at uni to pay my rent, as it was due 2 weeks before my student loan came in. But it was only £200 and i could give her an exact date in 2 weeks when i could pay her back, which i did in full. And i learnt to budget better.

If you feel inclined to do so because she is your best friend, offer £200 at the most but only if you can agree when she will give it back to you and only if you feel confident she will actually repay it.

Just don't do it. That money is for you, your DH and your 4 DC not your friend.

A simple "I can't sorry" will suffice.

She's looking for spending money for her holiday!

It would be a 'no' from me. If she has no 'buffer' she will never be able to pay you back. Anyway, unfortunately your savings are all tied up in 60 day notice accounts.

I'd say no - that's a lot of money to us and we don't have it to lend.

You don't have to over explain that you are saving for a house or anything else - just say no.

I'd only lend that to certain family members - really only kids and then it would have to be money we could write off - which with house saving and 4 kids I'd bet you can't.

Stop talking about money full stop and say no to her. We did not need to know your finances in order to tell you to say no.

Big no from me

Don’t give it to her. She’s going on holiday ? She can get an overdraft .

A hard no

Its a kindness not to, your friend needs to learn how to prioritise re car and holiday and budget accordingly and if able to have an emergency fund.

I think the only circumstances I’d give money to a friend is if they were in immediate danger

No. She might have booked the holiday previously but she should be putting money away as a safety net against hard times like these. So if she doesn't have a safety net of savings, she shouldn't be booking holidays.

Tell her you can't as your savings are against a rainy day for you and you can't access them quickly. Or just keep saying "No, sorry".

A new car and a holiday is discretionary spending; she didn't have to spend that money - and you don't have to support her choices.

One of the reasons people get into debt is impatience and the want (not need) to have it all now. It's easy to flash a credit card or ask someone for a loan without any real thought or plan about repayment.

"No" will save you a lot of future grief and possible unpleasantness.

Don't lend her the money. She can use a credit card to bridge the gap until February pay.

If she is that hard up, cancel the holiday or sell the car.

Does she have a history of borrowing and what is her family setup?