To ask if you would ever forgive someone you hate

I don't generally hate people. There is only one person who I truly hate and I will never forgive him for what he did to me. I don't care if he's changed or not (it seems he might of) it doesn't change what he did to me and I can't forgive him.

There's only one person in my life who I have truly hated. I feel like I would be happy to hear they are dead. I can't imagine ever forgiving them and would still feel angry if I saw them, even though I rarely think about them anymore.

Their actions changed the course of my entire life. I am happy in my life now, but was deeply unhappy and traumatised for ten years.

I can't think of one person that I actually hate 🤔 some I don't like very much but not actual hatred. So I don't know if I'd forgive them or not.

It's a sliding scale.

There are (a small number of) people I've completely forgiven for the things that they've done. There are others I've forgiven for certain acts but I haven't forgotten that they did it and so I no longer entirely trust them. I don't hold resentment but neither do I pretend it never happened.
And the there is a very small list of people whose choices were so shitty that I feel no desire to forgive them. Instead I've worked on letting go of the resentment I felt towards them. I will forever avoid their company but I try hard not to let those feelings affect my day to day happiness.

Some things do not deserve to be forgiven and it is wrong to expect a victim of such action to forgive.

Rather hard to imagine forgiveness for someone who raped you. Or your child. Or who sexually assaulted you. Or your child.

Why would i waste head space on them?

No - I don't hate them, they're nothing to me. Even though they tried to make amends I have no time for them.

I don't hate people who wronged me. I am indifferent to them. You may call it forgiveness, I guess.

I will never forgive some members of my family for what they did. I have given up hating them as it took so much of my energy. Have been NC for 20 years, no regrets, barely any thought of them.

So my take is give up the hate because it is exhausting.

Anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.
Yes forgive for yourself, you dont have to spend time with that person, or forget, or allow yourself into a position to let anything happen again, but let go of the anger/hurt through forgiveness... it does feel better.

A family member. They aren’t sorry for what they did, blocked and out of my life now! I don’t forgive, I can’t do that, I can’t forgive or forget what they did. It does fester unfortunately, but that’s just me! They and their partner can rot in hell for all I care now.

No because some things are unforgivable.

What I have done is let go of the anger, because that was eating me up. That’s not the same as forgiving.

Absolutely not. For me to hate someone they must have done something pretty bad. I would cut them out of my life and not give them anymore of my headspace.

God no, they abused my child. The absolute burning rage I feel for them hasn't abated even slightly 13 years later so I doubt it ever will.

I don’t forgive . I cut them out of my life .
They don’t deserve my forgiveness .

No. Takes a lot to push me to hate, but once I’m there, it’s like they’re dead to me.

No real ongoing emotion, just cut them right out, and move on. Life is too short for these people.

As the Corrs once sang.

Forgiven, not forgotten.

No, but I don't keep hate in my heart. I just feel cold towards them if they're non-family. It's more difficult with family, so I'd say I put things aside, but I find it impossible to forget, so now I'm wary and avoid being in situations where they could do the upsetting thing again.

surely it depends what they've actually done and why you hate them, or think you hate them.

Ive never hated anyone.
They just become unimportant to me and when that happens, thats the end no way back.
Ive had some awful things happen to me over the years i come to realise, we dont get over somethings we just get better at dealing with it.

Its down to the person tbh how they feel how they deal with it and how they move on.

ABSOLUTELY NOT

Hate is a strong word. Why let it fester inside of you. That's like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die.

Just drop them and thoughts about them completely.

I live in hope my stepdaughter might say this about me in the future. I have another 15 years to go!

Forgiveness is one of the few teachings that I struggle with.

I will never forgive a parent for being abusive and making our lives a misery. It was a relief when he died, and I have no regrets in saying that.

I do not forgive my manager for screaming, shouting, bullying people out of their jobs, aggravating mental health conditions, etc. He may be forced to be nice now, but we do not trust him, and we would be overjoyed if he left.

I might try to understand such people, and why they behaved like that, but I can't forgive them, no matter how nice, polite and friendly I am.