School say they're monitoring lateness now and I feel sick about it

Because as someone who works in education you should understand how important attendance is and how disruptive regular tardiness is.

You need to get up 15 minutes to 30 minutes earlier if you are late on a regular basis. It really is that simple to solve.

I am surprised the teacher would mention this. This is normally dealt with by admin staff or SLT in a school.

I think your doing amazing. I've got a 4 year old at preschool and a 1 year old who saves his morning poo for the second we are about to leave the house most mornings, you've got a toddler and babya as well as a school age child, it's hard.
Could you make breakfast quicker? Fruit prepared the night before and clothes set out all ready for all children? I make toast just as I'm waking up my daughter and some fruit I precut (melon) or a banana. She takes ages to eat cereal so we keep that for the weekend.

I'm also tempted to put my oldest in breakfast club next year so I can drop her off then concentrate on feeding my toddler when we get back from the school run. My daughter's school is so laid back. If I'm late I can just knock on the classroom door and drop her off.

Why? OP is struggling and her kid is slightly late. It won't be forever will it? I don't see why she should stress about it all.

Set the alarm earlier.

agree to doing as much as you can night before

Quite frankly I think it's shocking that someone who works with children in a school would give advice like this!

I honestly would not give it a second thought! Just be honest and say its hard with a baby to think about too. I work in a school as a TA so many kids late and there is nothing the school can do. So give the teacher a nice smile when you are late and please don't worry you are not the only mum that struggles. The schools love to scare monger with monitoring sickness and lateness but they can't do a thing about it! Enjoy your time with your lovely kids and don't worry one bit!

YABU. Get up 10 minutes earlier.

YABU

No, of course it's not easy in the mornings, but it's your job to get your child to school on time, and as a PP said, you did decide to have two more children.

I'm not in the UK, so I don't know exactly how it works, but isn't there a drop off window of time rather than an exact time? When my kids were in primary school they could be dropped off any time between 7:00 and 7:30, with the school day officially starting at 7:30. If it works something like this, surely you would aim for the earlier part of the window if you keep being late. If it's an exact time - school starts at 7:30 and you have to wait outside with your kids until exactly 7:30, wouldn't you aim to get there before 7:30 rather than at 7:30 on the dot?

Here they definitely record and keep track of tardies, so I was surprised that you were surprised by this! If you arrive at school after the drop off window, you can no longer drop your kids off in the designated drop off location but you have to go to the front office and sign them in. Things happen and it can't always be helped, but of course it's disruptive, not only to that child but to all the kids in the class and the teacher, and it should me minimized as much as possible.

Assuming you've had a blood test, it should e on your medical records, so you could ask next time you have a medical appointment.

I never thought about it until I was pregnant, my blood test showed I was in a negative group, so we were asked what DH was.

This woman is asking for advice not criticism but well done you for shaming her! Be kinder… others manage it, it’s not hard

Who has size tens?

Everyone is with you on this op. I only have one school age child and I find the morning's sooo hard. Constantly trying to get her to lie down and go to sleep earlier in the evenings but she's just hyper and jumping around the place. Just know that you definitely are not the only one! Try not to worry about it too much x

Advocating missing days of school education but the Bible is fine and will make up for it? Yeah that explains it.

Hi,I work in a primary school and yes maybe the word monitored seems a bit OTT unless it is every single day which I doubt.
The main reason schools want lateness nipped in the bud is a) Schools want good attendance as they will be judged and I think it affects the amount of money they receive but I may be wrong on that
b) Believe it or not but it seriously affects some children as they don’t like to be the centre of attention when they turn up late,they want to fit in with their peers and be ready for class all at the same time.
I’ve seen when children arrive late the other children shout “Miss,Jack’s here now he’s missed register”etc etc
c) When a child or children arrive late to class particularly younger ones ie up to Year 4,it disrupts the whole class(obviously depending on what class is doing) but usually teachers do phonics or maths in the morning and having 3 or 4 children turn up late one after the other has a huge effect on the focus of children.
I speak from personal experience as I was often late with my daughter and didn’t think much of it,we had a long walk to school,I had another toddler etc etc until I found out that a couple of the children had made up a song about my daughter being late which I think really upset her.
I wouldn’t worry too much but maybe think about some little things that might make a difference.Good luck!

If you can get there 10 mins late you can get there on time. Sure there will be the odd day when everything goes wrong, but that's true for everyone.
If you have a clock in the kitchen which everyone uses to see what time it is, we have one on the oven, just set it 10 mins earlier, get everyone out of bed 10 mins earlier. If heaven forbid you are actually early to school your kids get a chance to play and don't feel stressed.
When my kid was in recep she had a sibling in nursery at another school nearby. Both entry times were 09:00. So I had to be late for one as it was 10 mins between them. So every day I had to go in the naughty parent's entrance and then "wait for a member of staff to record the lateness and escort the child to class". It was such bullshit, it was just a punishment for the child and the parent. Now all the schools round me are struggling for numbers and I'd tell them to stick their moronic punishment and their late book up their arses otherwise I'd take my kid elsewhere.

Mornings are shit and my youngest is 18. I’m screaming every bloody morning at him to get up as I get anxiety if he’s late for school. He drives himself to school. I tried the tough love but he’s just so laid back it washes over him.

@oBoltFireTen years ago I could have written a very similar post. I’m very disappointed for you that the problem has been addressed like this. The school’s focus here (in my opinion) should be finding out about your welfare/why you are late rather than monitoring.
Does the school have a pastoral lead? I would make an appointment with them (and if not, the head teacher). Tell them that you are unhappy that ‘monitoring’ is more important than understanding or checking welfare. Explain exactly what goes on at your house in the mornings. If they know you know it’s not ideal but are doing your best I think you will feel happier.
in terms of helping you get to school on time, could one of the other school parents pick up your dc on the way or is there another family your dc could walk with? Are you able to change your feeding routine? If your toddler is still in the buggy do they have to be wearing shoes? If they are walking too, do they have to be dressed properly or can you just stick a coat on over pjs? Look for anything you can do in advance e.g. lay out breakfast night before. Find small things you are doing that you can drop that will give you more time. Get your dc doing as much as they can for themselves.
I wish you well x 💐

Is there anyone who walks past your house and could take your eldest to school with them? You could offer to walk their child home in the afternoons in return maybe? I used to take my neighbours son to preschool with my youngest (and eldest to the school) not because of lateness but because their boy was a screaming mess at the door if they took him, but if I took him he would be so excited about going in with son that he was fine. in villages people are often happy to help each other out.

If not, then yes just aim to be at school 10 minutes early - with the lateness you’ll probably end up near enough bang on time. Younger siblings become super easy and adaptable generally as they are used to having to wait for feeds or be woken up from naps to go on the school run! My youngest is like that as he has always just had to get on with it in terms of waiting for his brother or going out to take / fetch him. Even now aged 12 if I woke him up in the middle of the night and said come on get your shoes on and in the car we have to do X or Y he’d probably just hop in the car before he even questioned anything! My eldest on the other hand is rigid with routines and cannot handle spontaneity at all!

As a teacher I would cut you some slack knowing you had 2 other little ones. If it's a couple of mins it should not be made to be an issue. However you know mornings are not working and it must be very stressful for you. If you can shift the routine so you can have an extra 10 mins would be better for you all.

Don't beat yourself up, speak to the teacher. Tell them you have everything in hand to get your child to school, but sometimes life takes over, a baby who needs attending to, at the same time as a toddler needs sorting. So if your DC is a few minutes late, that isn't you being tardy, it's you dealing with everything and everyone at the same time.

Things will improve, you have alot on your plate. Remember to breathe and remember you are doing a great job, being their mum....

Where's Dad? Can parents or friends help? Any other school mums willing to grab them on the way past and walk/drop off? Child minder?

I think the best scenario is getting up an hour or 30 minutes earlier. Everyone dressed, breakfast while you sit and feed baby?

You sound like a good mum.

Hope today went better for you OP.