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Why does society hate fat people

235 replies

welshcakes4 · 21/01/2026 17:10

For most of my 20s, I struggled with being overweight, mainly because of my unhealthy eating habits and not exercising enough. I definitely turned to food for comfort, especially when I was feeling down. I’ve never really been a drinker, smoker or taken drugs, so food was my go to. I’m 32 now and I’ve completely changed my life around. I’ve adopted a much healthier lifestyle and lost 4 stone, which has made me feel so much happier. Since I’ve slimmed down, I’ve noticed a big difference in how people treat me, especially men, but women too. Their attitudes have shifted, and they seem a lot friendlier now. I know this is a bigger issue, just look online and you’ll see all the nasty comments and jokes about overweight people. I came across one earlier, and it was surprisingly the women who were being vile.

It’s fine to disagree with someone’s choices. I guess the same could be said for alcoholics, drug addicts, etc, but why all the hate and vitriol? Why are we treated like second class citizens? We’re not bad people, we just have our struggles with food. We haven’t killed or harmed anyone. It’s so strange to me that people can get so worked up and angry over someone being overweight. I’ve genuinely never understood this.

OP posts:
SweeetFannyAdams · 21/01/2026 18:59

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:53

Not really, no. They don't like them because they think they are "cheap, etc."
That's part of the image that some people with tattoos WANT. It's really not the same as being overweight.

Well I can tell you for certain, it absolutely wasn't the image anyone on the numerous threads wanted!

They were mostly very hurt by it, in the same way a lot of overweight people on this thread have said they're hurt by negative attitudes, hatred and judgement towards them.

BubblesandTiara · 21/01/2026 18:58

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:45

That's sort of the point with tattoos though. It's something rebellious that your parents might not approve of or that you might have to cover up at work. Some other people not liking it is probably part of the attraction.

That might have been true many years ago (before my time) but there's nothing rebellious about tattoos. It might be for some, but they are so mainstream, they are no more rebellious than pierced ears.

Body tattoo I mean, might be a bit different when you completely cover your face, but that's more rare.

JenniferBooth · 21/01/2026 18:55

Nevs · 21/01/2026 18:41

Never heard of drug addicts being a protected characteristic in UK society. In fact I’m pretty sure druggies are way further down in the social caste system so to speak, than overweight people?

he was rehoused within three days

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:55

Anyahyacinth · 21/01/2026 18:54

Do people feel the same way seeing a tall person whose knees will be in their back during a flight?

Cross-posted with you.

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:54

jbm16 · 21/01/2026 18:51

I would say it's hate, people can live how they like if it doesn't impact me, but It's definitely awkward and uncomfortable commuting or on a flight, when someone tries to sit in a seat which is clearly not big enough for them, and you spend the whole journey squashed.

Tall people have their feet and legs in the way and spoil our views, but we don't have the same disdain.

Anyahyacinth · 21/01/2026 18:54

jbm16 · 21/01/2026 18:51

I would say it's hate, people can live how they like if it doesn't impact me, but It's definitely awkward and uncomfortable commuting or on a flight, when someone tries to sit in a seat which is clearly not big enough for them, and you spend the whole journey squashed.

Do people feel the same way seeing a tall person whose knees will be in their back during a flight?

Pollyanna91 · 21/01/2026 18:54

Sadly a lot of people are shallow and cruel, they can't see beyond the surface and enjoy finding someone to bully.

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:53

SweeetFannyAdams · 21/01/2026 18:47

Now I didn't say the MNetters in question simply didn't like them, did I?

I said they judged them as "cheap, chavvy, thick, nasty, common' etc."

Completely different to just not liking them, don't you think?

Not really, no. They don't like them because they think they are "cheap, etc."
That's part of the image that some people with tattoos WANT. It's really not the same as being overweight.

Anyahyacinth · 21/01/2026 18:52

There are lots of studies / many books that link fat phobia to racism as revered body types are often unobtainable

jbm16 · 21/01/2026 18:51

I would say it's hate, people can live how they like if it doesn't impact me, but It's definitely awkward and uncomfortable commuting or on a flight, when someone tries to sit in a seat which is clearly not big enough for them, and you spend the whole journey squashed.

sprigatito · 21/01/2026 18:48

Alcoholrecovery · 21/01/2026 18:42

It’s about being lazy and greedy. Slovenly. Ill disciplined. And not being worthy as a result of all of that. And no pity because its self inflicted. Unattractive. Uncaring about health and appearance. A scourge on the NHS.
that’s not my feelings but as a fat person I can say that’s how I think others perceive me.

but why this is the case? Fashion is a part of it. Fit and slim is fashionable. Designers want thin models to represent their brands.

being sedentary is not good for the body. Therefore exercising is sensible- healthy-a more intelligent choice. A more educated choice.
fat =poor diet= lower education = lower class.
it’s all of that

Yes, it’s this. Fat people are perceived as lazy, sloppy, greedy and lacking in character. It’s acceptable to be contemptuous and cruel about them. Scratch the surface of any MN thread about food, weight or appearance and you’ll find those attitudes. It’s really, really unpleasant, but punching down on fat people makes slimmer people feel fantastic about themselves. Superiority is a powerful drug.

SweeetFannyAdams · 21/01/2026 18:47

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:45

That's sort of the point with tattoos though. It's something rebellious that your parents might not approve of or that you might have to cover up at work. Some other people not liking it is probably part of the attraction.

Now I didn't say the MNetters in question simply didn't like them, did I?

I said they judged them as "cheap, chavvy, thick, nasty, common' etc."

Completely different to just not liking them, don't you think?

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:46

BestZebbie · 21/01/2026 18:38

I think society hates fat women a lot more than fat men - presumably because society also 'secretly' believes that the purpose of women is to be conventionally attractive things to look at for men and that involves being slim with obvious secondary sex characteristics.

The equivalent for a man is being short.

Anyahyacinth · 21/01/2026 18:45

GrethaGreen · 21/01/2026 17:22

I lot similar amount of weight a few years back and omg the difference in how I was treated was mind blowing. My biggest were medical personnel. They stopped patronising me and listened to what I was saying.

The statistics for morbidity for fat people often demonstrate they are treated later , cared for less and it relates to weight stigma and not body size. It’s literally a killer attitude

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:45

SweeetFannyAdams · 21/01/2026 18:33

Someone mentioned tattoos way up thread and it got me thinking.

I've been on MN 15 years and there have been many threads about people with tattoos.

Plenty of posts saying tattooed people look 'cheap, chavvy, thick, nasty, common' etc.

And a fair few of those posts were from MNetters who often posted in the diet topic about how overweight/obese they were.

No-one has the monopoly on hatred and judging others.

That's sort of the point with tattoos though. It's something rebellious that your parents might not approve of or that you might have to cover up at work. Some other people not liking it is probably part of the attraction.

Kaz620 · 21/01/2026 18:44

I’ve gained 4 and a half stone, OP, and I can’t believe how much more disrespectful people are.

MaddieJo22 · 21/01/2026 18:44

Interesting point.
I'm sorry you're ill. But I actually disagree with you when you say society hates obese people but doesn't hate ill people. Because I think society - or parts of society - do hate illness.
But - and I caveat this - in a nuanced way. They don't hate you, as an individual, for being ill. You're a face, and a name. They can comprehend that and feel sympathy for you.
But that's irrelevant without action and when contrasted with behaviour seen.
You can see it how it's reflected in legislation. SSP is much worse than SMP. People with legitimate illnesses, who need benefits, are forced to undergo intrusive PIP testing and then rejected.
Swarms of people call the legitimately ill "scroungers" and other things.

So they might not hate you on an individual level but on a systematic level do people care? It's an uncomfortable dissonance when considered.
Just my take. I do hope you heal. Wishing you bright days.

BubblesandTiara · 21/01/2026 18:43

youalright · 21/01/2026 18:13

I don't see how weight is how we view attractiveness obviously if you're 20 plus stone thats not necessarily attractive but I don't think being skinny is attractive either especially as people age it really ages people and especially women its nice to have a bit of shape nobody wants to look like a ruler.

You might not, but weight is part of attractiveness, in male or female. Standards vary depending on the culture, but models, actress, everything in our culture use the weight - but not only - as what define someone attractive.

There are a lot of body shapes in the range between skinny and overweight!

Alcoholrecovery · 21/01/2026 18:42

It’s about being lazy and greedy. Slovenly. Ill disciplined. And not being worthy as a result of all of that. And no pity because its self inflicted. Unattractive. Uncaring about health and appearance. A scourge on the NHS.
that’s not my feelings but as a fat person I can say that’s how I think others perceive me.

but why this is the case? Fashion is a part of it. Fit and slim is fashionable. Designers want thin models to represent their brands.

being sedentary is not good for the body. Therefore exercising is sensible- healthy-a more intelligent choice. A more educated choice.
fat =poor diet= lower education = lower class.
it’s all of that

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:42

Whyisseven · 21/01/2026 18:23

I've never heard of people being abused in the street by strangers for eating a mars bar or carrying a football.

I don't think people are judged for playing football, but for eating junk food, yes. Shouted at in the streets, I admit I've never seen/heard, but I've never seen someone shout fatty in the streets either, though I accept it happens.

Nevs · 21/01/2026 18:41

JenniferBooth · 21/01/2026 18:35

Because its a safe prejudice
Meanwhile the druggie who domestically abused my friend was classed as vulnerable

Never heard of drug addicts being a protected characteristic in UK society. In fact I’m pretty sure druggies are way further down in the social caste system so to speak, than overweight people?

bryceQ · 21/01/2026 18:40

People pretend we aren’t judged on appearance but this is simply not true.
As a society we associate fatness with laziness, lack of discipline etc and that thinness is a sign of virtue and hard work.
It’s mad that heavy drinking and partying are seen in a positive light “a party animal” “life of the party” even though this is so damaging health wise. But if you are even a bit overweight, regardless of your actual health, you are seen negatively.

I am not a supermodel at all, but I absolutely benefit from being perceived as “attractive” - people give me things free all the time.

Gwenhwyfar · 21/01/2026 18:38

BlueJuniper94 · 21/01/2026 18:18

I don't think so - we don't look at wealthy people that way, and they hoard resources to a far greater (astronomically) extent. We fawn over and admire them .

Not necessarily. We talk of 'fat cats' big company owners and the like.

BestZebbie · 21/01/2026 18:38

I think society hates fat women a lot more than fat men - presumably because society also 'secretly' believes that the purpose of women is to be conventionally attractive things to look at for men and that involves being slim with obvious secondary sex characteristics.

JenniferBooth · 21/01/2026 18:35

Because its a safe prejudice
Meanwhile the druggie who domestically abused my friend was classed as vulnerable