Modern life doesn’t work

@bathsmat absolute childhood poverty has declined. Relative poverty has increased slightly since 2014, having declined prior to that time (figures from the Institute of Fiscal Studies, published October 2024). I'd like to see it disappear altogether, but I genuinely don't believe that. Poverty in single parent families has declined overall since 1990s.

The current Government are looking to reduce childhood poverty, so lets hope they might achieve that.

I don't believe that is true. Benefits cover the cost of internet access. Also there are grants for laptops for children. What you describe is bad parenting (which needs to be addressed) not money related.

Again, not perfect by any stretch but there aren't many people dying of starvation or hypothermia these days

child poverty has increased though, this isn’t a good thing.

@Pricelessadvice
Did you have an 11 year old during lockdown?

@bathsmat you didn't, I did. Agree, there are lots of reasons for poverty and one of them can be if you are a single parent household.

@EstoyRobandoSuCasa I think there are quite a lot of two parent households topping up with UC too.

So, there's another reason to be grateful for being alive today, that there are state funded safety nets in place. Again, not perfect by any stretch but there aren't many people dying of starvation or hypothermia these days.

@MargoLivebetter I said life is expensive for young families in particular. Where did I reference single parents? I’m not sure single parent families are managing? Are more dc from single parent families in poverty? According to Gingerbread they are….

The ones I know have their wages topped up with Universal Credit.

@Pricelessadvice I agree. Ds just turned 18 and a few weeks beforehand we were counting down and i kept imagining how that countdown would feel during war times. I can't even imagine the sense of dread. Then sending him off terrified praying it will be over before our second DS comes of age. The men who gave their lives were only boys, young scared boys who wanted their mothers.

@bathsmat and @Netcurtainnelly you say that people can't manage these days on one salary but there are more single parent households than ever before. 1 in 4 families in the UK nowadays are headed by a single parent (figure taken from Gingerbread). How are they all managing?

Because having the basic resources like IT and internet access to persevere through the lockdowns as described was, for many, a privilege they did not enjoy.

There are two families I know through a voluntary programme. When the lockdowns hit they did not have computers. They lost out on weeks of education until the scheme which directed old office equipment to schools could deliver them clapped out old laptops with 2-3 hours battery life at most, and even then the kids had to ride around on the Metrolink to use the wifi because - you guessed it - no internet at home and the libraries were all shut.

Agree. People couldn't afford bills and rent and run a car on one wage.

Tragically my former colleague's 17-year-old daughter took her own life during lockdown. Her parents knew she was depressed, but she had appeared to be coping.

Some people found the restrictions and isolation of lockdown easier to cope with than others. I found it relatively easy as I'm an introvert who prefers working from home, but I don't see that as resilience. I was lucky, I suppose.

I do see what you mean. I'm about an hour outside of London, I have an 8 year old and the vibe here with the parents I know is very much a couple of nice hobbies they're really going to enjoy, and teaching them to choose between things so that they're not doing all the things all the time. I think my friends in London tend to do a lot more of the dashing around that you're talking about and I agree that it doesn't actually seem to make anyone very happy.

Children who show resilience have strength of character and perseverance. Aren't they admirable skills to be applauded? But instead you call it "privilege' - why?

I completely agree with this, and the post it was referencing. We don't know how lucky we are, when we compare our lives to the lives of those living through WW1 and WW2. And there are many countries that are at war right now where people have no food and shelter, and people are being massacred on a daily basis. Perspective is needed.

I would blame more parents with insane behaviour - see the threads about not allowing a 17 year old to spend a weekend at home alone. That will create young adults completely unprepared for real life.

Not the lockdown.

It's easy for oldies with grand ideas to look down at the kids when it's not their childhood / teenage years that have been impacted.

It's about time we walk away from the lazy parents using the "kids must be bored" as an excuse for their own laziness, and we pretend that the lockdown was not a horrible experience for many people.

I think we had better start having children and building our manufacturing base again. It looks as if the 'new world order' of globalization, which is causing manifold problems, will fold if not under the Trump's onslaught then via China et al. It is going to be necessary to revert to the nation state with proper borders and a measure of protection for nascent industries against competition from abroad. I am no protectionist, but unfettered free trade is not a panacea, indeed, it is the problem since it outsources wealth creation to somewhere else, which impoverishes us.

check your privilege.

Just because some kids had a boring but bearable lockdown (mine did) does not mean that all kids locked up have not been severely impacted and are not still suffering from the consequences - for many reasons, and without even mentioning the ones locked up in abusive situations.

it wasn’t exactly a WW situation you realise some kids had a very happy childhood during the war?

Making ridiculous generalisations is never helpful, and never true.

I think if you are unhappy, you need to make big changes. But most people are too scared to male huge leaps, in case they fail.

For myself, I was made redundant a few years ago, and it gave me the chance to try to be self employed. I now do less work, and earn a lot more money. Would I have handed in my notice, had I not been pushed? No! I would have been too scared to fail.

My adult DD and her DH decided that they wanted to live in Australia, as the cost of living is cheaper, and they wanted a change. They secured a working holiday visa, booked flights and left. Just like that. No jobs to go to. No place to stay. They landed, checked into a motel, and started looking for jobs and accommodation. They found both within a month. It was an extremely ballsy move, that paid off. But not many people would be so brave. If it was me, I would have lined up all my ducks before moving, but maybe that would be hard from 10,000 miles away? They just jumped on a plane....I mean, when you do that, you have to work it out at the other end, don't you?!

💯 this is why they are known (rightly or wrongly) as the snowflake generation.

I can see huge changes afoot not just economically but attitude related in the near future.

This is one of the reasons why I roll my eyes when people talk about how traumatised today’s children are about the Covid lockdowns.
The reality is that MOST children had access to the internet, phones, gaming systems, friends via phones/social media platforms, Netflix, TV, online lessons etc. Yes there were things they missed out on but it wasn’t exactly a WW situation.
God help the kids of today if a war akin to WW1 or 2 broke out tomorrow.

Copying stuff out by hand because computers have been magically unexisted is not a daily survival task.

Mine isn’t either but then there are the thoughts of whether your kids are doing enough, are they having opportunities to learn new skills, are they social enough, do they have places where they excel outside of school. School timetables are so crowded there isn’t the place for doing music, choir, drama etc that doesn’t end in an exam. It doesn’t feel enriching.

I'm so sorry you are suffering. I have a lovely friend who is autistic and every day is a battle for her. X

I completely agree with this. The Right to Buy is a huge factor in the housing problem. I've been on a list for 7 years...in the meantime I'm paying extortionate rent to a private landlord so can't afford to save anything.