Sleepover - opinions pls

And your evidence for that is what exactly? 🙄 Awful comment.

Plenty of nonces in the Scouts... just because they haven't been caught doesn't mean they are more trustworthy - it just means they enjoy spending their free time around kids. Which could be a massive green flag OR a massive red flag - there's really no inbetween and its impossible to tell.

I think it sounds great fun and I wouldn't have a problem with it at all. I also don't think it's that unusual for their age.

Nope wouldn’t be happening

My DD is 10 and there's absolutely no chance she would be going. I wouldn't even have the balls to invite a child for a sleepover without them having been to our house several times before. It's inappropriate.

If it was just the Mum and sister going, my answer would be different.

I had a more extreme situation in that my DD was invited on a weeks holiday abroad after knowing the friend for a few months. DD was asked directly - shown pictures and everything - before mother asked me! It was at the same time as a much less glamorous uk family holiday we had already planned.

I was very very uncomfortable and quite angry at being undermined. But I kept it all calm. Thought about what DD wanted. Got to know the family. Worked out details. It helped that parents were lovely and known to my DP through work.

I managed my issues. DD went on the holiday. She had an amazing time. The kids are still close friends some years later.

I would be cautious and not want my child to stay over.
Only exception would be that if I knew the child's parents were e.g. teachers/girl guides leaders etc... in that instance I'd be more inclined to let my child go, as I'd know in my gut if I trusted their integrity as someone who worked with vulnerable groups/children. But that doesn't guarantee I'd say yes, it'd just make me trust them a bit more than your average parent who didn't work in a role that requires an enhanced children's DBS check!!

I wouldn't allow it, and also wouldn't feel comfortable. Your phrasing is quite odd. 'Bold' of the mum to ask? I think it's a generous offer, a two day trip to a theme park. Doesn't mean you have to accept, or feel comfortable with it. Same with the driving - sounds like they are trying to make it work and you seem put out that they have offered.

I would feel exactly the same as you @Daisydoo23

Can you invite friend over before the trip?

And the driving thing is probably to try and prevent any inconvenience for you

Think you're being a bit OTT

The coming downstairs thing is odd but just your DD relaying information which might not be right

Fine to ask about sleeping arrangements- is the brother in a separate room? But maybe they would prefer a sleepover out of their house if they're particularly houseproud or particular (which the downstairs rule would imply)

It’s an easy no from me

I agree with you OP, I would feel uneasy about this as you don’t know enough about the family.

I would want to know what the room set up is. Where is the brother sleeping, and how old is he? Is the sister also bringing a friend meaning there will be 4 girls, the brother and the parents? If it’s 4 girls there it would make me feel a bit better about it as presumably the girls will have their own room and not everyone in together.

At 11 I would regularly have sleepovers at my friends houses with 3 or 4 girls and we’d all just sleep on the floor and laugh all night but we had all been best friends for years and our parents were all really familiar with each other but I never stayed in a hotel with any of them and their parents.

I think your concerns are justified, I wouldn’t totally rule it out at this stage as she could go and have a brilliant time and make great memories but I’d want more information about where the parents and the brother are sleeping and what the set up is.

you can always pick her up after the theme park if you don’t like the sound of it after you’ve got more information