To report bus driver that bullied DS

I’m confused, bus companies shelling out cash to people cos they are frightened of going to court, but they will shell out money apparently, and people like you can repeat it on forums like this?

It absolutely is bullying. The phrase 'it isn't hard' is completely unacceptable. Many people need support if various types when using public transport. The driver has been trained.

98% of people just make life hard work when you can't speak, and I say that as someone who had been bullied (partly for my teeth) to the point that I rarely spoke to anyone by the time that I left school. Sometimes I wonder if it makes them feel better to ridicule, and take out their bad attitude, on someone who they know full well can't give it back to them. They are absolute idiots. It's a very good way of weeding out those who aren't worth your time.

The other 2% are people like your DS's friend, and those people are worth knowing, and keeping in your life!

If the bus service doesn't have all of these apps and things, would your DS feel comfortable carrying a card to explain that he can't speak? It doesn't have to say why, but it might help to explain things sometimes. Alternatively, a pack of cards with common things (e.g. 'Please may I have a day saver/ticket to X? Thank you'), a phone app with large text, or even a whiteboard and pen might help.

I didn't say anything about buggies. I know that disabled people have received settlements from bus companies when buses repeatedly failed to stop for them, failed to lower ramps, and failed to ask other users to vacate the wheelchair priority space (I believe they are required to ask, though you're correct that they can't force people to leave the bus). I guess technically a settlement isn't a victory in court, but companies don't usually pay money if they know they are going to win.

Totally missing the point there!

Sorry OP i can imagine how furious you must be. So sad this happened to your son. Not reading thread but just want to say YES i’d be 1. Reporting driver for harassment / being a twat 2. Demanding to know what training is delivered to drivers (discrimination/inclusivity/ND awareness etc) 3. I would temporarily make other arrangements for son getting home, and that same day, I would board that exact bus with his friend and hold up the line of people while I rip the driver a new one. X

Yes, but that poster was in bad faith, trying to imply the kid had done something wrong. I don’t think responding in kind counts as being rude. It’s just standing up for yourself or a friend.

So it's okay for the bus driver to bully a young person, or bully anyone by your call?

What an absolute gem the friend is. Your DS is lucky to have them.

bus driver was a prick.

The OP says yes

"His friend admitted he got kind of rude back"

But if what they're saying about the driver is true, he definitely deserved it imo.

So?! Good on his friend for this.

Ho hum.

I would definitely complain.

Wheelchair users have won victories against bus companies??????

There isn’t a law that gives wheelchair users priority over buggies, and if you are talking about the man in South London he didn’t win - he was told in no uncertain terms including on the BBC News, if buggy users don’t want to unload/fold buggy and gave all possessions on their knee they don’t have to.

it is pure fabrication about wheelchair users LEGALLY having priority - they don’t.

I am so sorry this happened. I have a daughter (much younger) with SM and this is devastating for you both. What a knock back. I'm sorry. I would contact the bus company and complain. I would explain what SM is and say how they may need to retrain their driver. Make sure you mention key words like disability and inclusion so they know it's serious.

As someone who suffered from anxiety, I hope your son feels he can get the bus with his friend again once you have made the complaint. It is such a big step that he felt able to and I'm glad he's made a good friend.

No. HTH.

I read it differently, assuming the friend already has a pass which is cheaper and the norm, so he shows his pass and then asks for the daysaver for OP's DS, who hands over the right money for this. The bus driver refused to issue the ticket unless OP's DS actually spoke.

So then DS has not spoken, because he can't and his friend has quite understandably gotten rude with the driver who could just hand over the ticket instead of acting like a prick.

Lucky for you, you've not come across people who decide its their job to force a disabled person to do something they can't do - I've met loads of them - most notably, a psychologist I had gone to see regarding eating disorders, decided I did not need my wheelchair and could get out of it and sit elsewhere. She concluded this because my chair was obviously one I had bought myself (yes. With an NHS voucher) because it was purple, not grey, and therefore I obviously didn't need it and it was all in my mind. She really wouldn't let it go, it was a very bizarre situation and it turned out she had no idea what my physical disability was nor in fact that I have one and had just lept to the conclusion that the wheelchair was some sort of affectation!

we only have one side of the story. The bus driver on the other hand will have CCTV to show exactly what happened

What’s the update, op, is ds okay? xx

@Projecap

YANBU! What an absolute pig!

I'm so glad your son has such a lovely supportive friend though x

That doesn't mean they did nothing. It means you weren't going to be getting an update.

I’m sorry that happened but it isn’t bullying.

This is the one I've seen. And what a wonderful friend your son has. ❤️

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To be honest the amount of crap and abuse that bus drivers have to put up with on a daily basis I am not surprised that some of them somewhat blunt when dealing with anything that deviates from the norm.

@Passaggressfedup this was my first thought too. Why on earth would a bus driver get cross about one person buying two tickets for himself and the other person getting on the bus with him? It literally must make no sense. This kind of interaction must make up around 1 in 3 purchases on a bus. Driver will deal with this hundreds of times a day and besides, it would make the driver the opposite of cross anyway because it's one transaction less that needs to be processed, less time and less faff. It's a pretty frequent and usual occurrence on the bus and the opposite of extra work for the driver. There must be way more to this story because it makes no sense otherwise.

I have a son who has SM and I would 100% report this, the bus driver needs educating.

It's infuriating when your child manages to take a step forward and incidents like this can make them take 2 steps back.

It's great to hear your son has a friend who is there to support him and is able to speak up on his behalf if and when needed. My son too has a great supportive friend who speaks up for him through his own choice. There is some lovely people out there.