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AIBU?

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Irritating work situation

36 replies

PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 20:15

Pretty minor in the scheme of things, but this sort of thing seems to happen quite often.

I don't want to be too specific in case anyone recognises the situation, but basically there is a weekly event and I wanted some of my clients to be involved. Over a week ago I emailed the two people who were likely to be organising this and was told that Person A was going to be in (sole) charge this week. Person B also received this email, so knew this as well. Once I had been told this, I only communicated with Person A so as not to clog up Person B's inbox as they are brand new to the job and so assimilating a lot of information.

This morning I received an email from Person B telling me off because my clients had shown up expecting to be involved and she had already organised other people to take part. She said I should have contacted her earlier about it.

I wrote back, reminding her of the history of the situation. I've received no apology and can't help wondering 1) Why similar things keep happening to me when I feel I've been well organised; 2) Why she feels like she can speak to me like that when she's only been in the job five minutes and I have done various things to help her settle in (not my responsibility, but she asked for my help).

I have not imagined that I communicated everything the organiser (Person A) needed to know in a timely fashion. There was no reason for me to think Person B would also be involved when I'd been categorically told it was Person A's job, and no-one asked me to copy in Person B.

Am I doing something wrong that's obvious to everyone except me?

OP posts:
PrizedPickledPopcorn · 19/01/2026 21:36

Sometimes you have to play dim.

But I don’t understand! I’m sure you said Person A would be taking the lead so I arranged all this with her. Can I just check, do you prefer to be cc’d in to all projects, whether or not you are heading them up?

Upthenorth · 19/01/2026 21:35

Is A your peer and also a direct report of person B?

PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 21:31

FunnyOrca · 19/01/2026 21:30

Why didn’t person A communicate with either of you about the change?

They may not have been aware of it - I think Person B took it upon herself to make amendments without consulting with A, or with me.

OP posts:
PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 21:30

AlohaRose · 19/01/2026 21:28

Can you contact person A to find out what actually happened when your clients arrived? If they were there, why did they not remind B that they were in charge and had all the necessary information?

My clients went directly to speak to Person B before the event started.

I've no idea why A didn't remind B that he had told me (and her) that he was organising it - nor why B went ahead and started organising things herself despite this having been stated.

OP posts:
FunnyOrca · 19/01/2026 21:30

Why didn’t person A communicate with either of you about the change?

PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 21:28

Boggpeat · 19/01/2026 21:20

Clog up b’s email next time. They were maybe trying to impress being new. You left them with no information.

I shall, but I didn't leave them with no information. They knew what I was trying to organise from the first email) and they knew that Person A was in charge of the event so hardly a quantum leap to think I would have addressed any subsequent queries to him. I was never told that Person B was still involved with the organisation - or would even be there - so had no reason to keep her up to date.

Really I think Person A should have communicated better, but Person B should have checked with A before assuming I was the one who hadn't kept her in the loop.

OP posts:
AlohaRose · 19/01/2026 21:28

Can you contact person A to find out what actually happened when your clients arrived? If they were there, why did they not remind B that they were in charge and had all the necessary information?

PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 21:25

Notquitethetruth · 19/01/2026 21:16

As you have already replied to B you will just have to wait and see if they respond.
Keep a record of all your interactions with B and monitor the responses from other exchanges with them.
Possibly raise it with your line manager and ensure all communications are clear.

B is my line manager!

OP posts:
Boggpeat · 19/01/2026 21:20

Clog up b’s email next time. They were maybe trying to impress being new. You left them with no information.

Notquitethetruth · 19/01/2026 21:16

As you have already replied to B you will just have to wait and see if they respond.
Keep a record of all your interactions with B and monitor the responses from other exchanges with them.
Possibly raise it with your line manager and ensure all communications are clear.

PassportPanicFuuuck · 19/01/2026 20:41

Bump.

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