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AIBU?

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Original poster

To let 17yo DS quit college for a f/t job?

170 replies

PoliteSquid · 19/01/2026 15:16

My DS hated school, hates college and has no intention of carrying on with any kind of study. Although he’s only 17 and could decide differently in a few years.

He has been searching for an apprenticeship, head firmly in the sand about the 1 day a week of college/uni work!

This morning he has been offered a full time trainee role in an engineering company. It’s not an apprenticeship, it’s in house training. Well established company 2 big sites fairly local. It’s full NMW even tho he’s so young.

DH thinks he should stay at college as there’s only 4 months to go. DS wants to leave college immediately. I can see both sides but erring towards DS’s view. AIBU to let him take the job?

OP posts:
AprilinPortugal · 19/01/2026 18:02

Take the job. At his age, he's got loads of time to find out who he is and what he wants to do. He could always go back to college in the future if he changed his mind.

Theonlywayicanloveyou · 19/01/2026 18:01

AllJoyAndNoFun · 19/01/2026 18:00

Job but I would have a really serious chat with him (or as serious as you can have with a teen boy) about what he's going into - getting up 5 days a week to be there for 9 or earlier, no more long college holidays, and that some of it will be dull or difficult. His boss may be a wanker (in his opinion). He may look at his friends at Uni and think they are having a far better time.

So job but with eyes open to what FT work entails.

And yes, definitely have this big conversation first. Ask him to consider all these elements.

Theonlywayicanloveyou · 19/01/2026 18:01

Yes let him take it. If he changes his mind he’s still got 2 years in which to return to college without incurring fees as it’s available up to age 19

DizziLizzy · 19/01/2026 18:01

I'd say its a no brainer!

AllJoyAndNoFun · 19/01/2026 18:00

Job but I would have a really serious chat with him (or as serious as you can have with a teen boy) about what he's going into - getting up 5 days a week to be there for 9 or earlier, no more long college holidays, and that some of it will be dull or difficult. His boss may be a wanker (in his opinion). He may look at his friends at Uni and think they are having a far better time.

So job but with eyes open to what FT work entails.

ChocoChocoLatte · 19/01/2026 18:00

Job

IndysMamaRex · 19/01/2026 18:00

Take the job. It’ll be far more valuable to him in the long run & it’s an industry crying out for more people so he’ll be guaranteed a job once qualified

JoannaTheYodelingCowgirl · 19/01/2026 17:59

Let him take the job

Compulsory college education should be scrapped, not every kid wants to study after they leave school

ladyamy · 19/01/2026 17:58

Job

Menonut · 19/01/2026 17:58

My brother decided at 14 that he hated school and just bunked off. Back then they still let you take your GCSE’s and he got some decent grades. He then started college and again hated it, so he got himself a job with some in house training. My parents were like you and weren’t sure but as he’d been bunking off anyway they let him do it.

Fast forward 20 years and that job with some in house training in an insurance company allowed him to work his way up through that company and move to a multi national company and he’s now a vice president who earns a 6 figure salary and travels all over the world. Education isn’t for everyone and if he is going to stick at a job I say let him go for it.

nondrinker1985 · 19/01/2026 17:55

Job

WhereYouLeftIt · 19/01/2026 17:52

Job.

Lovelyview · 19/01/2026 17:51

PoliteSquid · 19/01/2026 15:16

My DS hated school, hates college and has no intention of carrying on with any kind of study. Although he’s only 17 and could decide differently in a few years.

He has been searching for an apprenticeship, head firmly in the sand about the 1 day a week of college/uni work!

This morning he has been offered a full time trainee role in an engineering company. It’s not an apprenticeship, it’s in house training. Well established company 2 big sites fairly local. It’s full NMW even tho he’s so young.

DH thinks he should stay at college as there’s only 4 months to go. DS wants to leave college immediately. I can see both sides but erring towards DS’s view. AIBU to let him take the job?

Job

Isobel201 · 19/01/2026 17:50

I did three years of college, then left and ended up getting a full time job in the civil service. If he's got the opportunity to earn money now, I'd say go for the job. What qualification is he doing college for now?

Tiptopflipflop · 19/01/2026 17:50

The job market for school leavers is dire. He would be mad not to take it.

it will also be detrimental to his future prospects to stay where he is because "left college before exams for great job with training " looks far better than "stuck out college for a handful of poor grades".

FitAt50 · 19/01/2026 17:45

100% take the job. I am a recrruitment manager for a University. We advertised for a Modern Apprentice aimed at a school leaver, 2 year scheme on £25,000 a year. We had 70 applications, of which over 50 had degrees including 2 phds. The job market is swamped with 'clever' people with qualifications and its very tough out there.

Bakequeen · 19/01/2026 17:43

Listen to your son. He not happy in college. Let him take the job and give him a chance to prove himself in a different environment.

BoxingHare · 19/01/2026 17:42

Job!

Uhghg · 19/01/2026 17:41

noidea69 · 19/01/2026 16:39

Do you think he will stick the training out though? If the answer is yes then no problem stopping college. But if in 6 months he's decided its not for him then might regret not completing college.

Show quote history

This would be my biggest concern.

My nephew was desperate to do an apprenticeship because he hated school and didn’t want to go to college.

He lasted less than 2 months because he wasn’t expecting it to be such hard work.
I think he was expecting it to be the easier option.

Some people thrive in it though.

I would try and see if he can finish his current course before starting this as if he drops out of both he’s going to be screwed.

DottyLottieLou · 19/01/2026 17:40

Take the job. That's worth more than a qualification but no job. You can get qualifications any time.

ilovepixie · 19/01/2026 17:37

Job. Education isn’t everything.

WiseKhakiShaker · 19/01/2026 17:36

My son was in exactly the same
position at 17. He took the job, like you I was conflicted. He learnt far more than he would have at school/ college. He’s now 30, has his own house , a baby on the way and earns very good money.

marsaline · 19/01/2026 17:35

Job for sure. There will be graduates trying to get that job. Jobs are hard to get at the moment.

herbalteabag · 19/01/2026 17:33

Definitely the job, it sounds like a really good opportunity with training that will probably be more valuable than college qualifications. He might not get another chance for ages but college will still be there.

yorkshiretoffee · 19/01/2026 17:32

Job. He'd be lucky to be offered that after the course so definitely take it now.

Is there anything to be salvaged from the course - modules taken and passed, etc, just to have something on his CV to account for the last year and a half?