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Squirrelling away money

36 replies

Berrybutler · 18/01/2026 21:35

How does one go about “squirrelling away” money?
Heading for divorce from cheating husband. Have been SAHM for the last 10 years and will be responsible for all childcare. Will get some money from STBXH but not enough really to see me through whilst I figure out my future job options.
‘We’ have a modest amount of savings here and there totalling around £15k but only I have access to the accounts the money sits in.
When people say to start squirrelling away money, what do they mean by that? Do I need to start taking cash out and stashing it somewhere?
TIA for any advice.

OP posts:
UninitendedShark · 19/01/2026 11:08

Berrybutler · 19/01/2026 11:02

Husband won’t notice £100/£200 cash being taken from accounts every now and again, and neither will he question the overall balance of an account at any point, but will whoever the divorce people are who look at finances, will they question why cash has occasionally been taken out and what it was used for?

This is why cashback at the supermarket is less obvious

Berrybutler · 19/01/2026 11:02

Husband won’t notice £100/£200 cash being taken from accounts every now and again, and neither will he question the overall balance of an account at any point, but will whoever the divorce people are who look at finances, will they question why cash has occasionally been taken out and what it was used for?

OP posts:
Jackiepumpkinhead · 19/01/2026 08:15

Beekman · 19/01/2026 02:21

I love my husband dearly and never want to live apart from him but I have a ltb rainy day fund because you just never know. Whenever I draw out cash, I put some (50-100) in a folder which eventually turned into a private bank account. Hopefully I will never need it but it’s there if I do.

This is a really sensible approach. I wish more women would be prepared for the worst case scenario.

99victoria · 19/01/2026 08:11

I kept cash. I made envelopes with £250 in each then stashed them away in places my OH wouldn't think to look (inside books etc). I had about £4000 when we eventually split
Yes, it's a bit risky (if i died they might never be found) but it was the only way to make sure it was untraceable

parietal · 19/01/2026 08:05

Yes your separate account will be part of the divorce agreement but that takes ages to sort. On the day you walk out, you need an account he can’t block so you can pay a rental deposit and new bills etc.

you can get an account with an online bank like Starling or Monzo and gradually move money in.

FancyBiscuitsLevel · 19/01/2026 07:43

Op you’d usually used that LTB fund before divorce was sorted, you’d use it for deposit for a new rental property or used for bills if he refuses to pay once he’d left. If you are expecting a fund to last for a long term after the divorce that’s not likely to work unless you go for cash in an envelope option.

Berrybutler · 19/01/2026 06:57

Thanks all. Yes I can do that easily enough. I was just concerned with having a stash of cash, just in case something happened to it. But having a separate account with money in that Ive gradually moved over would surely be found and have to be accounted for during divorce proceedings.

OP posts:
EricaJade · 19/01/2026 02:45

When I was on maternity leave and I had barely any money, my ex had tonnes. He'd give me his card to do a food shop (but would never give me cash) so what I used to do was buy a gift card or two as part of that food shop.

If it was near Xmas, I'd buy a few toyshop gift cards. I'd buy cards from clothes shops so I could buy the kids clothes.

Might be worth thinking about.

JennyWren5 · 19/01/2026 02:27

Please don’t just put cash into an envelope and put it straight into a bank account instead (ideally one where you can withdraw the money easily, the same day, with the highest interest rate available).

Beekman · 19/01/2026 02:21

I love my husband dearly and never want to live apart from him but I have a ltb rainy day fund because you just never know. Whenever I draw out cash, I put some (50-100) in a folder which eventually turned into a private bank account. Hopefully I will never need it but it’s there if I do.

caringcarer · 19/01/2026 02:15

When you go to supermarket get £50 cashback every time. Put it in an envelope it will soon mount up.

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